What should I do???

Former Member

I've been going out with this guy for a month or so now, but the problem is I like him as a friend rather than a boyfriend.

I've brought up the subject a couple of times, but he says that it's stress (which it isn't) and we can just leave things until after the exams. But I don't want to, I can't handle the commitment, not with him or anybody.

And I'm not sure how to tell him without hurting him. My friends say I should gradually become more distant, but I'd rather just tell him and get it over with because he's a nice guy and it's his first relationship, I don't want him to think he's done anything wrong.

What should I do??? Any help greatly appreciated <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

p.s. starting this thread has made me become an Insane Poster! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt; wow

[This message has been edited by wildchild (edited 24-05-2001).]

Former Member

u gotta be straight with him!! although it will hurt him it would hurt him more in the long run if things keep going the way they are going. he is clinging on to u cos u are his first girlfriend and that is understandable but it is best that you end it now!
congrats on becomin an insane poster <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

Former Member

i think that you should tell him straight because if you keep him hanging the futher into the realtionship you get the harder it will be for the both of you!

i think you should say that if we are ment to be together then fate will lead us back ino the right paths!

Former Member

I agree with everyone else just tell him if u gradually pull away he gets more attached to u as a girlfriend and thinks he's doing something wrong cause your pulling away from him telling him maybe be alittle harder on u but worth it if u want him as a friend just try your best to make him understand it's not his fault

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I know I'm not perfect but I can smile

Former Member

hello wild,

nothing to do but agree with everyone else. if he's ur friend, he deserves the straight answer. it may hurt him, but he'll feel better knowing you were honest with him from the start.

good luck.

and congratulations on the new stars <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

[This message has been edited by Calvin (edited 25-05-2001).]

Former Member

That is tricky, but as everyone's said, best end it now while you still like him as a friend, rather than wait and break it off slowly, which nobody deserves. I think if your roles were reversed you'd prefer to be told straight out.

good luck <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

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This is the first day of the rest of your life.

Former Member

Thank you all for your advice, it was much appreciated <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; I've told him and I'm not sure how well he took it but it's done anyway, and I feel better for having told him (I guess I do anyway....if you push the guilty feelings out of the way for long enough....)