Playing away

Former Member

my boyfriends gone on holiday with his best mate and i cant help but think that hes gonna cheat on me, hes says he wouldnt but wen we split up in the past he slept with someone on that night and then started seeing me again behind his new girlfriends back

now im back with him its put doubt in my mind, i know he wouldnt cheat on me while he was at home but in a different country im not so sure

what do you think?

Former Member

we were together 9 months.

he slept with another girl aswell behind his exs back.

i do trust him totally when hes here but for some reason theres doubt in my mind while hes away especially as hes with his best mate whose not the faithful type.

Former Member

i dont think he cheated on tigerlilly, he cheated on the girl he rebounded from tigerilly on

xx

Former Member

Find sum1 betta

Former Member

Originally posted by katie_henderson
Find sum1 betta

no she eeds to tlk to him, cause its clear she dont trust him so he needs to reassure her

Former Member

If that was me, i wouldnt be able to trust him atall :no:

Former Member

Originally posted by wheresmyplacebo
no she eeds to tlk to him, cause its clear she dont trust him so he needs to reassure her

He sounds lke a rite selfish ****

Former Member

Hunny, you got to talk to him before he goes. Explain you want to trust him, but with what happened before it wouldn't kill him to reassure you and see what he says and how he says it - From that you're the only that can judge whether you can truely trust him or not - If you think you can trust him, then you have to let it go when he does go away - Don't let it eat you up inside, coz by the time he gets back you'll be a state and no guy is worth that. Though if you still have doubts, then maybe thats it trying to tell you that there might be no future for the both of yous.

Former Member

well to be fair on you, it doesn't seem like he's given you much reason to trust him.

but, people can change...and to be together, you have to learn to trust him.

Former Member

Originally posted by katie_henderson
Find sum1 betta

Which part of don't use txt spk do you find difficult to comprehend?

Former Member

IF there are doubts in your mind, you need to air them with him, but without sounding obsessive or paranoid.

Essentially you will simply have to trust him- if you don't trust him you will have to leave him, so any possibility in his actions are removed.

Former Member

From what you've already said, you just can't trust him. No matter what he says, or you say to him, the trust has already been broken, you know exactly what he's like, and likely to do, and you know you can't trust him. All you can do is hope he will listen/understand, and may not cheat, again.

Former Member

i reckon, if he's gonna cheat..he'll cheat. there's not a lot you can say or do to stop him doing so.

Former Member

Originally posted by ~*STRESSED*~
Have you spoke to him about your concerns??

i have the feeling she hasnt and he's noticed somethings up, and fink shes off with him which leads down a really dodgy road

just talk to the guy! *from a guy fed up of stupid hints, just come out with it*

Former Member

i spoke to him before he went and he promised me that he wouldnt cheat. he rang yesterday (he went on sat) and told me that his best mate whose also got a girlfriend isnt being faithful and that his mate has been with a couple of girls already:rolleyes:, my only doubt is if his mates off with these other girls, whats my man doin in the meantime? i very much doubt hes asleep.:chin:

i dont know what to think, what would u think if it was you?

Former Member

It seems to me that your concerns are added to by the fact that he has been unfaithful before (in a different relationship) and what he did the night you split up.

In a normal situation (without those added complications) I would say that you have to be very careful about continually trying to talk to him and get reassurance. Nobody likes to be pestered all the time by their partner - and sometimes it can end a relationship.

In this situation, knowing what you do, you really do need to get him to be clear about his feelings toward you, and you have to guard yourself against being shat on from a great height. Trust is a difficult thing. Even the most trusting can be hurt in love. You have to have faith in him, but its a hard place to reach.

In all honesty if there is nothing else suspicious about your relationship (While he's around and not on Holiday) then you should feel confident that he is what he says he is. But if there are other things going on that add to your suspicions then beware.

A small amount of posessiveness is healthy but sometimes it can go too far.

Former Member

Not being rude but at the moment there's really sweet fuc* all you can do about it while he's away. You've played your card e.g. the getting his promise not to cheat bit. Basically it's up to him now. He knows how you feel about his cheating and the more you bring the subject up the more it will be in his mind and the more wound up he'll get. Nobody likes to be reminded about how you don't trusts them.

If i were you just see how it goes when he comes back off his hols. At the end of the day you'll just have to trust his word. If you find out he has cheated then get rid as he'll have completely disrespected you as he obviously realises that you find the cheating aspect upsetting.

Former Member

I know how you feel!

My bloke's away on his holiday with his mates on the 7th of June for two weeks! :nervous:

He and I got together through cheating on his girlfriend with ME! Argh. However, his mates all have girlfriends, the football's on.

That's all that's keeping me sane at the moment. I know how many times he's ignored me when I've wanted a kiss or summat when Celtic's on or whatever.

I'm thinking he'll be more inclined to do so with a scantily clad tart. He LOVES his football. Any football, fuck his PC game of Champion's League makes him squeal like a woman.

Plus, he's more happy with me than he was with his ex. But I'm still going to have it out with him. I'm just a bit paranoid is all, he's really goodlooking, however shite at chatting up. I'm just fussing. Argh.

Former Member

That sounds scarily like my bloke really. Lol. He's football obsessed and is away at the moment on a golf holiday with the lads. The first two days i was thinking hmm whats he up to. Then i just thought oh sod it, he's got three broken ribs, he's staying right next to a place which has footie on all the time and he'll probably be in too much pain and too drunk to bother.

Former Member

well, to be fair, i think hell cheat on you tigerlilly! but at the end of the day its only gona be a holiday thing, hes there for a week with his slag of a best mate!

what would you do in his shoes?

its not like hes even doing it to hurt you, same as you wouldnt want to hurt him if you cheated.

at the end of the day, if the cats away the mouse will play, so go on, get ur ball of string out and have a nice game of 'catch the ball of string' i hear its a lot of fun.

Former Member

Personally, I wouldn't let my boyfriend go on holiday without me.

Former Member

your in a very trusting relationship then?

Former Member

Just be careful, If youre not sure of him then make sure you use condoms when he gets back, get him tested.