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families
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ok, so i see so many posts on here about people hating their mum/dad/cat/dog/fish that i thought i'd ask...
how many of you actually have a good relationship with your family?
i really love my family. i seriously don't think i'd be here today if it wasn't for them. especially my mum.
i mean, it ain't all sunshine and roses. my dad has problems showing affection, and i can remember him hugging me once in my life, and that was only cause my mum made him. but he goes out of his way to do things for me, and i've come to realise that that's his way of expressing that he cares.
i have a very difficult relationship with my brother, for reasons best not explained, but i get on well with his girlfriend, and i'm godmother to his son.
and the rest of them are great. and not just my immediate family. because they're polish they have very strong family values. my cousin is like a cross between a sister and a best friend, and my aunt is like a second mother.
so yeah. no moaning about your families in my thread. wax lyrical about them instead.
how many of you actually have a good relationship with your family?
i really love my family. i seriously don't think i'd be here today if it wasn't for them. especially my mum.
i mean, it ain't all sunshine and roses. my dad has problems showing affection, and i can remember him hugging me once in my life, and that was only cause my mum made him. but he goes out of his way to do things for me, and i've come to realise that that's his way of expressing that he cares.
i have a very difficult relationship with my brother, for reasons best not explained, but i get on well with his girlfriend, and i'm godmother to his son.
and the rest of them are great. and not just my immediate family. because they're polish they have very strong family values. my cousin is like a cross between a sister and a best friend, and my aunt is like a second mother.
so yeah. no moaning about your families in my thread. wax lyrical about them instead.
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Comments
You don't choose your family so why be close to them??!
I only get on best with my sis now but my mum & sis haven't seen each other for like 4 years now due to some silly reason.
I've got 3 other bros. 2 are in their 30s so me @ 18 we don't really have anything in common. Then my other bro still leaves @ home & me & him just totally hate each other because we are in each others faces constantly.
As for my dad well I hope he dies soon as it will do us a hell of a lot of favours.
But everything from the outside would look all rosey but on the inside it's a living nightmare. 'Living the lie' that's my family in 3 words.
.:Crispy:.
My family are great. My mum & dad are the best parents you could have. We get on great and they'd do anything for me and my brother. We never argue and they've always been supportive of whatever me & my brother want to do. They're fab. Me & my brother get on well too, we annoy each other like most siblings, but we're not horrible to each other and even though he's 4 years younger than me he does look out for me a lot when he's home which is quite funny and we've got a lot closer since he's been in the army.
my mum is so cute and i'm always hugging her. i don't know what i would do without her.
my dad can be a miserable bastard but he is so funny and sweet too. i always try and look after him and we are really affectionate too. i stroke his bald patch and twist his big ears hehe.
my parents have told me all through growing up and still to this day how beautiful i am and how proud of me they are. they do that to my brother and sister too.
i don't see my brother and sister that much because they live in NY and i rarely speak on the phone to them. but when they come home we click straight back into place. they are so much fun
i'm not sayin my family is perfect, none is. living at home during the holidays can take its toll on the relationship. seeing each other everyday when i'm used to having my own space. yeh we argue but we kiss and make up literally 5minutes later.
I just don't think it's necessary to have a good relationship with your family.
NO person DOES choose their family, so your only nice to them because of luck and default!!!
You really are an arse, monocrat
I rarely want to tell mum anything, but she's always been there and whilst she hasn't understood, especially with the self-harming, she hasn't pretended to. She gets on well with t'missus too, so that's great :yes: My dad is like me, he doesn't quite always know how to show affection, but I know he does- a couple of times he's taken time off work to go to the pub with me when I've been home from uni. The only arse is that cos he doesn't show anything it's really hard to say thanks :yeees:
The exetnded family are great too, everyone really is quite close-knit- it scares t'missus to death
Why?? Family means jack!!
:impissed: Yeah, they only gave you life to throw it back in their face. Let's see how you feel when you have a wee kid of your own and they say the EXACT same thing.
I bet you wouldn't have the balls to say that to your Mum or Dad - "Family doesn't mean anything, I'm only pretending to love you all."
You'd be disowned in a second mate. That is the worst way to show any gratitude for them.
If you like family so much, try living in an Eastern one. Many reckon you should still love your parents even if they beat and abuse you!
I'm my dad's little girl. We have a great relationship and he always goes out of his way for me... He finds it hard to communicate, but we don't go without a hug and a kiss every day.
My sister, now that's another issue. She has ADHD, OCD and PTSD. You can imagine how difficult she is to get on with. She's recently moved back home after 4 years of living away... but nothing's changed, she's still the 15 year old she always was. It's hard, and we have our fights and fallings out, but I do know that she's my sister, and it wouldn't feel right having anyone else as my sister.
I have 2 older brothers who have their own lives and their own kids. They're 31 and 27. I haven't seen them in about 5 years, and to be honest, I couldn't care if I never saw them again.
Ilora x
I think family is SUPPOSED to be your guidance through life, or at least the beginning of it!
they actually chose to raise you, and thus be your friends for lifetime (unless you screwed up with them badly
so this way it hasn't got anything to do with randomness!
of course many parents fail to give guidance & friendship to their kids, which is a real shame, but the parents fault! not the kids'!
in this case it's totally okay not to have a close relationship to the family. I mean you can't force things that don't work out, even if it's sad!
but I wouldn't deny parents' love from the beginning on! maybe YOU just think that they wanna harm you (like not allowing you out till 1am and stuff when you're just 14)
so before writing your family off I'd go ahead and give it all an objective look and try to fix it! if that's not possibly (happens too unfortunately) then leave it! but parents can be the greatest friends on earth (for free and for lifetime!)
As I said, no one can choose their family. It's a lottery as to whom your parents would be!
it's the lottery of your life if you wanna put it that way.
My dad is dead but I really appreciate my mum now. We are all quite independent, some times I don't see or speak to my mum for weeks!!
We dont hug or tell each other things...i mean i literally tell them nothing. I just think if they want me to "open up" etc they should have brought me up that way. Its unfair to expect things to suddenly change after 20 years.
-Im always arguing with my mum, she picks up on everything.
-My dad and i didnt use to get on at all, but now its just okay i guess.
-My brother and i get on when noone else is there. My family have always favoured him over me, and it doesnt just piss me off, it makes me sad too. But whatever, fuckit.
on the other hand...i really like my cousins and my aunt! My aunt rocks...she is such a blast and more "in tune with the kids". And my eldest cousin is the same age as me and we get on really well! If only they didnt live in Australia...
My parents have made too many mistakes in bringing us up in order for me to try and feel anything other than the obligatory love. I'm not really close to my other family either.
Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out, other days I'm glad I'm not close.
It doesn't.
Your family may 'look after' you, but just because you are related o somebody doesn't mean you are obligated to care for them!!