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confused

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Well me and my gf were having sex last week, up until that point i was a 23 year old virgin. I was quite nervous and although i had no problems 'getting it up' so to speak. Only trouble was when it came to putting on the condom or going to do it everything would fall flat so to speak.

This has led me half a week later to question my sexuality. I have never thought about 'doing it with a guy' and still don't to be perfectly honest but find myself not disturbed by the idea. When i see a guy now i get a rush in my stomach but nothing happens in the downstairs department, whereas when i see a girl i dont get the rush feeling but when i think more i get something happening in the downstairs department.

Just wanted peoples thoughts on this, could i be bisexual, bicurious or just gay? Or has the fact of my first sexual encounter built up a certain nervous edge to me? It doesn't help that my gf lives a bit away and we dont see each other very often and i am just feeling really uneasy all the time. Is this normal have people gone through this before?

Thanks,
Rolly

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dude slow down there youth!

    everyones first time is abit shit, mine was near enough the same as yours got to the putting the condom on then i said goodbye to the bonk on!

    its just nerves and most of it is psychological and you think your relaxed but you aint its still rushing around inside you.

    dont worry dude it will come.......................so to speak lol

    No need to question your sexuality about it
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dude slow down there youth!

    everyones first time is abit shit, mine was near enough the same as yours got to the putting the condom on then i said goodbye to the bonk on!

    its just nerves and most of it is psychological and you think your relaxed but you aint its still rushing around inside you.

    dont worry dude it will come.......................so to speak lol

    No need to question your sexuality about it
    I'd say that's about right.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ive always had simialr problems with condoms, it has absouletly nothing to do with sexuality.

    It should get better with time, but dont keep trying again and again in the same night, its best to leave it and just enjoy foreplay.

    What condom brand do you have, i found durex featherlight - i think thats what there called, there a red packet are the best soloution once there on you dont really notice them.

    if it comes to it, discuss the idea of your girlfriend going on the pill, although that wont stop you from risking STI's unless she is a virgin
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    would getting her to put the condom on you be better? it would take the pressure off you having to sit there and do it whilst shes watching
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's hot.

    Yeah, up until her nails rip the condom. Very annnoying :impissed:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Speakng from experience?

    Yes. Her would be me :chin:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    First few times I had sex with my boyfriend (both of us had had sex before) that happened. Got around it by me putting it on him, and then going down on him, and after a while he was able to do it himself with no problems. We recently stopped using condoms having been together 18months and me being on the pill, he just doesn't like any of the ones we tried.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Condoms are a fucking pain to put on. It gets easier with experience but if your john thomas goes a little limp it doesn't mean you're gay or that you don't want sex with a woman.

    Make sure that you're trying to put them on the right way around- the ring should be on the outside of the latex, not the inside, so that you can just roll it down.

    I wouldn't worry, but I'm always glad I didn't have the distraction of condoms on my first time.
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    SkiveSkive Posts: 15,286 Skive's The Limit
    lipsy wrote:
    would getting her to put the condom on you be better?


    With her mouth! :naughty:
    Weekender Offender 
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Cheers for the replies guys, glad to know I am not the only one thats happened to, we tried everything that day but nothing would come off unfortunately!

    It was more the feelings later on that i was more concerned about rather than the incident. I think your right and its a psychological 'leftover' from the incident itself and my thinking since. It all it still doesn't stop me from feeling really weird and sort of depressed about the whole situation. Adding this to the fact that me and my gf cant see each other regularly has made it harder for me to deal with everything.

    Thanks,
    Rolly
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Dude, I'm 36-y-o and I've been married for 15 years. I still have problems there if I take too long. Thank god we don't use them these days so much.

    Shit happens and you need to get over it because it will just eat you up. Sex is supposed to be fun, don't pressure yourself so much. Your performance that first time will not be the most important thing to her. The fact that she is finally doing "it" with you will be. Performance comes with age and experience.
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