depression.

Former Member

Every so often I have periods where I feel very depressed. At the minute im more depressed than I have ever been.

Its down to a number of things which I cant do anything about, or can but find it too hard. In particular-:

-the poor relationship and constant argueing i have with my mom who is the only family member i have cept nan and grandad

-my failing relationships which prevent me from doing anything else as i cant concentrate

-the amount of work i have to do that i cant handle and the exams i need to pass but just cant because of everything else


its awkward though. ive seen these forums before and all the people who have problems with depression are just told 'well done for admitting you have a problem' and get thrown telephone numbers at. I dont want someone falsely trying to give me the idea that i have made this major accomplishment by posting anonymously on a forum. And i dont want any phone numbers to call. It might sound like I dont want to help myself, but i dont want to call any numbers and i dont want to visit a doctor but what is there I can do? I dont want to put any of my friends in the situation where they feel obliged to help me and i have no family i can talk to.

Something else that might sound stupid, as it seems stupid when i think it. But so many times i have read on THIS forum and many others that people self-harm to cope. well im not fucking coping as it is. Im not saying i want to try selfharming, that would be retarded, but sometimes I just wander..

Everything thats happening is leaving me with an unhealthy obsession with the internet. im only happy when im on chatrooms and msn to people. Just wanted to make it clear that thats the result of how im feeling not in any way the cause. Im sure i could stop the internet at any time but id just be sitting silently doing nothing every day.

People always tell me to occupy myself, but its so hard when i cant concentrate on anything for a minute. even when i planned on writing this ive forgot half of the things i wanted to say.

Any replies appreciated

Former Member

Depression is an illness like any other, and needs to be treated like any other illness does. Going to a doctor doesn't make you a failure or a time-waster, it shows that you want it to stop enough to actually do something about it.

And I hate to say this, but nobody can help you but yourself. If you aren't going to do the running, nobody else can wave a magic wand at you and make it all better. You can either stay as you are, or you can try and get help. The choice really is as stark as that.

Former Member

It sounds like people have already given you ideas of ways to help yourself - keep yourself occupied, etc., but you don't feel they're helping. Why don't you want to talk to someone? As Kermit says, depression needs treating, and that means going to the doctor or trying to find some counselling.

That said, theSite has a guide to depression, including ways to help yourself. Follow the links from the front page.

Please don't start self-harming, that won't solve anything.

Kimono

Re: and another depression thread.

Really sorry to hear that so many things are getting you down at the moment. Periods can be a pain in the neck at the best of times, but if you definitely feel worse when you have them then a visit to your GP would be worthwhile since they can give you medication that can sort out any hormonal problems that might be making you depressed.

Originally posted by AhRass


its awkward though. ive seen these forums before and all the people who have problems with depression are just told 'well done for admitting you have a problem' and get thrown telephone numbers at. I dont want someone falsely trying to give me the idea that i have made this major accomplishment by posting anonymously on a forum. And i dont want any phone numbers to call. It might sound like I dont want to help myself, but i dont want to call any numbers and i dont want to visit a doctor but what is there I can do? I dont want to put any of my friends in the situation where they feel obliged to help me and i have no family i can talk to.

It must be frustrating when all you get given are links and phone numbers, but mods and posters do tend to be genuinely concerned when they try to help! The mods aren't trained counsellors, but by giving you info like that they're pointing you in the direction of professionals who can give you a top service in helping you cope.

So in case you bear this in mind, here's the site's helpline page. At least the majority of helplines are free, so really what have you got to lose?


People always tell me to occupy myself, but its so hard when i cant concentrate on anything for a minute. even when i planned on writing this ive forgot half of the things i wanted to say.

From what you've said, it does sound like you've got depression. This info page about
understanding depression lists symptoms you might identify with and advice on breaking free.

Depression is such a complex mental illness that people who have it all deal with it differently, and while self-harming is far from the ideal solution, it's not retarded either.

Try to tackle every little bit that's making you feel depressed at a time, such as talking to a GP to sort out depression caused by your hormones, or telling your teachers how you feel (which might make them be more lenient or give you extra tutoring).

Hope this helps!
Take care
x x

Former Member

Thanks for that.

No one can help me now its just gone too far. sorry

thanks again,

Former Member

It's horrible that you feel things have gone too far, but I assure you they haven't. It's never to late to have treatment for depression, and all I can do is urge you once again to see your doctor and try to get some sort of treatment for this.

Take care.

Former Member

it's never too late.

i started getting treatment 7 years after i started getting depressed.

now, 7 years after that, i'm doing ok.

it's a hole you have to pull yourself out of. and it's not easy, but it is worth it.

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass
No one can help me now its just gone too far. sorry

YOU can help yourself.
As has already been said depression is an illness and can be treated. Yeah it can be a long road to recovery but with medical help/counsellors etc you can get better.
You have realised you have a problem, so do you not think it would be best to get that help ?
You say about throwing helpline telephone numbers out, I personally would find it much easier to tell a total a stranger my problems rather than someone i know. Talking to a stranger you will not get judged like you could by talking to a mate, which is why many people suggest phoning helplines. If you dont speak to someone then the problem just escalates.

I hope you try to get some help, you really dont have to suffer

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass
Thanks for that.

No one can help me now its just gone too far. sorry

thanks again,

Depends if you want them to.

No-one can wave a magic wand to get you out of it. You either have to want to get out of it, and be prepared to do the work, or you want to stay in the pit. No-one can help unless you let them.

It's never too late, but you have to want to do it.

Former Member

as Kermit said, you've got to do it yourself. You've got to want to change your life, no-one can do it for you. There's no pancea that someone can give you. I know it's hard, but it's worth it.

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass

No one can help me now its just gone too far. sorry

Why did you post this then?
It's that bit of you...the bit that thinks there should be more to life than....'this' that you need to listen to. Grab it, kicking and screaming and don't let it go.
You can get help, you deserve to get help and you can BE helped.

But it starts your end. Wallowing is easy. Giving in is easy. If you're sick and tired of being sick and tired then you can do something about it.

If you want to.

Former Member

Originally posted by Smash
Why did you post this then?
It's that bit of you...the bit that thinks there should be more to life than....'this' that you need to listen to. Grab it, kicking and screaming and don't let it go.
You can get help, you deserve to get help and you can BE helped.

But it starts your end. Wallowing is easy. Giving in is easy. If you're sick and tired of being sick and tired then you can do something about it.

If you want to.

seconded.

Former Member

Originally posted by Smash
Why did you post this then?

Attention.

If you are wanting the attention that a post like this brings, then that would probably mean that you don't want to die after all. If you die then there won't be any more you; you will just be a memory. I don't think you want that.

Former Member

Originally posted by Kermit
Attention.

If you are wanting the attention that a post like this brings, then that would probably mean that you don't want to die after all. If you die then there won't be any more you; you will just be a memory. I don't think you want that.

Inconsiderate.

I dont expect you to understand completely, I do expect you to start telling me how you do understand and what a hard life youve had.

the reason I posted it was because i was upset, and depressed. i had noone to talk to and I thought that i could safely unload any pressure with anonymity. Im not so sad as to seek attention over the internet. I dont do it in real life, why should I do it on here? If my post bothers you that much dont reply. If you feel like its your duty to set me straight and share your negative impressions of me with all of your other internet friends, dont reply. Thats all I ask.

Thanks for the replies. Im thinking about going to see my gp.

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass
Im thinking about going to see my gp.

Good on you !!

I suffered post natal depression and at the beginning I didnt see that I had a problem, however after time I realised I did have a problem.
I wasnt eating, was in a world of my own, used to sit and do nothing, cried a lot and eventually I realised that I was ill and needed treatment. It didnt get better overnight, but hey I got there with the help of anti depressants and just talking.

Go get some help

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass
Thanks for the replies. Im thinking about going to see my gp.

That's a really important step! Well done.

Former Member

Originally posted by AhRass
Inconsiderate.

No, honest as I saw it.

If my post bothers you that much dont reply. If you feel like its your duty to set me straight and share your negative impressions of me with all of your other internet friends, dont reply. Thats all I ask.

No negative impresions on my part.

My general experience is that if someone talks about how they want to "end it all" then generally that means that they don't really, at least not at that time. It's not attention-seeking, which I presume is what you thought I meant, but it's the way it does seem to go; it's a way of getting people to notice, and try to do something. People who really are suicidal don't tell anyone that they are, they just go and do it.

Thanks for the replies. Im thinking about going to see my gp.

That's a good start:)

Former Member

A little help please

Hi i was reading this, and thought you guys might be able to help me. I have a friend that suffers from depression. In the beggining i didnt know about it, he just kept dissappearin from school for ages and no one could figure out why. But we got quite close and he talks to me bout how he feels. Thing is our exams are in like 3 weeks and i dont think hes planning to take them. I know if he misses out on doin them now he will never get round to them and he will regret it, but nothing i say or do can seem to shake him out of it. Ne suggestions?

Former Member

Hiya
First off, it's probably best if you start a new thread if you want replies to a specific question - it just means that you'll get mor eresponse and you won't take over other people's threads!
No worries though. Depression is a big problem and there's no sure-fire way that your friend will be able to subvddenly snap out of his and be back to normal. What you can do is support hikm as much as possible and learn about his depression together. Has he been to the doctors about this or spoken to anybody else?
He could try calling the following helplines:

Careline
Telephone counselling service for children, young people and adults on any issue, including relationships, depression, mental health, child abuse, bullying, rape and sexual assault, domestic violence, addictions, stress etc.
Telephone: 020 8875 0500
www.careline.org.uk

Depression Alliance
Charity offering information and self-help groups.
Telephone: 0845 123 23 20; www.depall.org
The helpline is charged at a local rate and will automatically put you through to your nearest office.

Is it possible that the exam stress is at the root of his problems? If so these resources may help:

how to cope with exam stress - Mind booklet
Exam result stress

Hope this helps