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Uncle & Niece - Limits?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
My friend is 27. His niece (his, much older, half brother's daughter) is 16. They've always had a close uncle/niece relationship - he's always been the one who's hand she's held as they've gone on family outings as she's been growing up and now they often share a sofa, leaning on each other when watching tv or a film.
Just lately, she seems to have 'taken a shine to him' in a different manner, and has kissed him several times as they've been watching tv and once when she went into his room to wake him up. Thing is, he's not exactly stopped her immediately either..
I've told him time and time again that it's wrong (isn't it?!) and that he wouldn't live much longer if his brother found out, but he still won't stop seeing her. I've told him to distant himself from her etc etc.
Any more advice or thoughts?
I need something to make him see sense!!
Just lately, she seems to have 'taken a shine to him' in a different manner, and has kissed him several times as they've been watching tv and once when she went into his room to wake him up. Thing is, he's not exactly stopped her immediately either..
I've told him time and time again that it's wrong (isn't it?!) and that he wouldn't live much longer if his brother found out, but he still won't stop seeing her. I've told him to distant himself from her etc etc.
Any more advice or thoughts?
I need something to make him see sense!! 0
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Comments
Ah ha, thank you! I thought it must have a name or something!
Oh yes, it was more than just on the cheek!
Sorry ... I have nothing constructive to say
Yep its incest, she is a blood relative after all, hell I wouldn't even act like that with my non-blood relatives.
:yuck:
Oh well, its all a bit creepy to me. x
I don't think you can marry them/have a relationship if you have lived together when you were younger as brother and sister, but say your parents split up and remarried when you were like 20 or something and you just happend to take a shine to your parents parteners kid, thats all legal and what not, but i'm not 100% sure.
Here's TheSite's lowdown on fancying a family member.
It is incest because its "half" uncle and not "step" uncle.
Basically "half"uncle means the two brothers share 1 parent. A "step" uncle would mean the two brothers would instead mean 1 parents from each married.
So, half uncle means they are blood related.
its interesting as a woman I know who I talk to on the next had sex with her uncle and another girl on a confessions website admitted to sleeping with her uncle. In these cases they thought it wa sok, tho they did both keep it secret obviously as it was taboo and family wouldnt approve.
The whole thing about incest is weird. I mean in the case of biological reproduction its worng, because it produces deftective offspring. Although we are always being told nowadays that sex isn't about or just about reproduction.
religion dictated alot of our sexual taboos, although interestingly in the Bible, incest between father and daughter goes unpunished.
the girl is 16, legal age and the guy is 27, big age gap but not like he's an old man and plenty of people on here hav ebeen champoining big age gaps.
I guess its their decision although legally I am sure it probably is illegal.
I dont agree with the new law that makes relations between step bors/sis illegal mind.
Yeah I know, thats what I was saying. I was going off topic a bit because of something katralla said, I just never thought of incest as being non-blood relatives too.
I read the link Helen posted and it seems in some circumstances 'steps' are out of bounds too, see I learn something new every day here!lol.
But like I said before I just can't imagine get kinky with any family members, step, half, or full blood anyway. :yuck:
Step-relatives may marry provided they are at least 21 years of age. The younger of the couple must at no time before the age of 18 have lived in the same household as the older person. Neither must they have been treated as a child of the older person's family.
Uhoh :nervous:
Some people never truely accept their step relatives as being relatives and therefore it makes sense that they could marry.
But then sometimes things are just weird and stuff with step-brothers and sisters. With my step-brother he wanted me in that way and thought that us not being blood relatives made it okay. But until then I had thought of him as my brother. It confused me the whole situation really.
Obviously marriage doesn't actually come into it, but it still gives me proof that the whole thing's wrong!
And it is okay to marry your adoptive brothers and sisters (which is surprising given the step-brother/ step-sister laws as you would think the same logic applies)
We all live in incest risk society.
I mean how many millions of anyomous sperm donation shas there been and anyomous adoptions?? How do you or anyone know i fthey could be getting it on with a relative?
take me. My mums biological father left when she was young and we never stayed in touch with his family. Last year or the year before my granmother did get back in touch with them and we met my mothers father, his brother and his son. My grandfathers, brothers son told me that I have hundres of cousins all over leeds and the uk. Now due to some incidences we have no lost touch aain with that side of the family.
But I could go out on the town or wherever, pull g agirl or even fall for her and be having a relationship with ehr and she might be my cousin. I wouldnt know at all.
Its all a risk.
Wasn't there an epidsode of Kilroy where they did blood relations having relationships??
Incest is taboo but I rekcon its more common then people think.
Are they not tightly wrapped? Fair enough he may not feel like a son....but he is! And 15 years younger...just :no: :yuck:
If you're on about the article I think you're talking about - didn't they get done for this or something?
That's just sick and wrong - I wonder how many of their relatives are talking to them now...
It's not sick, but it is wrong and it is illegal. It's often found, two people feel very close to each other because of being relations, and when in the adult this feeling can often be interpreted as sexual because for most adults intimacy = sex.
If you haven't lived as family, then natural barriers to incest are not formed in the brain. So when you meet someone who is very similar to you, you like them and want to be intimate with them, and that feeling can be interpreted as sexual. People often fancy people who look like them, and who looks more like you than family?
He does need to keep away from her until it passes, if he cannot trust himself to not do something he would regret for a very very long time. It's not really his fault, its not her fault, and it is understandable, but it cannot be allowed to happen.