Showing interest via text?

Former Member

;Is it even possible? Surely messages that the sender is writing without any flirtacious language can be taken on board by the reciever as flirty if he/she fancies the other person.

Is it ever possible to ensure someone that you fancy isn't just being themselves when you recieve a text msg? This thread was inspired by someone commenting on that "most agonising" thread about how the girl kept him waiting etc. Are people maybe just reading a little too deeply into text msgs sometimes, especially with all :flirt: these horrible wee things floating about.

Was just curious, because now I'm wondering if guys that are my friends ever construe my msgs as being flirty, when I'm really just being polite and make jokes.

Former Member

I think you've got to look more at the reason for them contacting you, rather than exactly what's in the message. Like if you're getting messages off someone you met in a club, chances are they're flirting. If it's a friend, then you'd look for them suddenly changing the way they're texting. Like maybe they only used to text you to see if you're going out, or to make actual plans, and suddenly they start texting you out of the blue with "what are you up to" type texts. But then if it's someone you see quite a lot, then you wouldn't be basing it on texts anyway.

If it's someone you've just met and got the number of, and you're the one texting them, then it's a bit harder. I'd say one easy way to tell would be to chat for a bit via text, then finish the conversation with "text me if you're out this weekend." Then just wait to see if they text you this weekend.

Former Member

It seems i always read more into my ex's texts then i should have, but half the time they were flirty and half the time they were complainy about something.

Former Member

sometimes people just see what they want to see.

Former Member

Yep it can happend, years ago I got a girl via text... well I knew her already, but all the flirting was via text... so can happend...

Former Member

i have a self confidence problem so if i think someone if flirting with me in text or otherwise i automatically think that im reading too much into it so i always think that they arent flirting with me

Former Member

otter wrote:

sometimes people just see what they want to see.

Well, of course :yes:

I'm very flirty and like a bit of banter with loads of people via text, I hope they aren't all reading too much into it else I'll be getting a reputation for myself!

I don't read anything into texts because I'm a forthght person, and if I did want to go out with them/jump their bones then they'd know about it. So I guess I have the same attitude with texts I receive and the way people behave towards me, subtle flirting is too much like an effort

Former Member

Shitehawke wrote:

i have a self confidence problem so if i think someone if flirting with me in text or otherwise i automatically think that im reading too much into it so i always think that they arent flirting with me

If you think someone is flirting with you then they nearly always are flirting with you. Thats what I find anyway.

Saying that though, flirting doesn't always mean that they fancy you or want to have sex or a relationship with you. Sometimes flirting is just flirting...well it is for me anyway.

ETA: I'm not talking about text flirting just flirting in general

Former Member

flirting is something im not very good at at all im afraid i always feel way in over my head with it