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Newbie.... help?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey peeps.. a mate of mine introduced me to this board and thought it was pretty cool... hope people will show me the ropes soon <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

Well the start off i was just wondering what people's opnions are on this:
Im 'bi' well about 80/20 (dunno why but thats how i feel) and really fancy this boy from my year... but he hardly know i exist (how cliched was that) but its driving me mad... a friend reckons that i should come out to the whole year on the last day of term and that 'there will surely be people who are in the same boat as you'... what do you peeps think? I personally think it might be a very effective way of gettin beaten up <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; (i do go to an all boys school in the city of london and its quite... er.. conservative)

any replies would be really nice and if people think its not worth bothering with then its fine also <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; seeya!

...*off to get drunk (again)*...


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well I wouldnt admit it as I agree that you may get a beating at the very least, or is that just where I go to school?

    welcome anyway. Sorry I aint too much help but enjoy your stay here


    Just done a banging shit. Won't flush. You might have to push it down
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont think its worth the trouble of telling your whole year, theres no need for them to know anyway. I think if u wanna be honest then tell the people close to u and if other people ask u about it then tell them otherwise leave it <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
    Welcome to thesite by the way!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya, welcome to The Site, we've had quite a lot of newbies recently so you needn't feel lonely, and everyone here is really friendly so if you want to know anything just ask. I'm sure you'll fit in fine <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    We had a bisexuality topic a while ago in the sex forum, check it out for some opinions: http://www.thesite.org/ubb/Forum1/HTML/000659.html

    Your friend's suggestion is quite interesting, and I agree with what lolly and c_b have said about there being no need for you to tell everyone. On the other hand there's also no need to hide it, not being straight is nothing to be ashamed of and a lot of people have no problem with it.

    I think if I was bi I'd probably tell people about it, there would be some who acted strangely towards me but at the end of the day if they couldn't accept me for who I was then I wouldn't let their opinions matter to me. I'd probably get bitchiness rather than violence though since I'm a girl.

    Anyway that's just my opinion, take it or leave it <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt;
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    id agree with telling the people closest to you. i think its prob a bad idea announcing it to everyone, you might well get the whole beating up thing going on after it.

    do you mean 80% straight and 20% gay? im probably about that or a bit less on the gay side. i wouldnt tell EVERYONE, id get so much bitchiness. ive kind of told my 2 best friends in school and some of my friends on here too. one of the m8s i told is bisexual himself, the other one isnt, so she was a bit hmmmm okay.

    but i think telling your whole school like that could be a bad idea.

    Burn baby burn!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    welcome to thesite, dude. this is a very interesting way for you to introduce yourself.. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    you've done a smart thing by soliciting advice from this group, they'll give you some of the best info and opinions possible.

    what i would say here is it doesn't sound like you really want to let anyone know about ur sexuality yes, and u know what? that's totally ur right.

    but this decision is much more serious than just getting beat up by your classmates.

    if you come out, you will face a lot of difficult times because there are a lot of close minded people out there. of course, what you get is the right to be who you are, and that is worth fighting for.

    if you choose to do this, just make sure you are absolutely sure u r ready to live with yourself and the rest of the world as a gay person, because fairly or unfairly, and before anyone knows anything else about you, that IS what the world will see you as first.

    good luck dude.

    [This message has been edited by Calvin (edited 26-04-2001).]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd just like to say here from experience that coming out and saying your 'Bi' to your school is something you should really think carefully about, I came out when I was 16 to about 4 people and within about 2 weeks everyone knew, it had just spread like rabbit-fire and even everyone from my old school knew about it... this then followed me through college and when I joined the army people spoke with people who knew me and it escolated out of control...

    I do feel happier for people knowing, yes, but I think that you should only speak with people whom you trust closely as one thing that does always seem to happen with this 'bi' stigma is that people instantly think it means 'gay' and unfortuantly it makes everyone see you in a different light (ie. bi somehow means you like to hump anything with a pulse)

    As for this lad, I'd speak with some of your friends, unfortuatly lots of straight people in this day of age take 'bi/gay' people fancying them as a great insult and sometimes violence emerges from your innocent 'fancying'...

    I'm not trying to scare you and I'd like to point out that your going to have some really great times and experiences in your future, all I'm trying to say is that you be careful...

    Keep Smiling... <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    Just adding on as well, there unfortuantly aren't many resources which deal for the Bi market and one of the only sites I know is: http://www.bi.org

    [This message has been edited by Justin Credible (edited 26-04-2001).]
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey thanks for the responces chaps... actually im not really that worried about coming out as much as being scared of what that boy will say... as for the 20/80 thing... im 80%gay i know its weird buts its just an approximation on how i feel towards the sexes in general <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; believe ive got a lot of flak for it such as 'bat for teams' or 'buttered on both sides' etc etc <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt; but i think its a good laugh... and the telling people thing... too late <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; i came out to my mate in year 9 and within a week my whole year knew but i didnt get much shite though which was nice... this new school not many people know it and i think it would be damaging since its all boys...
    so what do u peeps think of bi people then? cuz it seems people are too used to treat u in one way or another.. either one of the 'lad's or one of the 'girls!!!' which meams u are pretty screwed when it comes to relationships cuz people keep thinking ull go for the other lot! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt; just a thought...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ok my feelins 2wards bi or gay people is the same as my feelins 2wards straight people.

    Im a straight female but i have a load of gay/lesbian/bi m8s both male & female & wen im seen hangin wiv them i get classed as the same & it really doesnt botha me bcoz if people r that shallow 2 assume summat like that then thats there choice.
    If i was an anti-bi/gay/lesbian i wud have lost many of my closest friends so if people r stupid enuf 2 treat others different bcoz they r not the same then they're the 1s losin out artent they?
    Neway thats how i feel
    xxx <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    If u have a good soul u can make sum1 happy!! If u can make sum1 happy ure a good person & a good friend!
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