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If she wanted to go then its completely different to being dragged there.
For many rape victims the police station is the last place they want to go.
Anyway, I don't want to sidetrack from the OP. The OP should follow what kaff has said, basically.
I will explain in a little more detail just so you understand:
The reason I said I (as in me) FELT (as in ME not her) she (her) blames me is because I (me once again) did not STOP her (the girl) from going out that night. This was online btw as we are a few 100 miles apart. Once it happened, she didnt want me to come see her and she was grateful that she went to the police with her best mate. I didnt force anything, I dont even know if she was lieing or not, why dont you ask before you assume you fuckwit. Sorry to invade the topic but its harsh when people assume like this its just totally unfair.
you really need to decide if you really want to be with her and really love her, or if this is just a phase and you can't really be bothered to put the time and energy into it, and i wouldn't blame you if you can't bothered (not the best word) because it is really difficult.
but if you do want to be with her then take things at her pace, and set some ground rules, like actually saying that going off with other people isn't fair on the other person. sounds stupid, but sometimes people need to hear it before it takes effect.
and most of all, don't force her to do anything she doesn't want to do. it sounds as though she has a lot of baggage, and yes she needs to deal with it but encourage her to get help, don't force.
hope this helps.
Not really.
You were having a whine and a whinge about how badly-treated you were, and I said that she probably wasn't particularly unjustified in being pretty pissed off with you for "making" her go down the cop shop. Like you said you did, after all.
Fine. But you don't have to physically drag someone somewhere to end up forcing them, y'know.
How else should I take the sentence I...made her go to the police?
Because that sounds like you took it as your duty to "be there for her" by persuading and nagging her until she went to the cop shop. Very misguided if that's what you did. I know- from experience, I might add- that a lot of victims of rape don't want to ever go near the police station.
If you didn't put pressure on her at all, and I misunderstood what you said, then sorry. I'm a terrible nasty man, etc etc.
People read what you say and expect that you are saying what you mean. I don't know you and don't especially care enough to go into great depth investigating what you're saying and making sure it's what you mean; if you don't mean something don't say it. And part of the written word is that if you aren't careful there will be misunderstandings, that's life, deal with it instead of going off on one. I'm not a mind-reader, y'know.
Apologies to the OP btw.