Rejected or not??

Former Member

Hey,
theres a thread I made a while back about having trouble asking a mate out. (see the thread started by me on page 5 if you're interested, would help if you've seen that but this is all understandable just from what I've wrote here).
Well about 30 minutes ago when we were both online I asked her out.

Went out with her during the day to the cinema and round the shops. Was lots of flirting, kept holding hands, putting arms round each other, etc. Kissed each other on the cheek a few times and later on, kissed properly once not long before parting ways.
So thought tonight would be the best time to ask after all that...

Her response was: She likes me too, thinks I'm funny and sweet, and not like other guys. Says she'd love to go out sometime, but that shes not quite ready yet.
Then said shes not saying she wont change her mind in a few months or even weeks.

On her profile online, the bottom of it has "looking for a guy...." (and so on). Yet she said shes not ready to me before.

So do you think shes telling the truth, and that she might actually go out with me in a few months or weeks? Or that this is just a white lie to let me down easily?

Been turned down twice now and never been sucessful so pretty pissed off now, and depressed, sorry. Any rejection tips wouldnt go amiss either! Thanks for reading this.

Edit: Would it help to ask her straight if she was lying? I might ring her tomorrow, and tempted to ask that whilst on the phone if I can find out the truth.... or would that be a very bad move?

Former Member

dude thats the worest thing you can do is to ask a girl out in a note or online man. You have to ask them out by taking her somewhere where you won't be bothered and your alone. Maybe not alone by yourselves but alone to where none of her friends are around(or yours). Advice for next time, just ask them out. Don't be afraid. Really when you ask a girl out for the first time, ya its understandable to be a little nervous. But once your past that, then you have a lot more confidence. Trust me man. Don't be afraid. Just tell yourself that nothings going to happen and don't think about it too much. If you think about it your going to think of worst case senerios and thats not wat you want.

As for her rejecting you, I am not sure because I am sorta going through the same thing except we already went out. Next time you see her, talk to her about it. If you don't see her anytime soon, call her up and just talk. Try to stay away from the idea of going out and just talk to her. Then bring it up.

Former Member

You say it shouldnt be done online or in note... is the phone okay though? I dont think I'll see her for a while but I am ringing her tonight.
This was sort of my first time. The other time I was pissed and the mate asked me if I liked her, didnt actually ask that one out. And yeah I was nervous cuz of that.

She thinks my main worry was that we'd fall out if she said no cuz thats what I told her before asking - which was true because the time I told that other girl I liked her, she didnt wanna be mates anymore.
She said dont worry and that shes not going anywhere and that wont happen again. But if I ring her and mention that.... could that scare her off cuz if I'm not gonna get anywhere with her, I wanna be mates with her.

Can someone still tell me what they think of that above question? ... do you think shes telling the truth and would like to go out in a few months or even weeks? Or that it was her way of letting me down easily?

Former Member

Hey,
dont want this sounding rude or anything, but can someone plz reply before tonight? I'm ringing her tonight and havent got a clue what to do about it.
Would it be a good idea to ask if she meant what she said on the phone? Or could that scare her away if I mention it again, dont want it sounding like I'm pestering her.

Thanks for reading, again.

Former Member

well what i meant was that when you ask them out, ask them out face to face. Like when you tell them you want to be with them. But if your just going to ask her about it, phone is the best option if your not going to be able to see her. Try not to be nervous. Honestly, you should be able to talk to her about it with out having to worry about what she thinks. If I were you, ask her if she really does want to go out or if she was just telling you that because she didn't want to hurt you. Tell her to tell you the truth and that it won't affect your friendship. If she still says that she wants to go out, then you will have to try another approach. Just ask her about why she isn't ready. Just tell her that you want to be more then friends. Stuff like that ya know?