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f%ck buddies
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Ok, I was just wondering what peoples experiences with f%ck buddies were. It looks like i am heading that way with a guy i know (who has a girlfriend), and i realise this could end very messily, so what are peoples views on it?
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thats the question at hand... think of yourself.
BUT, you have to know that both of you can do it, its all very well knowing that you're not going to fall for him/her but do you know they wont?
There are loads of single men, why do girls always try and steal someone else's man?
Very much like married men, if a womans felt they're good enough to marry then thats a sign of aproval.
There may be loads of single men, but are there loads of single men that I want?
Anyway, I am seriously not out to steal this girl's guy, I just like this guy physically, and just want a bit of fun for the mo, i just hope it won't messy.
How would you like someone to do that to you one day? because what goes around, comes around.
Fuck buddies are fine if youre both single, but if hes got a girlfriend, then its wrong wrong wrong.
Have some boundaries!
She's just as bad if she knows he has a girl.
It takes two to tango, and he is in the wrong to be even contemplating it, but that doesn't mean that she's in the right.
Shagging a taken man is not "a bit of fun", and if the lass finds out it will be very messy. Because nobody likes the mistress.
You only want him 'cause he's taken. It's really quite pathetic.
But have to say, although it takes two to tango, you should be the respectful one- if he's such an asshole as to cheat on his girlfriend, I know i wouldn't want anything to do with the low life scum because as rainbow brite said, he's an asshole!
If you fancy him, accept youre attracted to him, but that doesnt mean sleep with him. Hes unavailable. If he wants to finish with his girlfriend, then let him do that before you sleep with him.
FAO: Rainbow Brite - you know very little about the situation to assume i am a fucking bitch, i just hope somebody is as compassionate as you are when you find yourself in a difficult situation.
FAO: Kermit - i do not just want him because he is taken, where the hell did you get that idea from? He just happens to have a girl, which is a bit annoying but if he doesn't care about his girl's feelings, why should I?
And nobody likes the mistress, as we live in a sexist world, it is always the view that evil, tempting women are out to get girl's men.
I know this, that's why i am trying to not get attached, because even if he left his girl for me, i could NEVER trust him. It is all very detached. And i know what i am doing is unfair to this other girl, but, emotions can make people do crazy things, sometimes which are v.selfish.
It's not a difficult situation at all.
If you know someone is taken, then you don't go with them.
It's amazingly simple.
Call me old-fashioned, but it's common human decency.
Why should I stop my car when a kid is on a zebra crossing? I don't know the kid, what difference does it make to me?
If he doesn't give a shit then that's his problem, and her problem, and it's a real shame that "memememememe!!!" is the only attitude people have now.
I don't know her, why should I respect her, is basically what you're asking. And it stinks.
Sexist *yawn*
If the mistress doesn't know then I have sympathy, but if the mistress knows then she is an accomplice, and has guilt.
For the record, it works the other way around too. If you were taken and he wasn't, I'd be calling him a selfish twat too.
If youd said `im falling in love with this guy but hes taken, what am I to do"
then id feel sorry for your situation.
Dont try and change it round now and say actually your feelings for this man run very deep.
I actually think if he doesnt care about hurting his girlfriend he should finish with her, and maybe you SHOULD care about her, because you sure as hell would want the other woman to take you into account if someone was trying to fuck YOUR boyfriend.
I have pity for your feelings of wanting your own pleasure even if it means hurting others to get it. I hope you overcome them and do the right thing.
If you sleep with this guy when he is also sleeping with someone else, then yes, that is a fucking bitch thing to do.
If you sleep with him AFTER he has finished with his girlfriend, then that is absolutely fine and dandy. Nothing to feel guilty about,
If you sleep with him while he`s still with his GF but with her blessing, then that is fine too, but unlikely.
If you dont sleep with him at all, then that is also fine.
What I dont like here is the deceit.
You are so fucking self-righteous, I know my actions aren't perfect, but life isn't perfect, surely you must realise that all situations aren't so black and white. Ok if s/o is taken you don't go with them, but what if they are in an abusive relationship, or a loveless one, or a controlling one, and want to get out? This is off the point as this isn't the situation i am in, but life isn't so clear-cut, ok?
Emotions aren't always sensible or decent, that's life.
Please take it from someone who knows (but isn't going to go into it as it's private) it is really really not worth the hassle. Whatever he says, whatever he does will be lies. Lies to cover his tracks and let him have the best of both worlds. It must be great for him. A girlfriend at home and a girl waiting for no strings sex. And even if she finds out he will be let off more than you because that's the way it works.
At the end of the day it's your choice, you have to make your own mistakes. But just be warned you might think it's all so easy and be able to distance yourself from the guilt, but it will catch up in the end. I hope for your sake you don't fall for the bloke because all you'll get is heartache at the end of it.
You should have enough respect for another person to not sleep with him.
It really is fantastically simple.
If they don't like the relationship, it is up to them to not be a fucking coward and end it.
Either this bloke wants his cake and to eat it, or he is hoping he'd get caught so she'd dump him, because he's a coward.
Either way, he's a selfish twat, and as you know he's taken, you're as bad.
And unless you define self-righteousness as someone saying "no, you can't have that, you selfish person, you should have more respect for people" tyhen, no, I'm not self-righteous.
I have some emotions for him, i like him, but it isn't love or anything, i just think he is nice, it isn't deep or anything.
I know i am being deceitful, but the older i grow the more i see that almost everyone cheats that i know, that doesn't justify my actions, but it just seems that everyone else does it, why shouldn't I? Are you both saying (rainbow and kermy), that you have both never cheated on anyone?
And I know i am being selfish, i am messing with another girl's man, and it could all blow up in my face badly, but i just have found someone i fancy and like, and want a bit of fun.
I haven't slept with him yet, just messed about, so i might stop it b4 it gets too far.....
I've never cheated on anyone. Because I care for someone more than that.
Everyone else doesn't do it. Most people have more respect for themselves and other people than to do it.
Do unto others as you would have done unto yourself.
It is very selfish. If you're happy being a selfish relationship-destroyer then yeah, it's your life, honey, but you asked for our opinions.
It's your life, your choice, pet. Just don't expect us to respect you for the choice you make if you go and sleep with him.
Ok, fair enough, maybe i will think about my choices more, it's just v.hard to be selfless when you are in the moment...
It is hard to be selfless when it feels good.
It's still only fair, because you would be gutted if your blokey did that to you. And you would blame the mistress. You know you would.
Yes, I would prob blame the mistress and hate her, but it's wrong as my man is going out with me, he should be the one caring about me and not doing stuff to hurt me, the other woman really doesn't have any obligation to me, except common decency. But we live in a culture where women always blame each other, because it is expected of "men" anyway, which isn't right.
Not everyone does it.
I think its something that some people do, but they really shouldnt.
He broke my heart even when I didn't know he had a bit on the side, and then when I finally thought I got over him, it took one hell of a brave mate to tell me that he had been carrying on with one of my friends, and my heart was broken all over again. That all cost me my GCSEs and 8 months of what are supposed to be the best times of my life, which I have to live with for the rest of my life, I went through such a shit time and even tried to kill myself twice.
That's just my experience of it all, and I really wouldn't want to put anyone through that, no matter how much you say you don't care about her feelings.