If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
Can U be mates wit a EX?
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
OK, well as sum of u might know if u read the post i put on here a few weeks ago asking u 2 cheer me up coz i'd just dumped my bf. Well 4 those of u that don't know i dumped him a couple of days b4 xmas coz basically it weren't working out.
The day i dumped him he went 2 his Dad's 4 a week who lives in Southampton. Whilst he woz there i spoke 2 him on the fone a few times & when he got back 2 Reading & so i thought we were mates.
A few days in2 Jan he sent me a letter saying that he need a bit of time & space 2 get it in2 his head that we weren't 2gether ne more & that he didn't want 2 c or talk 2 me.
I woz a bit pissed off & upset by that but could c why he didn't want 2 hear from me. But it has been nearly 2 weeks now wit no contact & i don't want him back but i really wanna be mates wit him.
I woz wondering if u think i should fone or txt him & ask how he is etc & if he wants 2 be mates?!?
I don't wanna push it so i woz just wondering if 2 weeks is too little time?
The day i dumped him he went 2 his Dad's 4 a week who lives in Southampton. Whilst he woz there i spoke 2 him on the fone a few times & when he got back 2 Reading & so i thought we were mates.
A few days in2 Jan he sent me a letter saying that he need a bit of time & space 2 get it in2 his head that we weren't 2gether ne more & that he didn't want 2 c or talk 2 me.
I woz a bit pissed off & upset by that but could c why he didn't want 2 hear from me. But it has been nearly 2 weeks now wit no contact & i don't want him back but i really wanna be mates wit him.
I woz wondering if u think i should fone or txt him & ask how he is etc & if he wants 2 be mates?!?
I don't wanna push it so i woz just wondering if 2 weeks is too little time?
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
0
Comments
j9
it can take a while 2 get over sum1.
I agree wiv j9. Give it a few weeks.
U can be friends wiv an ex, but in my experience, it takes a looooooong time to get things bak 2 a normal relationship just as friends.
I tried it with my ex too soon, and we ended up messing around again, and in the end going out again.
You've got to make sure ur both COMPLETELY over each other b4 u try to be friends.
Otherwise it will end up messy.
The more sand that escapes through the hourglass of time, the clearer we should be able to see through it.
so i didnt ring him. and then after i came back from the pub on the 27th (or it may have been 28th, i dunno!) i found out from him that he was going out with his best female friend. so we had a beeeeeeg argument, i said i never wanted to hear from him again, blah blah. also went through a couple of days of wanting him back severely. but i got over that, and now its over a month later. and on saturday i emailed him to catch up a bit. and so we're getting to be email friends again i think, i know i dont want him back, but i think it would be too hard to hear about his new relationship. so i dont think we could ever be proper friends.
mind you this was over a long term relationship, which he seemed to almost disregard at the end and hurt me by saying he got with this girl who i didnt like and who i suspected, on our anniversary. and he was just generally nasty to me for the 2 weeks before. but maybe we will be friends in the future. looks like we might be at the same uni... <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif">
sorry for talking about me so much, everyone is fed up of my probs! i agree with j9, wait a couple of weeks and then either email him or write him a letter. i dunno about NO emotion, thats a little hard. just tell him you want to be friends, youre sorry it didnt work out and if you did anything to hurt him, apologise for that too. dont expect too much too soon though.
If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else.
but sayin all this,im now in contact again with an ex of 2yrs ago! only through letters at the mo but then it is possible.
its sad really................ <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif">
i'm not denying that women are stupid; God made us to match the men.
However this isn't to say that its easy, or that it'll happen right away.
I'd wait 'til he calls you up. Or at least a while longer.
Soz bout that ppl just needed 2 get it out of my system!
bet you're glad you ended it with him now! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">
If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else.
i do it all the time, i wouldnt worry! i havent been ostracised yet, just moaned at a lot about my long posts! hehe <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">
If you don't know where you're going, you'll probably end up somewhere else.
now 10 months on we have made up, and are really good mates, the best thing is she is engaged + i am soooooo happy for her.
ok i feel a bit jealous, but if she's happy then so am I.