confused boyfriend..

Former Member

i have been with my boyfriend for a year this Sunday. everything was fine.. until a week ago. firstly, he said that he didn't want things to be so serious. (note that, he was the first one to say i love you BEFORE we were even together, he was the first one to talk about the future, the first one to mention marriage, blah blah blah) next i found out he had been texting another girl behind my back, although he swears it was totally innocent. i wouldn't care, except that he denied it and told lies about it. the past few days i've been a wreck, nervy, teary, and insomniac (henceme awake now at 3.30 am having a cup of tea, a fag and haribo)

he says he is confused, and i have to give him til Saturday night to make his mind up, though he won't specify exactly what but says he isn't going to dump me, although I don't know how far to believe this.

I'm so messed up I have no idea what I'm doing..

Former Member

Haribo make me hyper.

Anyways - from what you've said, it sounds like he may have something with the other girl, if he was keeping it a secret from you. Or maybe there is something else. In what way does he say he is confused?

Former Member

nah, he hasn't even met her.. i spoke to her and she said it was all innocent, and he has promised, and i do believe him..

something to do with being less serious.. he won't tell me anything though.

haribo make me feel sick, my eyes are already drying up lol, i dunno whether to attempt to go back to bed.

Former Member

Gotcha - sorry, I'm a bit hazy so had to ask.

I guess there's not much else you can do except wait to see what he says. If this waiting around is affecting you badly, then perhaps you should let him know that.

Haribo don't help you sleep, either! Talking of which, I'm off. Sorry my advice is not of much use - but hope things sort themselves out soon.

Take care

Maccy D

Former Member

Mac Sami wrote:

If this waiting around is affecting you badly, then perhaps you should let him know that.

Yes, I agree, he should be aware of the emotional state he is putting you in. From personal experience waiting around for the other person to make up their mind ends up being pretty damaging to the relationship eventually. Sometimes its inevitable to take some time - but it has to be as short as possible, otherwise the damage can be permanent.... sorry I'm not being too optimistic. Just tell him how this situation is making you feel, so it's not prolongued unnecessarily.

Former Member

So how did it go, if you don't mind my asking?