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Trust

I dunno why i'm posting this but i guess i just wanna get it outta my system.

I've been thinking a lot about stuff lately, which i hate coz i end up thinking about stuff which makes me depressed & shit.

Ne way i've realised that i don't really trust ne1, it takes me ages 2 trust ppl & when i eventually do they usually do sumthing which makes me unable 2 trust them again. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif"&gt;

I'm also an incredibly paranoid person, i always think ppl are saying or doin stuff behind my back & this not only pisses me off but also the ppl i'm close 2. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif"&gt;

I woz just wondering if ne1 else is like this or if ne1 has been like this but managed 2 change themselves & get rid of feeling this way?!
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im like that, i dont trust anyone apart from my family cos anytime i do i always end up being hurt. i guess one day though u'll find that one person (or maybe more) who u can trust and who wont let u down <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    U never said how old u was? I'm guessing u r younger than me (25), if so I think that everyone goes through a period of feeling this way. Just believe in yourself and know that u need 2 b more confident. This is not a put down, just maybe a bit of self-help, I hope.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Im trying to help myself at the moment, with my whole trust problem, but yes I am like that! Ive had a few bad experiences in the past and as a result all my relationships (friends included) have ended in someone hurting me or breaking the bit of trust I had in them!

    Im only just realising, that a lot of the time, the problem in the end was with me and the kind of people Id let myself end up with! kind of like I kept punishing myself by meeting people that I knew were bad news but thought I deserved nothing better!

    A friend of mine (who funnilly enough I trust more than anyone in the world) said to me just last night that everyone feels they cant trust people completly. This is because there r different areas in which u have trust and u might trust them in one area but not the other!

    If this is confusing then an example is... u have a friend who u r really close to and trust them with being reliable and maybe u trust them with being there for u when u need them, but u dont trust that they wont try and nick your boyfriend!

    The truth is, very few people can be trusted in everything in life but that dont mean u cant trust anyone at all!

    Me personally, Im starting to put my trust into people again coz I no if I dont then Ill always feel alone, coz I dont let myself get close to people etc. I dont want to be on my own all my life and the only way of not being that way, is to give people a chnace instead of assuming they will end up hurting me b4 I have even got to know them fully!

    It isnt easy though and I find myself feeling really vulnerable but theres no other option if I wanna help myself be able to trust people. One thing I do think is important for some people is to go with your gut feeling, mine is usually right! Hope this is some help anyway <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don`t trust anyone, including my family.
    I have a problem, I speak to someone on the net anonymously. Or I keep it to myself.
    This probly isn`t what u want to hear but to me, trust isn`t worth it. U trust someone, they`ll screw you over eventually and leave you looking like a fool.
    Not trusting anyone may mean I`ll be alone the rest of my life, but atleast I`ll have some dignity left.
    Sorry for that rant, sort of defeated all the positive input. That was intended to be a positive post but my negative side won out.


    "Honesty is just an excuse for lack of imagination."
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah, I find it hard to trust people, but thast cos of my problems.

    I find taht its easier to talk about deep stuff on here raather tahn to 'real' people, stranbely enough.

    (im not exactly sober, so dontmind the spellin <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif">)

    It matters not who won or lost, but how you place the blame.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have problems trusting people because I've been hurt in the past. I've suffered from depressiona and shit loads, very often, being around people makes it worse.

    Fab_uk, you're not alone, I get totally paranoid at times too and I have very few friends which I feel I can trust. I often prefer to be alone than with other people, but I know that being alone only makes me more depressed.
  • Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    Originally posted by Kermit:
    I find taht its easier to talk about deep stuff on here raather tahn to 'real' people, stranbely enough.

    yeah i do. although i dont go round trusting everyone with everything... i used to be too trusting and got hurt a few times, yes, off the net, people can hurt you by the net.... so now im more careful. sometimes i can just feel that i can trust someone, even though ive not met them or talked to them for long. sometimes they prove me wrong, but a lot of the time, they dont. i dont trust many people who i hang out with where i live really.. maybe one. and my mum. but i dont tell her everything, there are some things you just cant tell your mum <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; especially when she tends to tell your dad <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/eek.gif"&gt;

    Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am goin thru the whole doubt thing right now, i suppose its cause i never had very many friends in school (i had lots of "problems" which made people not want to get involved with me) and i was bullied a lot. Now im in college ive made some really close friends an i can be myself, but ive always got it in the back of my mind that someday they will screww me over like everyone else ive been close too.

    I find it helps to try and forget about it, dont try to test their trust or anything cause that can screw things up even more.

    Oh and for some reason i dont really trust my family, its probably because i know they will tell each other about important stuff i tell them cause ive seen them do it, but i guess its no major deal, well i dont see it as.

    And i have one good friend who i trust implicitly,i never have doubts or anything about him, i know he will always stick up for me an never tell a soul what i tell him, i think its a good idea to get at least one person like this, although i admit its not easy to.

    All ive done in this post is winge about my problems and not really helped you, sorry about that, but it mite be comfortin to know there are loadsa other ppl just like u.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey thanx u guys, u have all helped a lot <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    I feel a bit better now, i've just been on a bit of a downer the past couple of weeks. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif"&gt;

    Its good 2 know i'm not alone in thinking this way i just wish i didn't!!

    But thanx again u have been a lot of help <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    Oh yeah & trinity i'm 16 <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
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