am i going crazy?

Former Member

*sorry if you think i'm becoming some what of a troll, i just really need some help because i have no one to talk to at the moment*

i seriously think i'm going crazy. last year i was diagnosed with clinical depresion and i was told that there was no way i was going to get better other than going to psycologist and taking prozac. 5 months on and i've had 3 months depression free, and i'm ok now. but since getting together with my boyfriend i've almost started to go through a manic stage. for the first month or so i was really happy, and felt great. but for the past month i've been obbsessing over him, and i constantly think that i'm playing in a league way over my head. i love him to bits and i know he does back, but the distance between us and our busy-ness (he's a journo and working in york, i'm a uni student in bristol), we seem to leave huge holes in each other. but he just seems to get on with it. me on the other hand has just fallen apart. My life is quite up in the air at the moment and it's difficult to try and keep it all together, but there are just things that maybe i'm reading to much into. like he says just little fly away comments, which i take to heart and they really hurt.

I've just started the pill as well, so i'm wondering if this could have something to do with it?

but you know in cartoons you ahve the little devil telling you things trying to run you into the ground, trying to make you turn completly psyco? well thats what i've got right now. and i know i should go to the doctors, i jsut hate them because they have hardly ever helped me, just hindered me.

I feel so messed up right now, my uni won't help because they say that i am not an urgent enough case (they seem to only help people once they have thrown themselves off the building or been found floating in there own blood. I'm not depressed, my mind just doesn't seem to be able to compute things any more and i'm consistantly worried and stressed, and majorly paranoid....and since my best friend has also just broken up with her boyfriend she's just a pile of tears right now, thus unable to help me....i feel like i should be helping her but i'm not all too sure how much i'd be able to help.

can anyone help me? even my doctor has turned against me and will only offer prozac and instists i am still depressed.

help.....

Former Member

anyone?

Former Member

I think you should go back to your GP, or a different GP if you don't feel comfortable with your own. You should also discuss it with your boyfriend, as he is obviously playing a part too. There's not a great deal else I can suggest.

Here are some articles from theSite.org:
Depression
Depression 2

It does sound like you have some depressive tendencies and abnormal thought patterns - you sort of describe paranoia. You may find counselling useful, and you don't need to go to the uni counsellors if they are being unhelpful.

The pill can certainly affect your mood, and that is also something to discuss with your GP.
COCP Info

Former Member

My real problem is i have a huge fear of doctors.

I'm not depressed (and don't start saying i'm in denial because i'm not either, i love living, jsut find it very hard).

I had a good talk with my friend whos a 3 yr psycology student, and she thinks i need to get something sorted out about my relationship, and try and jsut chill out a bit. I do feel a lot better for just getting it off my chest. I suppose i'm quite isolated because this isn't where i grew up and i have very few friends here, and my work load doesn't exactly help with socialising.

thanks for the reply, helped a lot.

Former Member

deep breath ...breath out ...
you sound remarkably normal for this day and age.
whatever will be will be ...with possibly a little help from you but ...don't overdo things ...in your head.
easier said than done yeah.
practice ...

Former Member

darkshines wrote:

like he says just little fly away comments, which i take to heart and they really hurt.

I've just started the pill as well, so i'm wondering if this could have something to do with it?

I've found I get really really emotional because of the pill... People say the most light-hearted things and it makes me suddenly feel shit. So that could be affecting you too, but I do think you need to see your GP again and explain everything.

Former Member

i will pm you back later ...brain dead at the moment as i've only had a couple of hours kip ...will pm back later though ...promise.

Former Member

It sounds like you really need to talk to someone but don't know who. Like the others said, have you tried a uni counsellor/nurse? I understand that GPs aren't always very approachable but maybe there's another surgery you could go to instead? Failing that, as always, you can always call one of the many excellent helplines that run listening srvices - sometimes all you need to do it get it all out without feeling guilty about talking about yourself for so long! Try one of these - I hope they are useful:

SupportLine
Offers confidential and emotional support on the telephone for children, young adults and adults
020 8554 9004
www.supportline.org.uk

SANELINE
Offers practical information, crisis care and emotional support to anybody affected by mental health problems.
Web: www.sane.org.uk
Tel: 0845 767 8000

Samaritans
Confidential help for anyone who is experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which may lead to suicide.
Telephone: 08457 909090
www.samaritans.org.uk
Email: jo@samaritans.org