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Using internet to meet people
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
So what do you all think about meeting people on the internet? Is it really sad?! Does it ever actually work? I've met this girl on the internet, she seems great, we seem to have loads in common, have been texting and stuff. How long do you think I should go before asking if she wants to meet up? I think she likes me so far, but she's quite young (17 to my 21) so maybe she'll be a bit timid about someone off the net. Dunno. Discuss!
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Quite a common way of meeting people these days, and pretty effective.
I wouldn't rush to arrange a meet, it will come naturally as and when. It's something that can and does add to an internet friendship, but if its your first one I'd take it slowly. Talk to her about it when you're on MSN, and obviously don't forget the golden rules of meeting a stranger.
However, I've met a mate or two off myspace... One is a postman and photographer and is totally awesome, the other I ah... Liked a lot.
Actually a member of thesite has transferred to my uni and a mate introduced her to me and she was like "I know you from thesite" and I was like... :eek2: wtf???
She cool tho... A fair few people off thesite are sound.
Noted. Yeah, I've met two girls off the internet before, one was disastrous, the other one wasn't really going anywhere so we both agreed to call it a day. Both were a long time ago. And yeah, I'm not in a rush as such, I just don't wanna let it go or leave it to long because I am actually interested lol, but yeah, i'll try and take my time...
Yeah, it wasn't like I was looking for it online - it's never been a favourite method, I just tend to look on these things for shits and giggles usually, but then I came across her and was actually interested and have got more interested since, and as you may have seen from a recent post, that's rare with me, because I can't be arsed alot of the time these days. So, just wanna make sure I don't screw it all up before I start lol...
However, I don't mind meeting friends from the internet provided they know it's platonic. That's cool with me because on places such as myspace you can see what their interests are and what they are on myspace for (friends, networking ect). Again, you have to be careful because there are a lot of predators online.
Yes. Rope, duct tape, chloroform, rubber gloves and a good idea where to bury the body!
Me and my bf met on faceparty, and while neither of us were looking for anything serious, it all just came so naturally and was just brilliant from the start, whereas there were plenty of ones who were rejected quickly and painlessly.
Ive also met a few real life friends online. One of my best friends I met in a chat room, and it turned out she lived down the road from me. That was 6 years ago now.
Absolutely. Meeting new people face-to-face can be awkward for a while but if you have spent some time online beforehand gauging their likes, dislikes, personality etc it gives you something to go on when you do finally meet up.
If it's a big ugly bloke i'll just remove his meat and two veg with a blunt pair of scissors...
Yeah. I wouldn't agree with Moonrat that it's only for people with a lack of social skills - so many people are at it these days. I do however, think that the internet and mobile phones are maybe not helping our social skills these days...
But at the same time if someone came up to someone in a club with the sole intention of having sex they'd be thought of as a bit desperate. I would.
There's a quote from the film "Birthday Girl" which fits quite well here I think: When you think about it, England is just a small island. I mean, I know that gives you about 20 million girls to choose from, but if you live in a small town and work long hours, you're just not going to get the chance to meet them all. I always thought people who did this sort of thing were... I had an image
that they were losers. Not losers. A bit sad. But I think this is the modern world. And I think really it's quite a brave move. Quite a brave, reasonable thing to do. (He's talking about getting a Russian bride off the internet, but the sentiment applies just as well to any way of meeting people online).
There are a lot of predators anywhere. You have to be careful, but no more careful than in most situations where you're getting to know a stranger better.
:yes: I think that to an extent tbh. However, I do agree with Kermit about the whole clubbing thing to an extent too. Nothing is worse than boys approaching you desperately in clubs. I met a boy from the internet once. I had just come out a three year relationship and was going through the stage of "needing someone" because I wasn't used to being alone so when this boy came along, I was like, awww he's lovely sorta thing and became close to him very quickly. I wanted everything I had from my ex, out of a serious relationship too soon. I don't think I would have met up with him if I was myself tbh. He was a lovely guy and still is but like, its not something I do. I don't meet boys off the internet. I like to be mates in real life with a boy before I date them. Anyways, we dated for a while but it soon fizzled out. It was when I realised that I wasn't the only girl he had dated from the internet that I thought "can't he pull in real life or something?" then I heard about him dating yet another girl off the internet after me. I was a bit like....:rolleyes: However, I only thought that at the time when I found out as I was upset. Its not what I think now. I was just angry at the time.
I would never ever meet up with anyone off the internet again with the intention of anything more than friendship tbh. Meeting someone off the internet with the intention of something more than friendship was a complete and utter disaster for me. However, we are friends now which is a good thing so something came out of it.I just wasn't ready for another relationship at the time that the whole thing came about as I was still getting over my ex and how he had treated me. I needed "me time". I couldn't see it at the time but its what I needed.
Without meaning to sound big headed, I have no problem pulling people in real life. I can easily meet boys in the real world. However, that doesn't mean that its a bad way of meeting people. It works for some people. It just doesn't work for me.
I've made very good friends who I've met on the internet though. Probably made some friends for life off here.
Yeah, that says to me you actually quite liked him until you found that out and then you were like "ohh, can't be seen with this freeko, I'm going to dump you now you socially inept little internet geek because I'm actually to good for you"
No they're not. You can create whatever character you want on msn, you don't have to be yourself. The same with text messaging. You can fake who you are in person but it's not as easy as your body language is on show. I have met a few cool friends off the internet but I would still be dubious if somebody had chatted me up over msn beforehand.
I think that the idea of meeting people online is becoming less of a "sad" thing to do, but again... At least in my opinion I wouldn't want to be with somebody who was desperate enough for a relationship that they joined a dating site or flirted with me online before meeting me. It's harsh I know... If you meet a mate online and it developes in to love then cool...
For sure, there are a lot of predators out there... But a lot of people open themselves up more online to a stranger.
Yeah, but the bit you've got around your neck is that everybody on a dating site or everybody who chats to someone of the opposite sex on the internet is 'Desperate for a relationship'. Some people join these things for a bit of fun, or a bit of an alternative way of meeting new people, or some people do it because they find it hard to chat to the opposite sex when they first meet in public or something - It doesn't mean the're all sad desperate losers who cry themselves to sleep every night because the're so desperate to get hitched for the rest of their lives...
im of the differing oppinion to a lot of other people, i'd prefer to meet someone IRL asap, i just feel that you can get a better grasp of the person face to face, than through txt.
but its all good.
It is easier to fabricate a personality online, because there isn't the same level of physical interaction, and context is lost, but I don't necessarily think that means everyone is a predator. Many people will have overstated personalities online because they are much freer from social constraints, but that isn't always a bad thing.
I do see where you're coming from, though, and I do find the faceparty pervs pretty pathetic. But then I think the meat market is pathetic too, and thats all faceparty is.
You are probably thinking of bomberman444
He was my ex of three years. I didn't meet him off here though and he no longer uses these message boards. I met him in college.
Not many people knew about me and this guy who I referred to above. He isn't necessarily off here either.
I'm not saying that everybody is a predator, but I do believe that it is easier for predators to get to somebody... Especially if they were vulnerable, painfully shy or over-trusting. It isn't always a bad thing, it is each to their own (but so far hasn't been for me) and it is sad that some people are so busy they have to resort to it.
But yeah... Meat market, either online or in real life is sad.
i wasnt actually, i was thinking of someone with the name similar to a biscuit...
im not gonna say it cos its not fair.
We are all allowed to state our opinions on here - within reason. That means without being rude and offending others.
You can be honest, just not rude, please be considerate of other peoples' feelings and be careful with your language.
Thanks
I agree with that, and the problem with the internet is that there quite a few vulnerable people on here, so it makes the problem appear more exaggerated.
the only thing i would think was a bit odd is if thats the ONLY place someone could meet their friends or partners, as if they lack the social skills to also do it in real life.