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Mums job to worry
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Would you say it's part of a mums job to worry about what their children get up when they go out even though all the children are over the age of 18 & classed as adults?
Or would you say that mums just interfere with your private life & it's got nothing to do with them where you go & what you get up to?
For example say i'd been invited to go out to the pub with my sis then i'd have to tell my mum where i'm going even though I don't want to.
I'd rather just go out to the pub because it's got nothing to do with my mum where I go & who I choose to see as it's my private business & none of hers.
But then i'll know that if I don't tell her where i'm going then i'll just get the 3rd degree when I come back home & that deters me from even going in the 1st place because maybe it's too hard for my mum to grasp that her youngest baby boy actually has a life of his own & can safely go out & come back instead of having to stay at home in the security of my bedroom all the time.
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Or would you say that mums just interfere with your private life & it's got nothing to do with them where you go & what you get up to?
For example say i'd been invited to go out to the pub with my sis then i'd have to tell my mum where i'm going even though I don't want to.
I'd rather just go out to the pub because it's got nothing to do with my mum where I go & who I choose to see as it's my private business & none of hers.
But then i'll know that if I don't tell her where i'm going then i'll just get the 3rd degree when I come back home & that deters me from even going in the 1st place because maybe it's too hard for my mum to grasp that her youngest baby boy actually has a life of his own & can safely go out & come back instead of having to stay at home in the security of my bedroom all the time.
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Comments
Yes, it comes with the territory. I don't know if she is actually giving you the Spanish Inquisition or just asking fairly civilly. When my son goes out I ask him where he's going, just so I know...oh, I dunno... say, should I want to get hold of him, or should one of his mates be looking for him whilst he's out. If I'm going out I tell people where I'm going. It's just basic communication, common courtesy when you share a life and a home with other people. I'm sure it's not because she desparately wants to know all the ins and outs of your life. But yes, she will probably still worry about you when you are 58, never mind 18. Sorry. It's in the job description.
As i still live at home i have to tell my parents where i'm going and who i'm going with but it doesn't bother me too much...it's not like i'm up to no good! Last night i wasn't home at half 3 so my mum sent me a text to see where i was...it's there duty to do these things. I think it's kinda sweet to have somebody constantly thinking of you
I have no idea what I'll do when I'm a Dad ... But you can bet my kids are getting PAYG mobiles phones when they start school, I don't care if they lose them or whatever!!
I can still remember how arwful it felt to come back to school at the end of the school trip and have everyone else's parent pick them up whilst mine were god knows where
Standing outside a locked school gate all on your own was scarey at that age .. seems a bit weird now though cos now I know the school is actually only a 20 minutes walk from home, but back then seemed a lifetime away!!
I strongly suspect no one in the world has any idea how strongly most parents feel for their child until they themselves become parents!!!
Yeah I do that. I'm never asked where i'm going & when i'll be back I just say. But it's more like asking permission but then I know that my mums not going to tell me i'm not allowed to go.
So, then it's seems abit pointless saying where i'm going as my mum won't ever have a problem with where i'm going.
I say to her that if she gets worried then give me a call on my mobile cause where my mobile is i'll be. But she's got this whole complex that mobile phones are a devils technology & she won't call me to find out where I am.
Take the following week for example I went out with my sis whilst my mum was at work. Then when my mum came home she just thought I was in my bedroom asleep. Then she only realised i'd gone out 2 hours before I come back (i'd already been out for 5 hours) so she worried for 2 hours as to where I was & then she gave me a call on my mobile as I was just coming in the front door. When she could have easily done 2 hours earlier to find out where I was:mad:
Well she does ask who i'm going to be with.
Also, if I go & visit my sis for the weekend then when I come home she'll ask what i've had to eat like she thinks my sis is going to starve me of something:rolleyes:
Well then it isn't asking permission, is it?!
Well at least she knows HOW to use a mobile, unlike Mr Miffy's mum. I seem to remember Diamondgeezer had some amusing tales regarding parents and mobile phones too....
She's probably just trying to gauge if you require further feeding.
Honestly, it's a bloody thankless task sometimes being the parent of a teenager! She's just doing what mums do, would you rather she didn't give a toss? One day you'll look back and appreciate it.
Just a thought...maybe these feelings of irritation are a sign that you're about ready to fly the nest?