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im just not sure
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
its been almost 2 years wid my bf n iv loved him wid all my heart... now its been 8 months dat we havent even seen eacother n now il b seeing him in the summers for sure...right now i chat wid him for long hours on msn n the fone too...he says he loves me too n is ready for sex but im just not sure abt it...its not that i dont love him i do but sex is big time comitment for me n its not dat big a deal for him...its my 1st time not his n he says he needs sex...i wonder wat makes me unsure abt sex...mayb my morals, values, religion... but shudnt he understand..or am i being unfair??? i need help guys
im fine wid kissing n making out cuz i really do like'em
he might LEAVE me if im firm abt it
im fine wid kissing n making out cuz i really do like'em
he might LEAVE me if im firm abt it
0
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If you don't feel ready for sex then don't have it.
thats what i was thinking!
yupp hes gone abroad to study
you're always thinking what I'm thinking!
Here you go:
It's been almost 2 years with my boyfriend & I've loved him with all my heart. Now it's been 8 months that we haven't even seen each other & now I'll be seeing him in the summer for sure.
Right now I chat with him for long hours on msn & the phone to. He says he loves me to & is ready for sex but i'm just not sure about it. It's not that i don't love him i do but sex is a big time commitment for me & it's not that big a deal for him.
It's my 1st time but not his & he says he needs sex. I wonder what makes me unsure about sex. Maybe my morals, values, religion, but shouldn't he understand or am i being unfair???
I need help guys
I'm fine with kissing & making out because I really do like him but he might LEAVE me if i'm firm about it.
Happy now that you can read it
lol stop stealing my thoughts!!
and if you think 8 months is long it shows shes got morals (not saying you lot aint but i respect people for that)
how does 8 months show that she has morals?
well its true iv been all good for 8 months no hanky panky
even though my bf kinda acted weird wen he reachd dere but soon the fever was over n he missed nav n good times too
im usually quite patient with text talk but that was just ridiculous.
i didn't understand it either
but holding out for 8 months would show she had moral standing, i dunno
also...when you're a moderator for a sydney teen dance party thingy you get very used to text type.
...it aint that hard to read. It irritates me too but you know.... obviously people do it so yeahhh...
Yah as for you....just spend some time wif him see how ya feel
anyway....good luck
Nav, the way you're talking about this relationship makes it sound very much as if he's just using you. Of course we don't know the whole story, but going on what you've said, you don't feel ready to lose your virginity but your boyfriend's pressuring you to do it. Saying he 'needs sex' etc is ridiculous, and of course he should be more understanding! If you're fine with making out but no more, then leave it at that. If he can't deal with it, he's not worth being with. And if he leaves you if you won't sleep with him, what kind of person is he? Surely not someone you want to waste your time on.
Also, the way you say it's not that big a deal for him - sounds as if he really doesn't see it as a serious thing taking your virginity. He just wants to get laid. He reeeeally sounds like bad news, and to be honest I don't think he's worth it. Do you really want to wait 8 months for this guy?
Anyway I'm getting a bit judgmental now so I'll shut up, but you get the picture...
Nav - I know it's seemed like everyone's had a go at you about the text talk thing but we do ask that people don't use it on the boards here as it excludes those that don't use it all the time.
Everyone else - it's probably best to explain to people why they shouldn't use text talk rather than just expecting them to know... that way no one feels attacked which'll just add insult to injury if they're already feeling down.
CB
Um, that's all very well and good, but people do need sex. Not in some kind of 'Oh my God, if I don't get sex I'm going to die' kind of way, but within a relationship sex is important for that relationship to be healthy.
I don't know how old she/he is and of course it's different if she's young, but just because the guy wants sex doesn't make him a bad person. He's obviously been waiting a long time too (or am I wrong?) so it's not like he's the big evil man only out for sex. He's been with her a long time, if he just wanted sex then I'm sure he could just go fuck someone.
If someone made me wait God knows how long I'd leave them too. Two years is far too long, but like I said, it's different if shes young.
agreed, I think it just sounds a lot worse because she's not seen him in a long while and is very nervous :-s
They have being together for 2yrs, surely most people would want to take the relationship to the next level after this length of time.
I agree if its not what she wants then she shouldn't be pressured into doing it but LadyNightingale saying "he shouldn't even ask" is just plain stupid.
I waited a year to have sex with my boyfriend. Ther's nothing wrong with being sure
So what if she's actually saving herself until she gets married? So because it's been two years that automatically entitles him to pussy? WTF? Don't you think she has some say in it? He shouldn't even ask, from the way she made it sound he's been begging and begging and she don't want to give it up, that is her perogative. So NO, he shouldn't even ask, and now he's trying to manipulate. What's STUPID is there are people here that think she should give it up because it's been two years. What's STUPID is if she is trying to save herself, some people gotta dog her out instead of encouraging her.
Girl, your bf is a slimeball and from this thread, he's in good company. Let him go and go find yourself someone decent.
I'm starting to believe that there's no hope at all for the future generation. No human respect at all from what it looks like. Yes, I'm being judgemental, I'm looking at each young lady here as someones daughter. As well as each young man as someones son.
"Nav, the way you're talking about this relationship makes it sound very much as if he's just using you. Of course we don't know the whole story, but going on what you've said, you don't feel ready to lose your virginity but your boyfriend's pressuring you to do it. Saying he 'needs sex' etc is ridiculous, and of course he should be more understanding! If you're fine with making out but no more, then leave it at that. If he can't deal with it, he's not worth being with. And if he leaves you if you won't sleep with him, what kind of person is he? Surely not someone you want to waste your time on."
See, this is what I'm talking about. Who the fuck NEEDS sex so bad that they feel they should pressure someone into it. Go pay someone for goodness sake, or jack off. Just make sure to name it STUPID as your flushing it down the toilet. :rolleyes:
Yeah, cos wanking really compares to sex. :yeees: All I said that it's not wrong for him to want sex. Because it's not. They've been together, TWO YEARS. Who realistically wants to wait that long?
Maybe in some people heres pretend lovey dovey world where people don't get horny and stay together purely for love
If he is pressuring her all the time, then yeah, he's a dick, but I bet if it were the other way round and some woman were nagging about how her boyfriend won't fuck her then a bunch of women would be up in arms saying there's something 'wrong' with him.
"They have being together for 2yrs, surely most people would want to take the relationship to the next level after this length of time." That's also assuming we are talking about an adult relationship too.
Quoted by DaisyChainThing- "If he is pressuring her all the time, then yeah, he's a dick, but I bet if it were the other way round and some woman were nagging about how her boyfriend won't fuck her then a bunch of women would be up in arms saying there's something 'wrong' with him."
No, because if it were me and he wouldn't give it up, I'd move around. I wouldn't want to be pressured myself, so why do it to someone else?