How long does it take you to move on?

Former Member

Hey all
(put yourselves in my shoes)
ok so its your in a serious relationship for 2 years, best thing since sliced bread.

Then it all ends...just stops..no messy endings just everything you wanted is gone.

How long would it take you to be happy again (not with someone else) but to have accepted it and so on and so fourth.

I ask because its been 6 months and last week, i dont think i thought of her once think omg i miss her etc.

Im only posting this because one of my friends asked me how "i was doing". lol

Im actually really happy and ready to start getting out there again meeting people.

Thoughts anyone ?

Former Member

I boke up with my ex and was on the pull again about 3 weeks after. But it had ran it's course.

Before that, I was looking about 6 months or so.

Former Member

Phoenix_ wrote:

I ask because its been 6 months and last week, i dont think i thought of her once think omg i miss her etc.

Im only posting this because one of my friends asked me how "i was doing". lol

Im actually really happy and ready to start getting out there again meeting people.

Thoughts anyone ?

Haven't you just answered your own question?! Sounds Like you're there... :thumb:

Former Member

LoL, im just curious about other people

..just want to make some comparisons...plus im really bored...

Former Member

It does sometimes take a while with me, but like I said in the other thread - I usually find it hard to deal with the shit that went on, rather than necessarily missing the person themself.

Had a couple that fucked with my head for the best part of 2 years, and it took me a while to get my head round the shit that happened, but I got there, like I knew I would.

It is good when you move on and you're happy though, eh? :thumb:

Former Member

depends sometimes ill be able to get over it if i felt it was ending anyway/was bored of the other person etc
but if i was really in love with them and everything was perfect then one day they dumped me i would be quite upset but im normally quite good at getting over things, i just ignore it and pretending it never happened but i would be upset if still saw them each day as a reminder but it would take me how ever long it takes for me to get another boyfriend really because i get more attached to the idea of having a boyfriend than the actually person-weird i know, so aslong as i have another guy to go off with i would get over it pretty quick but if i was alone for 6 months that would mess me up a bit probably

Former Member

Phoenix_ wrote:

Hey all
(put yourselves in my shoes)
ok so its your in a serious relationship for 2 years, best thing since sliced bread.

Then it all ends...just stops..no messy endings just everything you wanted is gone.

How long would it take you to be happy again (not with someone else) but to have accepted it and so on and so fourth.

I ask because its been 6 months and last week, i dont think i thought of her once think omg i miss her etc.

Im only posting this because one of my friends asked me how "i was doing". lol

Im actually really happy and ready to start getting out there again meeting people.

Thoughts anyone ?

As you said before hun, you and me are in the same boat.

I've gotten to the stage where I may only cry once a day, and even that isn't a lot of crying, but I still think about him every second :crying:

Its been three weeks tomorrow.

And 3 months of no contact, which, even though it was my call, I am finding it very difficult to do. He isnt texting or emailing back to my about 3 times where i have contacted him, and he's doing that to help me get over him, but still, it hurts.

So going by your sitch, I'm guessing about that long too... maybe longer as was first love and whatnot.

Scary :nervous:

Former Member

Violette wrote:

its taken me years.

Can I ask why? Like was it a really wrong relationship?

Did you have a very intense friendship etc?

If you dont wanna say then cool

Former Member

like others have said, i think it is going to depend on the people, the relationship, the circumstances.

speaking for myself, i was with my ex b/f for 7 years and we broke up at end of Feb this year so thats been 8 months now and i am not 'over it' yet. In fact, I think it is bothering me more now than it was before. Immediately after it I was really upset but then I kinda threw myself into life and tried to keep extra busy and not think about it, just move on. Everyone commented about how 'well' I was doing. Of course, there were ups and downs - times when i felt perfectly fine and times when i was distraught (particularly since contact with him has been pretty messy since then). Now life has settled down a bit and i do find myself thinking about him a lot and about the relationship and my decision to end it and it is still tough and upsetting, for sure.

I just keep telling myself that this is normal after we had such a long time together. And reminding myself of how different my life is now and all the good things about that. I have a new boyfriend now too which in some ways is immensely helpful as I am moving on with a new life but in some ways is difficult, particularly when i am feeling down/upset about it all and I dont really feel i can speak to him about it as I dont want to bring any issues from the old relationship into the new one.

I guess it will just all take time.

Former Member

Two of my relationships, I was pretty much over before we broke up, mainly because they should have ended long before they did. I and the bf were simply too scared to end things. They were fairly long-term, 18 months and 2 years and after that kind of time, it can be scary being on your own. I rebounded from one to the other, and was pretty ok.

When I broke up with the 2nd bf, I rebounded again, pretty much straight onto the third, probably before I was ready. The third and I broke up 6 months ago. He was a complete arsehole, but I'm still not over him 100%. I've stopped crying about him, and I can easily just be friends. If he ever asked me again, however, I'd say yes straight away. So basically 6 months and counting for me..

Former Member

Love:TheRedOfTheRose wrote:

As you said before hun, you and me are in the same boat.

I've gotten to the stage where I may only cry once a day, and even that isn't a lot of crying, but I still think about him every second :crying:

Its been three weeks tomorrow.

And 3 months of no contact, which, even though it was my call, I am finding it very difficult to do. He isnt texting or emailing back to my about 3 times where i have contacted him, and he's doing that to help me get over him, but still, it hurts.

So going by your sitch, I'm guessing about that long too... maybe longer as was first love and whatnot.

Scary :nervous:

Thing to do is stop contacting. It just makes it worse. Go out with your mates and have fun. You will know when you are over it becuase you dont think about them anymore and you wonder what U ever saw in them. Time is your friend and it fixes everything. Best way to get over someone is to find someone new. Its the fastest way. But...... Make sure that you have flushed them out you life 1st otherwise you take baggage into your new relationship. Learn the lessons and move on. SDA.

Former Member

Me and my boyfriend have been together two years now. We were talking the other day and we were both saying we don't know how we'd manage it, especially if the relationship ended over cheating or something of the sort.

I would guess, it'd take me 6 months to a year before I could consider myself over it. Me and my boyfriend are very close though, especially compared to other couples we know. I suppose it'd depend on the situations around the breakup, and the relationships strength.

Former Member

I think it varies on the length and intensity of the relationship. They say that it can take the same time as the length of the relationship to get over someone. But, that might be excessive for a long relationship. My take it on it would be anywhere from 6 months to 2 years.