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Can you ever regain trust in a relationship??
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
is this possible?? If a guy you had been with for a couple of years lied thru the back teeth to your face on a number of occasions. Can you ever learn to trust him ever again?? Can you ever rebuild the trust or is it definately gone forever?? Thats my pet hate, i can not stand liars around me, then i realise im in a realtionship with the biggest one of all.
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if someone lies and lies and lies to you, and then you forgive him, what is to stop him lying again in the future? unless he had a bloody good reason to lie, surely the minimum requirement for a relationship is a level of trust, and of honesty?
If they're big lies, or lots and lots of pointless little lies, then no, I wouldn't trust.
As a generic answer, and speaking from a personal point of view (as to what I'd do) I'd say I wouldn't be able to build up trust again once it had been broken. It seems a dreadful shame to just cut your losses on a relationship and a man that you've spent time and energy getting to know/presumably love. But in reality if he was lying consistently to you throughout then how genuine is the relationship, and is it worth all the heartache?
If there's no trust in a relationship there doens't seem much point as you'll always be worrying about whether he's lying again.
I know. ive told him i cant believe a word that comes out of his mouth anymore,its sooo fucked up!
You've tried to leave him, now it's time to make it clear. Tell him to stop bothering you.
Once damage has been healed it is of utmost importance to be truthful and honest with each other. This includes diplomacy, which means that it is however not necessary to tell your partner each tiny little detail of your affair as this only increases the hurt and is not helpful to regain trust.
After a trust breaker your relationship needs time to heal. This means paying attention to your partner and making your relationship the main focus. In certain cases marriage counselling or coaching is a good way to help you get through it.
If you are generally over-promising and under-delivering make sure that you ONLY make promises that you can keep. This is an ultra-sensitive period where you want to deliver what you promise.
Where you might have held back before it is now time to make talking with your partner a priority. Help each other heal from the situation and gently build back your connection.
Even if u think u can trust again your kidding yourself.
Relationships are wholey based on trust and if someone breaks that trust its broken forever . x
But you can , however, give him a chance if he does some treatment to stop lying.