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eating comments
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Well i was going to put this in health but since i don't actually have a question about my health i thought it would be more suited to this area.
I was a bridesmaid at a friends wedding on sat and got into a rather heated arguement with my best friends mum and she was really quite rude and abusive towards me and i had to go off and sit on my own for a bit as she upset me quite badly (mainly because of the drink i think).
Basically she started making ally mcbeal comments in the toilets to me and i asked her to explain what she meant. She explained that ally mcbeal is all bone and so am i. I got quite mad to be honest and told her that i was fed up of her insinuating that i had an eating problem and that she was being quite rude and offensive by making comments. She then got really abusive and started shouting out about how i've got an eating disorder and i've got real mental problems etc. and i tried calmly to tell her that no i hadnt and that i've been a size 8 since i was 16. To which she started swearing etc and i just lost my rag, told her to f*** off and get a grip and walked off.
Later on she turned round to my boss and told her that i deserved a smack and if i said anything to her she was going to "batter me" <-- grown up lady this one. My boss asked her why and she said "well she's got an eating disorder, look at her". My boss knows full well i eat properly and told her so. So she does no more than turns round and says "oh it's not anorexia it's bulimia, she throws up all the time, i know everything there is to know about anyone"
So i asked my friend to have a word and she does no more than says oh she's always on about it at home, i happen to think she has a point!
I shouldn't really be surprised or still wound up but for the last couple of months i've had comments off mates about my weight basically along the lines of get a good meal down your neck, oh you're lost too much weight etc. and i'm just fed up and i just want them to stop now. I have never been a big boned person and have always been about 8 - 8 1/2 stone since 16. I am thin yes, but it's muscle and not bone as i do a lot of sport and training as i enjoy being fit. I don't really eat fried / takeaway food as i have ibs so it really makes me ill but people see this as a problem???
So basically after my rather large rant above i suppose what i am asking is how the hell do you cope with this. It's just starting to grind me down now as it's quite embarrassing when others start to hear the comments and then tut and look at me as if i'm ill or something. :no: What gets me is this woman's daughter (my best mate) always goes on about how she used to have bulimia etc. so it really does take the piss to be honest.
*breathe* sorry
I was a bridesmaid at a friends wedding on sat and got into a rather heated arguement with my best friends mum and she was really quite rude and abusive towards me and i had to go off and sit on my own for a bit as she upset me quite badly (mainly because of the drink i think).
Basically she started making ally mcbeal comments in the toilets to me and i asked her to explain what she meant. She explained that ally mcbeal is all bone and so am i. I got quite mad to be honest and told her that i was fed up of her insinuating that i had an eating problem and that she was being quite rude and offensive by making comments. She then got really abusive and started shouting out about how i've got an eating disorder and i've got real mental problems etc. and i tried calmly to tell her that no i hadnt and that i've been a size 8 since i was 16. To which she started swearing etc and i just lost my rag, told her to f*** off and get a grip and walked off.
Later on she turned round to my boss and told her that i deserved a smack and if i said anything to her she was going to "batter me" <-- grown up lady this one. My boss asked her why and she said "well she's got an eating disorder, look at her". My boss knows full well i eat properly and told her so. So she does no more than turns round and says "oh it's not anorexia it's bulimia, she throws up all the time, i know everything there is to know about anyone"
So i asked my friend to have a word and she does no more than says oh she's always on about it at home, i happen to think she has a point!
I shouldn't really be surprised or still wound up but for the last couple of months i've had comments off mates about my weight basically along the lines of get a good meal down your neck, oh you're lost too much weight etc. and i'm just fed up and i just want them to stop now. I have never been a big boned person and have always been about 8 - 8 1/2 stone since 16. I am thin yes, but it's muscle and not bone as i do a lot of sport and training as i enjoy being fit. I don't really eat fried / takeaway food as i have ibs so it really makes me ill but people see this as a problem???
So basically after my rather large rant above i suppose what i am asking is how the hell do you cope with this. It's just starting to grind me down now as it's quite embarrassing when others start to hear the comments and then tut and look at me as if i'm ill or something. :no: What gets me is this woman's daughter (my best mate) always goes on about how she used to have bulimia etc. so it really does take the piss to be honest.
*breathe* sorry
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Comments
I'd be more upset that your friend didn't back you up, to be quite honest.
I think its probably a touch of the green eyed monster.
I totally agree with this.
You shouldn't be forced to change your eating habits or anything due to these hurtful comments. The best option is to just ignore the silly woman. You can't help the fact that you are skinnier than she is. Or that you are naturally slim. Maybe she just finds it hard to believe. She should apologise to you for making you feel so upset. What does her daughter (your friend) have to say on the matter? Has she actually said she thinks the same as her mother? Just ignore them.
it probably is nothing more than a spot of jealousy, but there are quite a few people around who think that all the world's ills come down to you being a couple of stone lighter than them. and i think it's horrific to accuse you of having a disease just because you are slim.
it's one thing to have your granny's misguided but well-meaning 'there's nothing to you/have to run around in the shower to get wet/ might lose you down the drain' but this woman seems to have got really vicious with you.
did you mean your mate used to have bulimia, or her mum did. if it was her mum, then it kind of makes sense. eating disordered people tend to be fiercely competitive about their weight, so she is just angry that you are 'winning'.
i'd be having words with your mate though, big style. she agrees with her mum attacking you because of your natural body shape? nice.
When I started reading the post I thought "Uh oh, arguing with your friend's mum, not good" but sounds like she was being a twat and deserved what she got.
As she's created a new version of events is your relationship OK with your mate?
She probably commented constantly about your mate's weight and made her feel like a fat girl, triggering her eating disorder. However that is just speculation.
Just stay outta her way.
ok, so if we give her the benefit of the doubt and say she's not a total nob, is it possible she was upset about her daughter's eating problems, and (in a somewhat fucked up way) is trying to stop you going down the same path?
She's ignoring me now anyway so it's all worked out quite well