question.

Former Member

can you love someone too much?

discuss.

Former Member

how so?

i guess in the sense of unrequited love then yes.

I think also in the sense of investing (horrible word) yourself so much into one person can be harmful if the bottom falls out and they are no longer there (your whole life collapses). I have two freinds who are madly totally in love with each other, which is great and they are lovely people....BUT there has always been that question that if they ever split up; what would happen? scarey that no-one ventures to even guess.

But falling in love with someone isn't something you can control or avoid; much less how far you fall.

When love blinds reason that can be dangerous.

Former Member

but how much is too much? where do you draw the line between being crazy about someone, and just being crazy?

just something i'm pondering today.

Former Member

i guess when you're putting too much emphasis on one person to the point that it has negative effects on your relationship with them.

I think the one great casualty of romantic fixations tends to be other freindships.

Former Member

when you obsess about that person. when your whole life is for them, and nothing else matters. perhaps?

Former Member

wen your other friendships suffer from not seeing them, then your too dependant on the other person

Former Member

You could probably send yourself a bit crazy if you can only think, eat, sleep this one person! Especially if they don't love you as much.

Former Member

I always say, if you find yourself wanting something/someone soo badly you can't bare the thought of yourself being without it, can never be good for you -

Former Member

When you get dependant on the one person, everything revolves around them and you start to think that they can hold your world up...then they become the reason it falls apart when they decide that although they said they'd always be there, they left

Malt x

Former Member

In some respects, yes I think you can love someone too much. For example if it's only one way and you start stalking them and want to kill their other half etc.

Former Member

When you threaten kill yourself when you break up. Or waiting outside your house everyday even when you have made it quite clear you are not/no longer interested.

Former Member

I think I was too in love with my ex.

Former Member

Yes, like when they dont love you the same amount back.

Former Member

You can sort of love someone too much. When it becomes a bit obsessive, and you can't bear to be appart from the other person. It's too much when envy and suspicion, panic and worry, start to take over. It's too much when unreasonable demands are made by the one whose doing the OTT loving.

Former Member

In my experiance, yes. Women don't want love as much as I thought. At least the women I'm around. Love is an experiance only the lucky few can enjoy. And by few I mean about the 4 or 5 billion of us on the planet. The rest of us are just shanked.

Former Member

yes,

when you become dependant, or obsesive, relient or over protective.....

when it will hurt you more than than them, if it were to go all pear.....

when it affects your chances of making rational discisons all the time....

when the love is not reciricated - thats when it hurts the most

Former Member

there is also an uncomfortable element to some thinking when it comes to loving someone; Who wants to be alone? (in a more grave sense; who isn't afraid of dying alone?)

Especially if you have had experience of lonliness, or have had alot of separation in your family