hand job and blow job both hurt...

Former Member

my girlfirend and i took a big step today.

but i am afraid that i ruined it all. She tried to give me a hand job but it didn't feel good, actually it was just sort of numb like she was touching me with clothing inbetween (which she was not). When i told her that it wasn't really doing anything she started to go down on me and it didn't get much better, i could not feel anything at all, and after about 5 minutes i told her that i couldn't. And that she was great but i couldn't feel anything.

It was not her fault, but what did i do wrong? Why did that happen. I had quite the erection (a *very* big and pokey one) before we started with it. Could that be why? Any tips for the future?

Former Member

also when i masturbate it usually does not take more than 5 mins. and it should take a lot less time if my girlfriend is doing it for me. right?

Former Member

your girlfriend needs to be more gentler. She should also massage your balls etc and slowly tug and then gently but firmly speed up. Your erection has nothing to do with it.But comfort your girlfriend, she might really blame herself and may think you dont like it anymore. Just talk to her.

Former Member

It's all about the foreplay. If she just goes straight into it then you probably won't be as aroused.

She doesn't know what stimulates you the most... you know all the right spots, when to go faster, when to slow down, how much pressure to apply... all this is totally weird to girls!

I remember the first hand job I gave completely freaked me out, my ex had to make me stop. Now I feel more comfortable doing it and the more comfortable I am, the more I pay attention to what's turning my boyfriend on and what isn't.

Just tell her what you like, show her what to do... maybe put your hand over hers and guide her a little. Make sure you tell her that it's ok, it's not her fault. Maybe some lotion to lubricate you would help.

(Does it usually take guys 5 minutes to come when masturbating? If I feel like it I cancome in a minute max, or in 20 minutes...)

Former Member

Definitely guide her hand and let her know if she's doing it right or not. I remember giving a hand job and i only started because he PUT my hand there and I continually stopped cos I just didn't know if he was enjoying it and it was continually put back. I dunno maybe he liked it!