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why do i do this to myself/ fallen for my best mate
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Dunno even why i'm writing this, get some of the crap that's in my head out maybe? so apologies for the drivel that follows i'm sure it'll provide some sort of amusement for the very bored on here
All the way through my lst relationship, my ex kept on saying their was something going on between me and my best mate J. I told her repeatedly and even got J to tell her that her and me were just friends and that's all she saw me as.
well in the end, relationship didn't work, and we broke up. Due to unfortunate timing i broke up with my gf the same weekend that J broke up with her bf when she was coming up to visit me to go clubbing, neither of us knowing this at the time. So i get all sorts of accusations form my ex unsurprisngly. Especially since that weekend J asked if i wanted to be her flatmate when i finished this year and she ahd saved up enough to move out of home, she had finished uni the last year, i'm a retard and repeating my last year.
so all is well and good, i may not have a gf but am moving out with my bestest mate in the world as soon as i finish uni and we're also off to glastonbury together. Then of course after a few more weekend trips together between 2 dif cities to see which we like best to decide where to move to, i come to the conclusion that i actually do fancy the arse off of her and like her far more than a friend should do.
So, i'm now about 2-3 months form finishing uni, and fallen hard for my future flatmate and best friend. i can see this being a recipe for disaster. i can't exactly say, erm, actually i don't wanna move out with you anymore, cos she's gonna understandably wanna know why. but if i do then, arghh.
why are men such as myself idiots and fall for inappropiate people?
All the way through my lst relationship, my ex kept on saying their was something going on between me and my best mate J. I told her repeatedly and even got J to tell her that her and me were just friends and that's all she saw me as.
well in the end, relationship didn't work, and we broke up. Due to unfortunate timing i broke up with my gf the same weekend that J broke up with her bf when she was coming up to visit me to go clubbing, neither of us knowing this at the time. So i get all sorts of accusations form my ex unsurprisngly. Especially since that weekend J asked if i wanted to be her flatmate when i finished this year and she ahd saved up enough to move out of home, she had finished uni the last year, i'm a retard and repeating my last year.
so all is well and good, i may not have a gf but am moving out with my bestest mate in the world as soon as i finish uni and we're also off to glastonbury together. Then of course after a few more weekend trips together between 2 dif cities to see which we like best to decide where to move to, i come to the conclusion that i actually do fancy the arse off of her and like her far more than a friend should do.
So, i'm now about 2-3 months form finishing uni, and fallen hard for my future flatmate and best friend. i can see this being a recipe for disaster. i can't exactly say, erm, actually i don't wanna move out with you anymore, cos she's gonna understandably wanna know why. but if i do then, arghh.
why are men such as myself idiots and fall for inappropiate people?
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Comments
you aren't an idiot, as you cant help how you feel. the most important thing is that you know that nothing was going on between you and this girl while you and your ex were together. whether she chooses to believe that is upto her (she probably wont, in my opinion), but that's life!! i suggest you finish your last few months of studies before talking to this girl. just be honest and explain that you wanted to let her know how you felt as you are going to be living with her. sorry i aint much help, but that's all i can suggest. dont worry too much about your ex, as she may get a new b/f soon herself
(bet all that didnt help at all did it??)
it'd be fine if i knew nothing was ever gonna happen, but certain things make me think that their mgiht. whether this is wishful thinking on my part or an actual possibility i'm not sure
Maybe you need to go for a more subtle attempt, when your out together flirt loads, have a few drinks and see what happens.
Sx