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Stupid comment of the week
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in General Chat
I love chavs. They do come out with the most pointless drivel I have ever seen. Somehow they believe it actually makes sense. I heard this one whilst putting the finishing touches on my UCAS form at my old school.
Teacher - 'why did you hit him?'
Chav - 'because he looked at me.'
Yep, it's another intellectually astounding piece of logic. Almost as bad as another amazingly fantastic amount of abuse I received once at the Romford Brewery. I'm paraphrasing here, but this is it.
Chavgirl - (in true essex girl style) 'oi oi saveloy!'
Me - kept walking along thinking 'twat' and looking for an ATM
I can't remember precisely what chavgirl's boyfriend said, suffice it to say it had something to do with me 'checkin out my bird', I assume that would be his girlfriend in English. I think he challenged me to a fight too, although I wasn't really paying attention and I didn't understand most of what he said anyway.
The point is, I was looking up and down the walls for an ATM, I may have flicked my vision past his 'bird' for a fraction of a second, didn't pull focus and didn't particularly want to anyway. What exactly was the point?!?
Teacher - 'why did you hit him?'
Chav - 'because he looked at me.'
Yep, it's another intellectually astounding piece of logic. Almost as bad as another amazingly fantastic amount of abuse I received once at the Romford Brewery. I'm paraphrasing here, but this is it.
Chavgirl - (in true essex girl style) 'oi oi saveloy!'
Me - kept walking along thinking 'twat' and looking for an ATM
I can't remember precisely what chavgirl's boyfriend said, suffice it to say it had something to do with me 'checkin out my bird', I assume that would be his girlfriend in English. I think he challenged me to a fight too, although I wasn't really paying attention and I didn't understand most of what he said anyway.
The point is, I was looking up and down the walls for an ATM, I may have flicked my vision past his 'bird' for a fraction of a second, didn't pull focus and didn't particularly want to anyway. What exactly was the point?!?
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Comments
"we can win this"
ahh the joys of twisting anything goes into politics
ned 1: 'thats a big long word'
ned 2: 'trows-errr-snake'
both: gigglish childlike laughs
:rolleyes:
the brewery, charming area, full of chavs and people racing mopeds
I used to feel safe due to the massive black security guards. However, a couple of months ago someone got stabbed outside. Plus when you come out of the multistorey there's always some drunk outside Time and Envy who yells abuse or throws something.
is it a case that they are thick, or justin does have such a large trouser snake, or he's just such a big dick
justin. tit. nuff said.
"Who does it wrong, gets the points; who doesn't get it wrong, gets zero"
:crazyeyes
:yes:
The best one I have is from my replacement GCSE maths teacher, the one that was meant to teach us the Higher stuff:
"It's only numbers"
Pupil - Sir, can I show you something?
Teacher - I haven't had an offer like that in years!
(That was while an OFSTED inspector was watching!)
Pupil - Sir, can I go to the toilet?
Teacher - Only if I can watch!
Teacher - (referring to his pocket watch) it's getting stiffer and stiffer...
Yet another silly thing to say, this time from A-Level Chemistry
Pupil - 'Is the gas constant ALWAYS 8.31???'
sub teacher: 'now children, if you have 8 bananas, and a bluebird eats 9 of your bananas, how many bananas will you have left'
boy: 'erm minus one?'
sub: 'BANANAS! GET OUT!'
i couldnt believe it
Pupil - *searches for pen in pencil case*
Teacher - I'm sick of you playing with your little toys! *takes pencil case off pupil and places on desk* take out a pen and get on with your work!
Pupil 2 - how can he without his pencil case sir?
Teacher - *growls*
'get out yer jottersh and yer rulersh'
my favourite, mr proctor, who became dr proctor, then doctor protracter *hehe*
they spent hours mimicking him saying 'a-two and a two turds...'
Bitter? Me?
I don't normally disagree with you Kermit, but that is absolute total and utter bollocks.
There are a great many teachers who are very knowledgeable, very efficient as teachers, have a genuine interest in the future of children, enjoy helping a child develop, and work exceedingly hard to achieve the goal of giving every young person a future.
To make a sweeping generalisation branding them all as being morons shows a lack of profound understanding into how hard some actually work. There are some teachers who are lazy little bastards, yes. Not all.
I didn't say they were lazy, I said they were stupid.
See the difference?
They're not stupid though. Most of the lazy ones are the ones who can't teach. They are stupid. They are moronic.
There are a great number who know their subject very well and who are exceptionally good teachers.
Maybe I was just fortunate enough to meet 2 of them. Out of a teaching staff of, ooh, 40.
I don't like teachers. I respect how difficult their job must be, but I don't like teachers. They do nothing to protect pupils, as a general rule.
Normally because they're too busy being sued and abused left, right and centre by parents who don't actually know what's best for their children.
i met maybe one or two teachers who seemed truly passionate about the subject, the rest couldnt be arsed or were too fuckwitted to care.
one teacher in primary school sent me home because i said pigs have hair (which they do) obviously felt outsmarted by an 8 year old.
no most of my teachers were little hitlers who were snappy and spiteful-if they hated the job then why continue doing it?
Nornmally it's sex abuse charges, atch.
Teachers, as a collective, never did anything for me. And I don't think I can ever forget that.
to be honest my dad taught me the most, maths, history and science. a lot of the things the teachers skimmed over so i was well prepared. they hated it that i thought i knew everything, i didnt, they just hated that id bothered and they hadnt
I agree. Out of all my teachers in my school, less than half of them were efficient at teaching. Most of them didn't make the lessons enjoyable, and if the lessons aren't enjoyable, then people aren't going to keep their attention focused for long...
"Look, that's not how the UN is. Actually it is, but different."
"In the football matches that are transmitted live, the announcer(word?) has seen the video and knows what will happen."
And one other time, a dog had entered the classroom and that teacher was looking at it and saying "Please get out".
but my a level law teacher had a website devoted to him a while back with all his quotes etc, about 80 in total
Maybe I was blessed with being in a school that through it's reputation hired a body of at least 40 truly inspirational and knowledgable teachers.
No, I didn't go to a public school.
We started a tally and the record was 75 in one single lesson.
"Go oooooon, fuck oooooff". Was rather funny.
Funny quote of the week had to be out last night in a club in Oxford, where someone had just offered me a try of their cocktail, which I tried, and then was almost sick due to the bananas in it (Im anti-banana). Someone later said...
"Why dont you like bananas then? Is it because they remind you of willies?"
I laughed for the rest of the night about that one!