Scientific Proof Santa Doesn't Exist

Former Member

Teh_Gerbil wrote:

Nah, he was born in Spring mate. Lambs and all.

Christmas is a pagan festival absorbed by the Church and thier changing of everything.

Christmas today is nothing but commercialist whorism and exploiting people.

Spot on there. Dont get me started on new years eve either, what a waste of time and money.

Former Member

Teh_Gerbil wrote:

Christmas today is nothing but commercialist whorism and exploiting people.

Just imagine though if everyone took that attitude and these celebrations ceased to exist - what a boring life that would be. At least christmas gives you a chance to spend time with friends/family, have time off from uni/work, have an excuse to eat lots and lots of yummy food and generally just have fun. OK, it may have become a bit too commercialised but i'd personally prefer that than no one made any effort to get into the christmas spirit.

Former Member

Sounds to me like some sad bastard had nothing better to do with his time, to sit & work all that out! I mean cmon dude....he's Santa! He's more mighty than Mighty Mouse & more super than Superman!

Me thinks someone was a bad little boy or girl & didn't get what they wanted, so they decided to work that out instead!

I mean everyone knows that Santa has a magic stopwatch to freeze time & he then takes as long as he likes, casually strolling along with a handful of reindeer, stopping to munch on the mince pies & drink the milk. So all that scientific stuff goes straight out the window! Hee hee!

Former Member

freeallangels19 wrote:

Spot on there. Dont get me started on new years eve either, what a waste of time and money.

I don't mind NYE to be perfectly honest. At least they're not bastardising and cashing in on a very sacred holiday for one of the world's major religions.

Most people haven't a clue what Christmas is really about and all the commercialism and whorism as Gerbil so rightly said is downright insulting to people who actually take Christmas seriously.

NYE is better as it's almost an arbitrary date to pick to have a huge party on. At least no-one actually feels offended by it whereas a lot of devout Christians get offended by all the money-making and whatnot that surrounds Christmas - far removed from the real meaning of it.

Teh_Gerbil

NYE is an excuse to celebrate the fact that those who have survived hte year have done so, and to get very drunk and decrease our chances of making it past the first day of the new year by being highly intoxicated.

I think that is the BEST excuse to get wankered - surviving a year,m and letting ourselves indulge in stupidity.

Former Member

Teh_Gerbil wrote:

Nah, he was born in Spring mate.

Actually, he was born on the Feast of Tabernacles which is September/October time ...

Former Member

haha how sad is some american guy. Funny to read though. Hope no kid gets their mits on this thread!

Bunnie

has nobody got any christmas spirit anymore?

So, it may be commercialised, but so bloody what? Many people have a wonderful time at Christmas, and see people we haven't seen all year. We get to treat the people we love, and to show our appreciation to those that mean something to us. A wonderful meal is prepared, and there is a sense of commrodery throughout the period.

So to the OP, maybe it wasnt you who worked all of the stats etc out, but Santa another part of what makes Christmas. Yeah its for the children, but its also for the parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles etc. Its even for the people like myself who have not yet grown up.

So if people want to be scrooge like, think of those who don't, and think of those who look forward to it all year as its the only chance they get to spend time with their loved ones.

I think the Farepak issue is an illustration of Christmas spirit, just sit on that one for a sec.

Former Member

i think none of this matter to lil children u arse hole. its just a bit of magical fun for the littlies plus if santa did exist he probaly would of been arrested by now for being a peedo and breakig into peoples houses. get a life and get in the crimbo spirit

Former Member

i_am_bex wrote:

i think none of this matter to lil children u arse hole. its just a bit of magical fun for the littlies plus if santa did exist he probaly would of been arrested by now for being a peedo and breakig into peoples houses. get a life and get in the crimbo spirit

Ok. Firstly, the original post wasn't entirely serious. Loads of people have taken this way too seriously (though the science can't be faulted ).

Secondly, I'd arrest Santa for being a dirty paedophile. Just like the old joke -

- What's the similarity between Michael Jackson and Santa?
- They both go into kids' rooms and empty their sacks!

Thirdly, why should I get into the Christmas spirit if I'm not a Christian? I don't get into the spirit of Hanukkah as I'm not Jewish. Nor do I get into the spirit of Ramadan because I'm not a Muslim. For those of you unaware, Christmas was not in fact invented by shops to make money, it is actually a celebration of the birth of Jesus (which incidentally Muslims also celebrate in a lesser way as they consider him a prophet aswell).

Personally I think Christmas sucks because virtually everyone has forgotten the meaning and turning it into this commercial and secular circus is deeply offensive to Christians.

Imagine what would happen if people started adopting Ramadan as the new commercial and secular holiday? Fucking uproar is what.

EDIT: Interesting fact - the Russians celebrate Christmas on Jan 6th owing to a remnant of the Gregorian calender which was ditched in 1917 after the Revolution. This is also why the 1917 October Revolution actually took place in November.

Incidentally bex - are you a practicing Christian?

Former Member

Christmas is supposed to be a holiday for every1 to enjoy and have fun... whether santa exist or not is up to u to decide... hes a character that is told to children for them to have something to believe in and be good

I dun belive that santa exist and i dun care if anyone else belives or not... juz have fun with ur family and frens during christmas.

Former Member

What are 'frens'?

Former Member

Thunderstruck wrote:

What are 'frens'?

Ur matez innit!

Former Member

i thought those calculations were inspired!! a lot of effort which i appreciate in all the best humor! i especially like the part about vapourising raindeer and a mushed santa!! very funny!:thumb:

Former Member

Thunderstruck wrote: »

I post this every year so here we go for another year.

---

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in
the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim,
Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this
reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378
million (according to the population reference bureau). Assuming an
average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that computes to 108 million homes - presuming there is at least one good child in
each.

Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the
different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to
west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per
second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good
child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop
out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the
remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left
for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh, and get onto
the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is
evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be
false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are
now talking about 0.78 miles per household. This amounts to a total
trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks.

This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000
times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest
man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4miles
per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles
per hour. The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element.

Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO
set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousands tons,
not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can
pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying"
reindeer can pull 10 times the normal amount, the job can't be done
with eight or even nine of them---Santa would need 360,000 of them.
This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh,
another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen
Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch). 600,000 tons travelling at 650
miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this would heat up
the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the
earth's atmosphere.

The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of
energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames
almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and
creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer
team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right
about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it
matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a
dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to
acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems
ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by
4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs
and reducing him to a dribbling mess of twitching innards.

Therefore, if Santa ever did exist, he's dead now.

Merry Christmas everybody.

I like it that much I just nicked it!

Former Member

I like it. Santa should give me coal, a lump of coal a year, sooner or later it'll be worth tons in hundreds of years! Can be family generations inheritance!

Former Member

Ion-shield, duh

Former Member

STOP RUINING SANTA FOR ME DAMN IT!
I like the idea of a strange man empting his sack in my room....wait what? I don't like it anymore

Former Member

For Santa to exist, he has to be within our universe. For him to be within our universe, he has to follow the laws of physics. So saying he is magical won't save him from the bone-crushing pain of force. :thumb:

Former Member

Arthur C. Clarke wrote:

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic

:yes:

Former Member

you copied this stuff from a website


anyways, it's just parents trying to fool little kids to make them happy.

**helen**

Super old thread, going to close it now :thumb: