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What would you do if...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This is my first post on this forum...hello to everyone...I don't know if anyone can help me here but you never know...So, what would you do if you were in love with someone famous and you felt you remembered him from previous lifetimes and it took you 10 years to come anywhere close to telling him...and then on the tenth year you start revealing some of your feelings & metaphysical experiences(to do with him) over the Internet...on his official forum...and then on the 11th year you muster up the courage to go and meet him...so you go to his offices(management etc) and you bump into his best friend(let's call him X), so you tell X ''Hi there, I would like to meet your friend...I need to talk to him about...you know,things...any chance?'' And X tells you:
''Oh, I 'm sorry, he's busy promoting his new_______.I don't think he'd have the time...''
''Oh, I see...how about me giving you my mobile number so maybe he could call me when he gets a chance?''
So you give him your number and then...well, he doesn't call you...but ocasionally you do receive anonymous silent calls and you wonder if it was him...
And then, this year, you think it's over...but then in his new_____, he drops hints that make you feel he remembers you too and he kinda acknowledges his love for you...but then you can't be enturely sure it's you because if he felt that way about you, why didn't he ever contact you directly, right?And anyway, if those hints were meant for you, why is he in a relationship with another person?
And so you find yourself in the 12th year...and you 've been praying all along...and you feel needy for a relationship but all these years you have been failing miserably because something in you, something you can't explain, always takes you back to him...but you feel needy and this love fuels all your unhealthy patterns...esp eating disorders...and so you keep overeating esp things that make you feel ill(due to food intolerances) and...
I know it's hard to give me advice when you haven't been thru what I have but I still felt the need to tell you about this...hoping for some kind of positive feedback...These past few days have been really hard...
The most frustrating part is this little voice in me...it keeps telling me to have faith & patience but I feel so out of it right now...
Thank you for your time
''Oh, I 'm sorry, he's busy promoting his new_______.I don't think he'd have the time...''
''Oh, I see...how about me giving you my mobile number so maybe he could call me when he gets a chance?''
So you give him your number and then...well, he doesn't call you...but ocasionally you do receive anonymous silent calls and you wonder if it was him...
And then, this year, you think it's over...but then in his new_____, he drops hints that make you feel he remembers you too and he kinda acknowledges his love for you...but then you can't be enturely sure it's you because if he felt that way about you, why didn't he ever contact you directly, right?And anyway, if those hints were meant for you, why is he in a relationship with another person?
And so you find yourself in the 12th year...and you 've been praying all along...and you feel needy for a relationship but all these years you have been failing miserably because something in you, something you can't explain, always takes you back to him...but you feel needy and this love fuels all your unhealthy patterns...esp eating disorders...and so you keep overeating esp things that make you feel ill(due to food intolerances) and...
I know it's hard to give me advice when you haven't been thru what I have but I still felt the need to tell you about this...hoping for some kind of positive feedback...These past few days have been really hard...
The most frustrating part is this little voice in me...it keeps telling me to have faith & patience but I feel so out of it right now...
Thank you for your time
0
Comments
Sorry I can't be much practical help but I do hope you manage to get some closure on this - it sounds like it's gone on for too long and you need to start living your life. There is someone real out there for you but if you sit around obsessing over a fantasy you'll never find them.
Good luck x
there is no good excuse for putting yourself through purposely making yourself ill, and for something like this ruling your life! even if X is your past love, perhaps if it is true, it is time to realise it is best left in the past?
Harrassment?How is that?I just tried to meet him in person last year for the first time...I 've never been one to hang out outside his houses or stuff like that.
As for therapy, I have had quite a bit over the years.A couple of my therapists suggested to me to try to meet him as well.At the time, I was not ready, the feelings that were coming up were too strong for me...But last year, I managed to get there...I was not lucky enough but at least I did it.
Yes, I know it has been unhealthy for me but I have done a lot to release it and so far I have been unsuccesful...But at the same time, it is not just an attachment...there is love there as well.And because of that, it took me 11 years to approach him.
Ok, you don't really know me as a person and you don't know him either...and there are many many things that happenned in those 12 years that made me feel this guy was really my soulmate.And at the end of the day, you never know...right?Maybe he is but the timing is wrong.But even if he is not, it's been 12 years and I want to make sense out of this experience.I just need to recover my faith in myself & God.
Thank you for the replies.
i don't think that you are really in love with said star ( is it robbie williams?) , but if you prefer to think so then its up to you. im guessing that you really aren't very confident around people in real life and tend to feel quite lonely. maybe it would be a good idea to get out and meet some new people and have some fun until you meet the person and prove us all wrong. or someone else who you can love.
No, it's not Robbie Williams.
I 've always felt in love with his soul...and often wondered if that ''translated'' in me being in love with his ''earthly self''.But then once, I did find myself in the same room as him(long story) and even tho we didn't meet properly, just by looking at him(he couldn't see me), I felt my heart racing.
Yes, I get to feel lonely in real life...I need emotional honesty in order to open up and when I cannot find it, I prefer to spend time on my own.But the main problem is everytime I have tried to be in a relationship with someone else, I feel his ''presence'' around me and eventually, I have to tell the other person there is someone else on my mind...so the relationship goes down the drain.
And then, sometimes(most of the time), when I 've had casual sex in the past 12 years, I 've felt slightly guilty cause...well, I 'm too idealistic when it comes to romantic love...I don't feel good having sex with other men knowing there is this man on my mind...You can call me naive, silly or even screwed up but I feel this sense of out of this world loyalty for him(even tho I often feel angry at the situation) & I 'm just trying to honor that...does anyone understand what I 'm talking about?
Anyways...I know there's a spiritual solution to every problem.There is too much neediness in me right now, that part is deff not healthy.I 'm trying to confront it...it's just that today has been particularly tough...Thank God for this site, I 'm feeling slightly better.
P.S:Yes, whatever happens, I would like to come back here and tell you.
P.P.S:Actually, this is almost funny:It was around this time of the year, 12 years ago when I said a little prayer asking God to show me a great love, the kind of love that makes people trascend themselves, their souls soar, sometimes do crazy things and artists write masterpieces...Well, this guy ''came into my life'' less than 24 hours later!It happenned thru a magazine article I read.There was a picture of him next to it and I couldn't take my eyes off of it!It's weird cause I knew this guy already(he's been famous for a long time) but all of a sudden I felt I was looking at my Twin Soul!I 'm telling you, if I ever get my hands on Cupid, he's toast!!!
i mean, it is normal to fancy celebraties... but this person is not part of your life and never will be unless you force the issue, which it seems like every time you have felt some sort of connection to him, you have been forcing it. you have only seen things which you have wanted to see, not things that are really there. do have a life outside from thinking about this person? or not? it seems like you have developped an unhealthy attatchment to them ........ may be as a way of escaping from something else in your life?!
It wont happen!! And if it does i will eat my own shit!
have to say :yes:
I think I mentioned I 've been in the same room as him but we didn't get to talk...
Yes, he knows I exist.
Ok, look, I came here to share this with you cause today was a really difficult day for me.But there's no point in coming back if people are gonna be abusive.
P.S:I like Otter's signature...yeah, Patience...When you 've tried everything to heal a situation and you 're still suffering, Patience is all you got left...and Faith.
Yeah, it's hard to understand when you haven't been thru it yourself...maybe I would think like you & some of the other people here if I had not had this experience.But there is no need for abuse either.
Btw, if you listen to the lyrics of many songs, you see a lot of artists(those celebrities you say) talking about this kind of love too...you know, the kind that gets you horribly depressed and incredibly needy...and yes, obsessive too at times...but they 're famous so people don't call them ''freaks'' as somebody called me on this thread. :rolleyes:
all credit to the dalai lama.
Good luck, and if you ever need to talk feel free to PM me. xx
They're making money from it. I can write song lyrics but I rarely mean them.
Who is it? You strike me as being middle aged, so it's probably Cliff Richard or something!
Really??I have written some verse I meant every ******* word-pardon my French.
LOL!No, I was born in 1974 but most people think I 'm a decade younger.
Ok.
Most people don't even write their own lyrics, and whatever they write is usually sell records to impressionable people.
How do you know this person knows you exist exactly?
I think it would be inappropriate to say.
No, he writes his own songs.He sings them too.
No he has not replied but then I haven't written all that many to him.And when I did, I didn't say what I wanted to say cause first time, I was not ready and then another time, another fan was present and she was staring at me while I was writing...I felt very uncomfortable...The first letter I 'm not sure he got...sent it at his management offices...But the second one, I gave it to his dad.Did he get it?I believe he did but that's just my feeling...
I have expressed all my feelings online, first on his own official forums(and I 'm sure he was browsing very often, to say the least) and later(this year) on other forums(owned by fans).I believe he 's read that stuff too.He's often admitted to reading fan sites etc.
And I 'm sure his friend told him last year about my visit at his management offices.Also, I spent Xmas 2003 in London with another fan.She was desperate to meet him.At the time, I felt unsure about meeting him myself, I just wanted to give him a Xmas present.So we paid his dad a visit(at work) and we left our presents there.I 'm pretty sure he got those as well.
The thing with liking people you don't really know is you can fill in the stuff you don't know with the things you would like to be there. I liked this guy from afar at uni (he did gigs there) and I had him down to be really soft hearted and kind and loving. I didn't know he was I just filled in the gaps and made him to be perfect in my head. When I got to know him he turned out to be full of himself.
Maybe you're making him out in your mind to be a lot of stuff he isn't. Its easily done Ive done it more than once
Phoenix
But these things do not mean that he knows who you are. I'm not trying to put you down, but it really does seem like you need help for an unhealthy obsession. It is such a shame that you can't actually recognise it as this yet. I hope you become aware, as it will be incredibly difficult to help you if you don't realise it's a problem. Good luck.
Thanks, I need all the luck I can get.
Of course I recognize it's been unhealthy.That's why I had therapy for it.That's why I talk to people about it, that's why I came here to post about it.But it being unhealthy doesn't mean the feelings were not real.
As for him...well, he's had emotional problems thruout his life as well.He's very aware and sometimes I feel that's one of the reasons he wouldn't want to approach me.In a way, that's very responsible of him.But it hurts to see all those weird hints in his lyrics.Cause even if they are not meant for me, they are not meant for his current partner either, that's for sure.And I 'm not the only one to have noticed so.
It would help greatly if I met someone else.And that's been another reason for my anger.I don't know how many of you pray but I do all the time.And I 've often prayed to God asking for release from this situation.I felt that could come thru someone else who shows up into my life...But it hasn't happenned yet and sometimes I 've despaired over it.
Ok, the good news is today I 'm feeling better.Infact, I started feeling better since I started this thread.I feel I 'm being positive.And when you are being like that, something good always comes your way...right?
Oh yes, I have often thought about it in this way too.At the end of the day, if I truly love this man, I have to love him unconditionally and let go of any expectations.Sometimes, I have managed that, but then it all came back.I think that's the lesson:my soul seems to have put me thru this so I could understand what unconditional love is all about.
I think you need all the help you can get. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but there isn't any other way to pussyfoot around it.
This person probably knows you exist to the point that you're just another crazy woman who wants him. He'll have thousands and thousands of fans who want to get with him. He's unlikely to be flattered by those who harrass his dad at work though!
Have you stopped to think about the ossibility that he has a girlfriend anyway?
Not only that, but he'll look upon your actions as more than a little crazy.