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Wow I've actually got a girl problem now...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
OK over the past three months I've got to know this girl really REALLY well. We have nothing in common superficially, we like about two bands between us, don't do any of the same subjects at school and she has no interest in current affairs.
But beyond the superficiality we are still incredibly comfortable around each other and can talk for hours on end without having to really search for a topic! I've told her so much stuff I'd never tell anyone else and she's done likewise. Despite the such short time, she's become one of my best friends.
The thing is... she's also very VERY attractive and has a long term boyfriend who's at uni in Dundee. For a while now I've entertained the idea of going further with her but never actually dared to because I was scared she wouldn't feel the same way and it'd fuck things up between us.
Well on Monday she came round to my house and we ended up lying together on my bed. It wasn't in an overtly sexual way, just really really close. But then I looked into her eyes with our foreheards together and had to kiss her. She responded to it and I spent the greatest evening of my life with the most beautiful girl in the world.
But know that a day or two has passed she says she is really confused about what to do because she loves her boyfriend but doesn't want to lose me as a friend and doesn't want to hurt me. I regret putting her through this all because I initiated it and I understand that she'll go back to her boyfriend but I can't seem to put it out of my mind! Before Monday I thought if I did maybe ever kiss her it would help me put her out my mind and I could move on and get a proper girlfriend. Thing is, now I'm thinking of her even more so that plan backfired!
So does anyone have any advice on how to get over her whilst still keeping her as a friend and avoiding the awkwardness of it all?
And yes I know it was a bastard thing to do to a couple, but from what I hear, he cheats on her all the time in Dundee and it wasn't something I was taking into consideration at the time.
But beyond the superficiality we are still incredibly comfortable around each other and can talk for hours on end without having to really search for a topic! I've told her so much stuff I'd never tell anyone else and she's done likewise. Despite the such short time, she's become one of my best friends.
The thing is... she's also very VERY attractive and has a long term boyfriend who's at uni in Dundee. For a while now I've entertained the idea of going further with her but never actually dared to because I was scared she wouldn't feel the same way and it'd fuck things up between us.
Well on Monday she came round to my house and we ended up lying together on my bed. It wasn't in an overtly sexual way, just really really close. But then I looked into her eyes with our foreheards together and had to kiss her. She responded to it and I spent the greatest evening of my life with the most beautiful girl in the world.
But know that a day or two has passed she says she is really confused about what to do because she loves her boyfriend but doesn't want to lose me as a friend and doesn't want to hurt me. I regret putting her through this all because I initiated it and I understand that she'll go back to her boyfriend but I can't seem to put it out of my mind! Before Monday I thought if I did maybe ever kiss her it would help me put her out my mind and I could move on and get a proper girlfriend. Thing is, now I'm thinking of her even more so that plan backfired!
So does anyone have any advice on how to get over her whilst still keeping her as a friend and avoiding the awkwardness of it all?
And yes I know it was a bastard thing to do to a couple, but from what I hear, he cheats on her all the time in Dundee and it wasn't something I was taking into consideration at the time.
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Comments
OTHER SOLUTION: Risk it and try to get her make a go of the relationship, though you would risk losing her. I'd advise against this.
Then again I'm not in the position to give relationship advice with my recent record.
Talked to her a lot earlier today and a lot of the awkwardness between us that I was first afraid of has gone. I don't think she'll ever leave her boyfriend and even if she did, another long distance realtionship with someoen like me (I'm going away to uni in september) will be the last thing she wants.
Hopefully now we'll be able to go back to being as good friends as we were before and build on it.
Yeah that sounds sensible - just think you have a great memory, and can continue the great friendship at the same time. Good luck