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MAP lectures
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I confess this is mainly a rant, but I'm also wondering if it's just me.
I've needed emergency contraception 4 times now (not the best record I realise) and 3/4 of those times I've been made to feel completely stupid and like a promiscuos so and so.
The only time I wasn't completely belittled was on a Scout camp when I probably deserved it having got very drunk not realised I'd not got my pill packet with me.
This morning took the biscuit, saw the practise nurse yesterday, explained the condom failure and got the MAP, and my dressing done as usual. Went back this morning for another dressing and saw the locum nurse, who came out with all sort of tripe about 'you're obviously not struggling too much if you're getting up to all these antics' and 'shouldn't a smart girl like you know better'.
Got similar lectures and completely patronised, and my private life nosed into the previous times at the walk in centre.
:banghead: :banghead:
I've needed emergency contraception 4 times now (not the best record I realise) and 3/4 of those times I've been made to feel completely stupid and like a promiscuos so and so.
The only time I wasn't completely belittled was on a Scout camp when I probably deserved it having got very drunk not realised I'd not got my pill packet with me.
This morning took the biscuit, saw the practise nurse yesterday, explained the condom failure and got the MAP, and my dressing done as usual. Went back this morning for another dressing and saw the locum nurse, who came out with all sort of tripe about 'you're obviously not struggling too much if you're getting up to all these antics' and 'shouldn't a smart girl like you know better'.
Got similar lectures and completely patronised, and my private life nosed into the previous times at the walk in centre.
:banghead: :banghead:
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Comments
Todays nosiness was especially bad (she was only supposed to be doing a dressing) but even when you can tell they are working to their protocols in the walk in centre, they ask so many personnal questions and give you such a patronising 'talk' it does my head in. You wonder why some people are put off getting it.
They should keep their nose out and i would mention what she said to someone too like everyone else has said.
GPs receptionists are another matter that I could rant on for hours, but here I'm talking about the actual nurses.
It seems that regardless of what you say may have happened, they assume you may have been intoxicated, taken advantage of and have no idea of what safe sex is. I hate being judged when I'm trying to do the right thing.
My experience is that they will rightly impress this on you, and if you keep going back time and time again for the MAP then they will rightly bollock you for it. It's a waste of the NHS's money, its a waste of their time, and its potentially damaging to your health.
Condoms fail which is why all women of child-bearing age are advised not to rely solely on condoms.
I am well aware of the gravity of the situation and the health implication, and of the risk of failure with condoms but believe it or not they occasionally tell you to stop taking the pill for medical reasons and don't come up with an alternative to use as well as condoms immediately.
While it would cost the NHS less if it was never needed in the first place, I suspect it costs them a damn sight more if someone doesn't get it.
The quizzing and the lecture you get makes it very very tempting to lie, which surely isn't the best plan in the world for anyone. I learnt that after the first time, having a boyfriend who is 8 years older than me meant I got a huge quizzing where she probed completely into my private life trying to ascertain whether I was being taken advantage of. Yesterday I lied, and went for him being the same age as me to avoid that. Now that has no real consequence, but people could be tempted to lie about other things that may matter.
I don't want it handed out like sweeties, but a little less humiliation may go a long way.
Also bear in mind that everyone says that "the condom broke", regardless of whether it did or not. It's hardly surprising if people aren't believed.
Sure, some nurses could be a bit sweeter about it (the fact you can't take secondary contraception should have been noted in your case) but in general I think that they are right to make sure that the people who come for the MAP need it and aren't taking the piss with their contraception and sexual safety.
I find it ever so slightly amusing that the best experience by far seems to have been a Scout camp site hospital, 6am on a shift change!
But yeah, if anyone is in the London area, Boots the Chemist on Marylebone High Street has a very helpful staff member :yes:
To be fair though, she could have gone to another/back the following morning...
The biggest reason for complaints in the NHS is "attitude" and it saddens me to see something like this happen. However, you also have to accept that many people take the piss and use services like this as an alternative and we would rather treat people who needed us than those who take no responsibility for their own actions.
It just seems a shame that those who have had genuine accidents are put through such humiliation. I suppose my post from the other night shows that it makes at least some think twice before getting emergency contraception.
She did, it was hidden away at the bottem.
I do find it sick that a pharmacist, not only refused a medication, but that they actually are allowed to. Just because the medication at hand was not ment for asthma, a UTI or some other medical ailment does not mean it is any less usefull. Would it be seen as ok if a pharmacist wouldn't give anti-depressents because they believed medicating is not usefull? It is not the place for a pharmacist or nurse to judge a patient or medicine taker. It is their job to help. This whole thing makes me sick and feel very very luck that I have not run into any rude people of the medical profession yet.
Whilst not indicative of anything significant (nor am I being judgemental here), it does highlight that some people rely on these services more than others. now if you consider that you are careful and yet needed it so often, how many people do you think those nurses have seen who just couldn't give a shit. After a while it grates.
That doesn't defend their attitude but at a time when we are seeing NHS resources spread thinly, it does piss you off when people abuse what is there and so we spend moeny in places which we would rather not and don't invest where we would like to. Don't get me started on GUM....
missed that.
Fancy giving me a crash course? I've had this conversation with our practise nurse (who is also a family planning trained) and we can't work out what I'm doing wrong. I use usually use oral contraception as well as condoms (which we always pay for ourselves as apparently they can't give you latex free ones), and the only times we've ever had a problem with condoms are when I've been off the pill on medical grounds, it's not like we regularly have problems... Maybe I did something wrong in a past life.
Fingers crossed I won't be wasting any more of the NHSs money on this one, as after this time I think I've decided that total abstinence is the best option unless I know I've got two forms of contraception! :impissed:
GUM clinic. All free and they're usually nice peeps too.
EXCUSE ME !!!
So, for instance, a catholic would be within their 'ethical code' not to dispense/sell any form contraception. What if a pharmacist didn't believe mental health problems existed, they'd be allowed not dispense medication ? What about HIV medication. Suppose being gay was against someone's 'ethics' they'd be entitled to refuse me my HIV medication ?
What a load of shit.
But you're not, are you. Your using protection, and has been said a squillion times before no method is 100% effective. You've used protection, it's gone wrong so you go for the morning after pill. I don't see any problem with that.
Even our local GUM clinic seem to only deal in your standard durex latex jobs. Does make me laugh when you explain you've got a latex allergy, so they double check the gloves they're wearing and everything like that and then hand you a bag of latex condoms :banghead: . Someone once helpfully suggested that I could have femidoms instead......
I can see why you're annoyed. They should inform you of the risks, but at the same time be non-judgemental. Working in the NHS i can see areas of unnecessary expenditure every day which annoys me, as they say they cannot afford to staff us properly!! However you have to remain neutral. The MAP is a necessary expense, and i can understand that these nurses may be annoyed by the girls coming in to use it as a regular form of contraception, but they should not take this out on the patients. Telling you about the risks is one thing, but being judgemental is another! And as for asking how old your boyfriend is, that is completely irrelevant. You are using protection and it failed, you are not ready for pregnancy, and you have sort appropriate help, end of. If you feel they were rude, then complain, they have no right to judge you like that :yes:
I would go to one of the chemists where it's free for under 21s..they don't ask for ID and when I went there the chemist was lovely and took me into a room at the back.
On the massive waste of NHS money, it costs £5.11 (plus nurse time) if you get One Step from the pharmacy free as an under 21 it costs £13.55. Considering what the NHS already spend money on that doesn't seem too horrendous to me.
Source: BNF
I don't think the cost is really relevant considering the cost a baby would mean to the state.
Accidents happen, whether it's condom splitting, pill not effective or taken properly or just passion, or even boyfriends/partners persuading women to have sex without any contraception. Women should not be put off from getting the MAP because of judgemental attitudes.
There was a case in Birmingham recently where a Muslim pharmacist refused to give a woman the MAP.