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Really silly, but I've forgotten how to flirt!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
First of all I apologise for how stupid this post is going to sound, but I really need some advice so what the hell...
Basically a couple of weeks ago this sales guy came into work, selling post office home phone or something.
He noticed me and came over, looked at me a bit, I got all shy and blushed (hate it when people stare...) and eventually he came up to me, trying to sell me his home phone package thing. Anyway I said no, then he suddenly said "are you single?" I said yes then he did that thing that all guys do..."oh really?!" looking all shocked etc. Then he asked me out for a drink. It put me on the spot and I thought it was just an extreme sales technique so I said no and he went back to his spot at the other side of the store. Then a colleague came up to me. She said that he'd told her the only reason he came over to me was to ask me out. He did genuinely like me, Anyway since then we've flirted a bit, but he';s never mentioned going out for a drink or anything.
Now I've realised I like him, but I'm not sure if he's still interested in me or likes my supervisor Alison (who he spent most of today chatting to - pretty much all he said to me was that I'd ignored him!) - or if he's just a generally flirty guy.
How do I tell?! And how do I let him know I like him without being too obvious? I've totally forgotten how to flirt!
Basically a couple of weeks ago this sales guy came into work, selling post office home phone or something.
He noticed me and came over, looked at me a bit, I got all shy and blushed (hate it when people stare...) and eventually he came up to me, trying to sell me his home phone package thing. Anyway I said no, then he suddenly said "are you single?" I said yes then he did that thing that all guys do..."oh really?!" looking all shocked etc. Then he asked me out for a drink. It put me on the spot and I thought it was just an extreme sales technique so I said no and he went back to his spot at the other side of the store. Then a colleague came up to me. She said that he'd told her the only reason he came over to me was to ask me out. He did genuinely like me, Anyway since then we've flirted a bit, but he';s never mentioned going out for a drink or anything.
Now I've realised I like him, but I'm not sure if he's still interested in me or likes my supervisor Alison (who he spent most of today chatting to - pretty much all he said to me was that I'd ignored him!) - or if he's just a generally flirty guy.
How do I tell?! And how do I let him know I like him without being too obvious? I've totally forgotten how to flirt!
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Comments
You don't have to flirt. Just tell him the truth - that your first instinct was that he was working up to another sales pitch the other day, and you'd like to buy him a pint to make up for being a tad dim
Don't worry about flirting - just go with the flow. Don't even try to flirt. Just try to have fun and enjoy yourself - if you get on with him, the flirting happens without any effort whatsoever
How can I tell if he does like me, or whether he's just a flirty kinda person?
he told your collegue he liked you so why not!?
Do it before someone else snatches him up.
The only reason he hasnt asked you again, is becasue he was rejected first time. So just say what Click to see more said, and ask him out
the balls in your court now
What I'm saying though is that if he flirts back I can't tell if he's flirting because he likes me, or flirting because he's the type of person that flirts with everyone just for the sake of it.
And you know that he likes you though... dont you?!
"you know you wanted to go for a drink? Well, I'm not busy tonight so if you fancied popping over to the pub / club (wherever you go) for a drink after work then that would be cool. But if you're busy, that's cool too
Ok that sounded really bad. But theres some advice somewhere on this forum that someone else said which I think sounds good: make the first date not quite a date, like, the kind of thing you'd just do with a mate. Then it opens up the opportunity to get to flirt with him.
If he likes you and you ask him out he's not exactly going to say no, is he? :razz:
But maybe he likes Alison and not me? I don't know...
Will you regret it if he tells you 6 months down the line when he's going out with Alison that he really fancied you but didn't think you were interested?
I would mention that to him but don't want to look jealous...
A friend of mind who's very good at meeting women in clubs/pubs says not to try and chat them up just talk to them.
Kate_342436 - I can see that's the easiest option to go for - direct and all that - but I'm really scared of rejection (I know....I'm such a wuss!). Plus if he said yes, I'd get slightly paranoid that he'd only agreed to humour me :rolleyes:
The sooner you do it the better.
Hi, If u talk 2 this guy as if u would talk 2 a friend, if u like him u will be able 2 tell if he likes u by his body language. Can u giv me an example of a time he has been talking 2 u n u hav tried or wanted 2 flirt? That will help me giv u better advice. (my namez kay by the way!)
Well Kay, the point is that if you dont feel up to flirting, dont try and force it.
Your much better off going and talking to them just being friendly then they might flirt with you and you can respond or you might find out that theyve got a girl/boyfriend already, or you might find out their a nutter.
But most likely theyl be friendly to you have a little chat then go, and its easier to flirt next time, at least youl have got to know them a bit better
Offer to start work early so I end up filling shelves or whatever; when I walk past Dan (the guy I like) he'll say hi, ask how I'm doing- just small talk. I'll answer but as I'm usually busy I usually rush off pretty quickly.
Next time I see him he'll make a point of saying that I never talk to him (last week he just said "I won't wind you up today", which mad me feel bad as he obviously thought he was annoying me!)
At 2pm I go on the kiosk which is quite far away from where Dan stands/works.
I see him looking over at me quite a bit but I'm too shy/paranoid of messing things up that I don't go and talk to him. Then he leaves at 4.30ish.
I've noticed that on the days he knows I'm working he'll leave later than when I'm not there (or he hasn't seen me), but not sure if it's coincidence.
And that's my problem; I'm physically incapable of flirting! Lol.
If he does say anything remotely flirty I either laugh it off or ignore it (change the subject) - I'm just sooo bad at it!
I'll be seeing hi again tomorrow so does anyone have any tips on flirting? It needs to be subtle, but obvious enough that he'll know I like him
I think you're cool. Wanna go out sometime?
More aggresive:
Hi. You can pick me up at 7pm Thurs Night - here's my address (hand card / napkin) - and take me out somewhere to eat - your treat!
lol
Well... it depends what kind of person you are but I would edge towards lots of giggling, play fighting (banter not throwing any actual punches) and touching of his arm in a "oh shut up (touch arm) you *giggle *giggle"
I'll try the giggly, girly thing - the stupid thing is, I can do that no problem with guys I don't like, but as soon as I start to fancy a bloke all flirting abilities go out the window, and I end up coming across as really sullen!
So frustrating :rolleyes:
Well I'm so far removed from a bimbo and a bit of flirty banter has never gone wrong for me. I pretty much just tell people when I fancy them though, or ask them out (after I've flirted for a little while)
Don't do anything that you are going to feel silly or uncomfortable doing though because that just wont be a nice experience at all for you and will come across forced.
Light touching on his arm can be subtle while you are talking.
I get the impression you work in a supermarket (might be wrong thought you said kiosk and it reminded me of a supermarket) so how about stroking a baguette in front of him, he find that a turn on
Pmsl...ok if all my other flirting attempts fail miserably, I may have to resort to stroking a baguette...but hopefully not!
I was thinking of asking him out, but I normally only do that if I'm sure the guy likes me - and I don't know if he does or not.
But anyway I'll give the flirting a go and see what happens
Maybe I could make a bit more of an effort to talk though
Good plan!
If you don't want it to actually ask him out on a date yet why don't you arrange a work night out and invite him obviously?