Open the door!

BillieTheBot

I know this is a very old subject, but I think it's still valid today...

Question for the women: When a guy holds open a door for you, what do you think? Do you reckon "that's very polite of you, thank you" or "patronising sexist bastard"?

I'm only asking as recently I had the misfortune to hold open a door for a "wrong 'un". She proceeded to go on a foul-mouthed (and most unladylike ) rant about how much of a sexist pig I apparantly was and how I was somehow responsible personally for thousands of years of "female oppression". Is this how women really think?

Former Member

if it's some random stranger then i tend to think it's nice that they do it. but if it's someone i know i'll just be like really, you don't have to do that. i hold doors open for people too though y'know, and it doesn't mean i'm being 'a patronising sexist bastard'.

littlemissy

I always think "That is very polite of you."

I will always hold a door open for someone, male or female, child or elderly etc. It is only good manners.

I think that woman was completely rude.

Former Member

I hold the door open for anyone, if there are people behind me, I'll let them through before me (unless I'm really late for something). I'm just nice like that.

If someone holds a door for me, I just think it's polite, no matter who it is.

Former Member

i always hold doors open for people

i hate it when people go out of a door in front of me and just let it shut, tis so rude

Former Member

I don't know where I saw it, someone said something like, "I held a door open for a woman last night and she said "I don't need you to help me just because I'm a woman" so the chappy said "madam, just because you're not a lady it doesn't mean that I shall stop being a gentleman"". - it was probably you who said it to be honest stargalaxy..

And that's how I think of it. I will hold doors open because I believe that it's the right think to do. I don't care whether it's a man or a woman who will come through the door next, I can't really imagine that either of them would prefer to have the door slam shut into their face.

And well, frankly, if you don't want the door held open for you, then after you've taken it from me you can always shut if yourself before you walk through, no?

Former Member

I think that it is polite and good manners, whoever holds the door open. I also hold the door open for other people, because I was brought up to do so.

Former Member

Mist wrote:

I don't know where I saw it, someone said something like, "I held a door open for a woman last night and she said "I don't need you to help me just because I'm a woman" so the chappy said "madam, just because you're not a lady it doesn't mean that I shall stop being a gentleman"". - it was probably you who said it to be honest stargalaxy..

:chin:

Former Member

stargalaxy wrote:

I'm only asking as recently I had the misfortune to hold open a door for a "wrong 'un". She proceeded to go on a foul-mouthed (and most unladylike ) rant

It's happened to me, I was quite upset about it. Fortunately, now we live in the 21st century this is largely a non-issue - most places I encounter random people have doors that open themselves.

Former Member

Mist wrote:

And well, frankly, if you don't want the door held open for you, then after you've taken it from me you can always shut if yourself before you walk through, no?

I can just imagine someone doing that. Oh lordy *wipes tear from eye*.

Former Member

I always hold doors open for people.

With my gf's I always walk ahead and hold the door for them as they walk through, my ex used to rush ahead and do the same for me when we next came up to a door, I thought that was nice!

Teh_Gerbil

I can just imagine someone doing that. Oh lordy *wipes tear from eye*.

Sadly so can i.

I try to hold the door open for anyone I can, its a nice politce jesture.

If you dont like it, your problem your a grumy sod...

Former Member

It's simply good manners, just asI hold doors open for people.

Former Member

I like it when my boyfriend does it, makes me feel all girly and protected or something silly.

Former Member

I hold doors open, never been called up about it though.

Former Member

If a woman started preaching about equality when i held a door open for her i'd punt her handbag and any other possesions over the nearest Telegraph pole.

Former Member

Doofay wrote:

Telegraph pole.

Were you in WWII?
(I'm just kidding around)

littlemissy

Doofay wrote:

If a woman started preaching about equality when i held a door open for her i'd punt her handbag and any other possesions over the nearest Telegraph pole.

Well, exactly. It is just bad manners to go off on one over something as silly and trivial as this.

Former Member

I don't really see holding the door open as a girl/boy thing anymore. I just see it as a general curtiousiness (get what word i'm trying to get at there?) When I'm out on a date, if i get to the door before my boyfriend does, then i hold it for him, as is the other way around. I'll hold it for strangers and i find it very polite when strangers hold it for me. I dont wait around for some guy to open the door for me nor would i care if some guy did it because he thought he aught to. Its just a nice thing to do, no matter who you are or who you are holding it for.

Unless I open the door, sneak in and quickly shut it while my boyfriends or dads hand or somebody is like inside the door but the rest is out. Thats just funny, then i laugh.

Former Member

my_name wrote:

I don't really see holding the door open as a girl/boy thing anymore. I just see it as a general curtiousiness (get what word i'm trying to get at there?)

:yes:

it's just polite. man, woman, beast, if i have an open door and someone behind me wanting to go through it, i'm hardly going to shut it in their face.

Former Member

that woman was obviously a complete bitch.

I'd hold a door open for anybody who happens to be near or behind me. It doesn't cost a thing to be polite and there is no excuse for bad manners.

Former Member

mystifymysoul wrote:

It doesn't cost a thing to be polite and there is no excuse for bad manners.

Oh I totally agree.

I dislike also though, when you do do something nice as hold the door open or anything like that, the people who just walk right thru it and ignore you.

A thank you is always appropiate. Maybe I'm just a bitch, but I find it rude when people do not say thank you, even for small matters like that.

Former Member

Doofay wrote:

If a woman started preaching about equality when i held a door open for her i'd punt her handbag and any other possesions over the nearest Telegraph pole.

of course you would, dirty manc :P

Former Member

it's simply good manners to hold the door open.

Former Member

In Russia, no-one holds doors open for anyone

Indrid Cold

As others have said, I hold doors open for a person who's right behind me regardless of their sex. I usually let go though, if a couple of seconds afterwards they're not at the door yet.

That woman really had some issues. Perhaps her brother stole her pacifier when she was a baby.

Former Member

my_name wrote:

curtiousiness (get what word i'm trying to get at there?)

Courtesy.

And I concur. I hold doors for boys and girls, never had a complaint. Normally a mumbled thanks or a quick 'ta'.

Former Member

Should have slammed the door in the bitch's face - she obviously didn't deserve it.

Reminds me of when I used to work at Tesco and I'd just got off work and was filling up the car at the petrol station (obviously). I rekon the problem was that I still had my Tesco shirt on but I was just going into the shop bit to pay when I saw a guy on the forecourt coming in aswell. He was carrying his little boy in his arms so I thought I'd be nice to him and hold the door. The fucker walked slowly and then completely blanked me as he passed me. Not a word or even an aknowledgement came my way.

I swear his kid was the one who saved him because were it not for his kid, that twat would have got a faceful of door in seconds flat.


I do think a lot of people are losing their manners. For me, they are very important. That's not to say that I lift my little finger when drinking or anything silly like that but things like letting women pass through doors etc. first and holding doors open for whomever. Little things like that don't cost shit but some people just can't be bothered and it makes me sad because if such things continue, we'll lose our reputation as the politest nation in the world which, after years of travelling, we still have.

Just like when I used to work at the pub and, if I was having a bad day, I would refuse service to people who didn't say please.

silverberg wrote:

In Russia, no-one holds doors open for anyone

Bullshit! Have you ever been to Russia?? Plus a slight generalisation for a country spanning 11 time zones and containing 150 million people.

Former Member

Thunderstruck wrote:

I do think a lot of people are losing their manners. For me, they are very important.

Lynne Truss, (who wrote "Eats shoots and leaves") has just released another book "Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of Everyday Life (or Six Good Reasons to Stay Home and Bolt the Door)", which pretty much says the same thing. She, however, is getting lots of money to say it.

Former Member

its good manners and its caring and its being respectful. I love it as it doesnt happen that often anymore and when it does i always say ''thank you thats very nice of you'' hoping that it will continue.

people rarely say thankyou let alone hold doors open.

Former Member

When it comes to opening doors and saying thank you, people do it more often than not. But maybe thats just cuz we're a friendly people But rudeness is definatly prevailing. Especially when driving. Or shopping, like the retards that walk slowly with their thousand children running around rampant and not moving out of the way for decent people. God I hate malls.