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She Infuriates Me.
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm at the end of my tether with my sister.
She's 21, has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which makes her a horror of a human being.
She left home when she was 15 and then at the age of 17 moved 200 miles away. She's recently moved back home with me, mum and dad, and things have gone back to how they used to be. She dominates everything and everyone, and I can't stand her.
I actually, hate her so much. She bullied me no end when we were kids, and she hasn't changed at all.
Everything was lovely when she wasn't there - I had my mum and dad all to myself and the house was calm. We went on foreign holidays and had a great family life.
Now that she's back, it's gone to pot. My Dad has never got one with my sister (he's her stepdad) and they've always had a tempestuous relationship.
Mum and dad have just made a decision to part company and dad's moving to the next town. I can't help but blame my sister for this. It was perfect when she wasn't here and now she's back - my mum and dad have split up.
I often bottle up my feelings about my sister, because she's to emotionally unstable to actually handle my feelings about her. But I find myself, every month or so, blowing my stack and saying things to her that I shouldn't. I really hate her, and can't contain it all the time.
I feel so angry that she's living at home, and want her gone from my life, I can't take it anymore.
I don't know what to do.
Ilora x
She's 21, has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, which makes her a horror of a human being.
She left home when she was 15 and then at the age of 17 moved 200 miles away. She's recently moved back home with me, mum and dad, and things have gone back to how they used to be. She dominates everything and everyone, and I can't stand her.
I actually, hate her so much. She bullied me no end when we were kids, and she hasn't changed at all.
Everything was lovely when she wasn't there - I had my mum and dad all to myself and the house was calm. We went on foreign holidays and had a great family life.
Now that she's back, it's gone to pot. My Dad has never got one with my sister (he's her stepdad) and they've always had a tempestuous relationship.
Mum and dad have just made a decision to part company and dad's moving to the next town. I can't help but blame my sister for this. It was perfect when she wasn't here and now she's back - my mum and dad have split up.
I often bottle up my feelings about my sister, because she's to emotionally unstable to actually handle my feelings about her. But I find myself, every month or so, blowing my stack and saying things to her that I shouldn't. I really hate her, and can't contain it all the time.
I feel so angry that she's living at home, and want her gone from my life, I can't take it anymore.
I don't know what to do.
Ilora x
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Comments
I am curious as to how this could help?
The way you wrote it came over to me that Ilora-Danon should see a doc which is why i was confused. All cleared up
I don't think she needs to see a psychiatrist, perhaps a counsellor or something, about her angry feelings, but not a shrink!
She's passed doctors.
I just fucking resent the fact that she's move back home.
Ilora x
If your dad is definitely leaving and moving to this nearby town, would it be possible for you to move with him? Or at least go there from time to time when it gets too much at home? As much as I feel (and you probably do too) that you shouldn't have to move out of your home over this, I think it might be the best thing - taking your happiness and wellbeing into account.
Out of curiosity, when you go mad at her, how does she react?
Sorry, wish I could give you better advice
She doesn't seem to have developed the intelligence needed to know when to shut up. She's enfuriates everyone with her childish attitude.
Her mental age has been estimated to be around 15 yrs old, just so you know what I mean.
Ilora x
Anyway, it doesn't sound to me as though there's a lot you can do. Move out, or put up with it...and that seems totally unfair but I can't see any other options. Other than if she agreed to go to a cognitive behaviour therapist (about her OCD) and either some other form or therapy, or medication for her ADHD.
Is it a possibility to move in with your dad?
What does your Mum say about the way she makes you feel? Or does your mum feel the same way you do?
Questions, questions eh...
I don't want to go living with my dad, because I'm off to Uni in sept, and want my bedroom left where it's been for the past 15 years. I don't see why I should leave, when she was the one to come back after 4 years.
My mum hates herself, because she doesn't like her either. She feels guilty because she dislikes her own daughter.
I'm gonna have to put up with it I guess, I just needed somewhere to vent...
Something else that I can't deal with is the way she sees me. She doesn't see me as an equal, and because I'm here 'little sister' she think's she can treat me with disrespect. She lied to me the other day (she's also a pathological liar) and I asked her to explain why she lied to me. Her reply was 'it's only you' which shows her complete lack of disrespect for me and I can't hack it.
I fuckin hate her!!!
Ilora x
So to make life easier you could help yourself deal with her by getting youremotions out in the open to a professional counsellor. I recommend emailling
Get Connected or phoning them (they're a general help service for young folk) for free: 0808 808 4994 1pm-11pm every day.
You could also try Saneline which offers practical information, crisis care and emotional support to anybody affected by mental health problems- so they could probably give you some tips on how to cope with your sister.
Best wishes x
I was wondering that?
We had no choice but to let her move back home...
Ilora x