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Telling them

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
ok I have talked to some people about this but I'm going to make a post about it anyway

Telling someone u possibally love them how do u do it?
I mean i have been told that if u love someone u should tell them even if u r taking a big chance of yourself getting hurt but does anyone think it's sometimes it's a good idea to to just shut up about it and wait till u get over it (do u get over something like this?)
I guess what I'm asking is can somebody just get over love and continue being friends with that person?


I know I'm not perfect but I can smile

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Telling someone u possibally love them how do u do it?
    I mean i have been told that if u love someone u should tell them even if u r taking a big chance of yourself getting hurt but does anyone think it's sometimes it's a good idea to to just shut up about it and wait till u get over it (do u get over something like this?)
    I guess what I'm asking is can somebody just get over love and continue being friends with that person?

    If you fall in love with one of your friends I do believe you should tell them, I told a friend of mine that I'd fallen for her and that and she just said that and I quote:

    "We're too close now to take things further, we're best friends, I don't want to risk our friendship for a few weeks of sex"

    We're still really close, I do still love her and would do anything, but I'm quite happy with just being really close friends. I'm glad I told her, I mean it would of been hard carrying on without her knowing wondering for months/years etc. of what could of been....

    I think you should tell your friend, at least get thinks out in the open, if they say no then you've lost nothing and it shouldn't be an issue with going back to your friendship and you never know they could end up saying how they felt the same way but where too shy to say anything and it could be the start of a beutiful friendship.

    Good Luck.. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Justin Credible:
    I think you should tell your friend, at least get thinks out in the open, if they say no then you've lost nothing

    Exactly, although it's easier said than done of course.

    I was considering the same thing 17 months ago, I decided to tell him because I was sick of wondering if there was a chance and I wanted to know for sure how he felt. To cut a long story short it didn't have a happy bf/gf ending, but we have become closer friends. But I'm really glad I did tell him because I can act differently around him now, I can't explain it too well I'm afraid!

    I don't know an ideal way to tell someone you love them, but I'd definitely advise against coming out with "I love you" (which is what I did) <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt;

    Have a read of my infamous e-mail that I posted somewhere on the boards a couple of days ago, I think it's really relevant to this topic. This is how it ends:
    Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.............NO ONE WAITS FOREVER
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    but r things the same now as before u told her? his friendship is the most important thing to me right now but i do love him
    I know I'm not perfect but I can smile
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've found the link now: http://www.thesite.org/ubb/Forum4/HTML/000552.html

    And I also forgot to say that I'm still in love with the guy now (19 months on). The feeling will fade in time, but in some cases it takes longer than in others.

    Good luck with whatever you decide to do <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    kitty you so know how i feel about this lol and my situation and everything.

    aint postin it here tho, so those who dont know, aint gonna!! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    (anyone think ive been talking to lee too much? lol i think i might be turning into her ever so slightly.. *wants to laugh about something but that person who said it doesnt read thesite *sigh**)
    Never put off to tomorrow what you can avoid altogether.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Kitty_Meowing:
    but r things the same now as before u told her? his friendship is the most important thing to me right now but i do love him


    kitty -- if his friendship is the most important thing and you are extremely afraid of losing it or it changing for the worst, then don't do it now.

    i also know how hard carrying a torch for a friend is too. eventually, you will come to a point where ur gonna hafta tell him or you'll explode.

    just know that when you do, nothing will ever be the same again, no matter what happens. and there's nothing u can do to change that.

    just do it when ur ready, and know that either he's gonna feel the same, or you're going to have to deal with ur friendship on a different level if he doesn't.

    good luck kitty.
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