Affairs

Former Member

Anyone every had one just for the sex?

Is it possible just to enjoy the sex without getting emtionally involved?

Former Member

People who cheat on their partners are the lowest of the low.

have the decency to end it, or keep your pants on. It's quite simple.

Former Member

if you're not going to be faithful, what's the point in being in a relationship?

if you want to shag around, stay single and shag around.

Former Member

Yer, that's fucked.

Put yourself in your partner's shoes. Ignore the fact that they don't fit, and concentrate on the point that the other half is playing away. At your expense.

Yes, I do believe it's possible to just have sex, and not get emotionally involved. 'Fuck-buddies' are what you call people in that kind of relationship.

Former Member

Originally posted by Kermit
People who cheat on their partners are the lowest of the low.

have the decency to end it, or keep your pants on. It's quite simple.

took the words right out of my mouth...

Former Member

Agreed with what has been said, if your the kind of person that wants to shag around don't bother with the relationship and if your in a relationship and want to end it before hurting anyone.

Former Member

I meant if you're all alone (i.e. not in a relationship) and you have have someone that's interested but in a loveless marriage.

Former Member

thing is, sex is a very emotional thing, I can't possible understand how anyone could not become emotianally involved with someone while having a sexual relationship with them.


plus, sleeping with someone who you know is married is pretty wrong imo.

Former Member

Yep, sleeping with someone you know is married or in a relationship is baad aswell.

And about emotions, I know some people are capable of separating sex from emotions (mostly men, but some women too) but I could never do it, i have to be very careful about sex because I have too many emotions, and see sex as a very emotional thing.

Former Member

Originally posted by JustWondering
I meant if you're all alone (i.e. not in a relationship) and you have have someone that's interested but in a loveless marriage.

thats not your place to wreck it once and for all though. If its really loveless, she should end it, not sleep around.

Former Member

Plus you only have their word for it that it IS loveless. Sorry but a lot of people who have affairs say things like this because they need to justify themselves.

And even if YOU didn't become emotionally involved, what's to say the other person wouldn't? Especially if it's a woman, women usually have affairs for emotional reasons rather than just for sex.

Sounds like a situation better avoided if you ask me.

Former Member

Originally posted by Miffy
Sounds like a situation better avoided if you ask me.

:yes:

Former Member

Originally posted by ~*STRESSED*~
Like Kaff said, whats the point in being in a relationship if you are just going to sleep around? You may as well be single

I think the point is that you're having your cake and eating it - ie having regular sex in a relationship, and getting extra outside of it too.

Former Member

I heard once, on Sex and the City (perhaps not the most reliable source of information in the world, but this interested me nonetheless), than when a woman (and I assume this applies to men as well) has sex with someone, a chemical is released in her brain that causes her to become attached to that person, and thus encourages her to ask The Questions:

Does he like me?
Will he call me?
Will this happen again?

Blah, blah, etc. I, for one, know what it's like to think you're "just having sex", but it turns out you're actually becoming somewhat infatuated, and what starts off as "fuck-buddies" turns into something a lot more complicated, and I'd have to advise against it. I went through a very confused and difficult time when I started falling for the person I was sleeping with, and wouldn't wish for anyone to go through that. It's not nice, especially when the feelings aren't mutual.

As for having sex with someone who is already involved (or having sex with someone else when you are involved) - I can't say I've ever done that, and I don't imagine it's a great idea, either. It's obvious that someone in the circle is gonna get hurt, and it's not a fair thing to do now, is it.

Former Member

a married guy i know was just a mate and back then his wife was his soul mate, he'd cheated on her but said it was rock solid and he'd never leave her. Then he took a shine to me and told me how his narriage was on the rocks and loveless! haha what bull. It's the oldest line in the book.
For me personally, I cant have sex without getting emotianally invloved, however it's different for most men, woman find it harder to not to have feelings. What's the point of loveless sex anyway? It's crap. I've cheated in the past as a teenager but they werent proper boyfriends and I was young and foolish. Sine I've grown up I've never dome it and I never will.

Former Member

Originally posted by princessamy
I know some people are capable of separating sex from emotions (mostly men, but some women too)

Originally posted by VinylVicky
however it's different for most men, woman find it harder to not to have feelings.

That's not fair - how do you know, and what makes women so different? This isn't another battle of who's-more-morally-bankrupt here, you know.

Former Member

Originally posted by AverageJoe87
That's not fair - how do you know, and what makes women so different? This isn't another battle of who's-more-morally-bankrupt here, you know.

It's nothing to do with morals, so get off your high-horse. It's very basic survival.

Males do not invest much in children, sperm, that's it, no major commands on their time, which is why sex is easy. For females they've invested several months, at least, which is why sex is harder, and partners more important. It's survival, women don't want to waste time being out of the reproduction pool. It's instinct, the way we're put together.

Former Member

Originally posted by AverageJoe87
That's not fair - how do you know, and what makes women so different? This isn't another battle of who's-more-morally-bankrupt here, you know.

*yawn* It's true. I said most not all. It's not a put down so dont get offended. Most men can have physical relationships without emotion, most women cant but there will always be exceptions.

Former Member

Originally posted by Fiend_85
It's nothing to do with morals, so get off your high-horse. It's very basic survival.

Males do not invest much in children, sperm, that's it, no major commands on their time, which is why sex is easy. For females they've invested several months, at least, which is why sex is harder, and partners more important. It's survival, women don't want to waste time being out of the reproduction pool. It's instinct, the way we're put together.

round of applause, exactly what I wanted to say but I didnt have chance to put it together.

Former Member

Originally posted by Fiend_85
It's nothing to do with morals, so get off your high-horse. It's very basic survival.

Males do not invest much in children, sperm, that's it, no major commands on their time, which is why sex is easy. For females they've invested several months, at least, which is why sex is harder, and partners more important. It's survival, women don't want to waste time being out of the reproduction pool. It's instinct, the way we're put together.

Hey, don't get me wrong, there's no horse in sight. I was just questioning her choice of the lexis 'most' - just didn't fit to me. That's all. I refuse to represent the male species... Don't do a good enoguh job anyway.Peace.

Former Member

Originally posted by Mr_Wobble
I think the point is that you're having your cake and eating it

I've soooo never understood that saying .. if you have a cake what else would you do with it but eat it?

Former Member

Originally posted by DiamondGeezer
I've soooo never understood that saying .. if you have a cake what else would you do with it but eat it?

Keep it, so that you have a cake of course.

Former Member

Originally posted by Miffy
Keep it, so that you have a cake of course.

Yes, but then its going to go stale, old and moldy. So either you eat it, or you watch as it spoils.

Former Member

It is possible, but it is very difficult to not let your emotions get involved, once that starts happening i'd get out, as it's not nice to be at that situation.

Former Member

Originally posted by Fiend_85
It's nothing to do with morals, so get off your high-horse. It's very basic survival.

Males do not invest much in children, sperm, that's it, no major commands on their time, which is why sex is easy. For females they've invested several months, at least, which is why sex is harder, and partners more important. It's survival, women don't want to waste time being out of the reproduction pool. It's instinct, the way we're put together.

Guys get an instinctive 'protection' feeling for someone they're with, because they need to protect the mother of their child to carry on their genes.

Former Member

Originally posted by TheShyBoyInTheCorner
Guys get an instinctive 'protection' feeling for someone they're with, because they need to protect the mother of their child to carry on their genes.

What's your point?

Former Member

Originally posted by bongbudda
Yes, but then its going to go stale, old and moldy. So either you eat it, or you watch as it spoils.

You could freeze it.

Former Member

Originally posted by Miffy
You could freeze it.

But if you have no plans to eat it whats the point?

Former Member

Originally posted by bongbudda
But if you have no plans to eat it whats the point?

Because you're torn between your desire to keep it and your desire to eat it. Keep it, no eat it! No, wait, keep it. Freeze it and torment yourself by toying with the possibility of defrosting and devouring it.

Former Member

Originally posted by Miffy
Because you're torn between your desire to keep it and your desire to eat it. Keep it, no eat it! No, wait, keep it. Freeze it and torment yourself by toying with the possibility of defrosting and devouring it.

So you can enforce torment on yourself. Why would you do that?

Former Member

Originally posted by bongbudda
So you can enforce torment on yourself. Why would you do that?

Some people are masochists.