Cant think of a subject name for this

Former Member

Theres a girl I've met recently. We spoke on the net for about a month but are now proper mates offline because we live local and got on great.
Anyway, when we do still speak online, she occasionally says stuff like calling me sweet, cute, sexy, etc. and flirts as if she likes me.

Do girls often say stuff like that without meaning it? I'd like to ask her out but only would if I was sure she liked me.

I'm too shy to try do it otherwise incase of rejection. I've never had a gf before so I'm inexperienced with all this stuff I'm asking about, I dont have a clue!

Thanks.

Former Member

Yes, girls often say things like that without meaning it. It's just flirting with no intent. Watch out for it in pubs & clubs as they're most likely trying to pricktease a drink out of you.
However, in this case, there might be something there. But you know what I'm going to say - there's only one way to find out, and that's to talk with her, and tell her how you feel. Either she'll say yes, or no (if she lets you down gently then it may sound like a maybe when she really means no). If she says no, then you'll either stay friends, or not speak again. You won't know unless you ask.
Weigh up what you've got to gain against what you've got to loose. You could gain a girlfriend, or at least keep a good friend, and either of those are good, yes? Or you could loose a friend, and someone who doesn't have any deep feelings for you anyway.
I don't know her, and you've only given us a sketchy outline of the situation, so it's impossible to say what will happen. I reckon she'll either say yes, or let you down gently and will remain a friend as long as you realise that there's never going to be a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship there.
There's only one way to know though, and that's to tell her, and ask her.

Mr_Wobble

Former Member

How about the next time you're online together you do the same back (call her sexy,cute etc..) try flirting with her and see how she reacts, if she backs away then it was probably not meant to be but if she laps it up then take a chance and ask her out?
or you could take her to a nightclub and after a while ask her to dance then dance close with her - if she likes you you'll probably end up all over each other, thats what happened to me anyway.
Good luck!

Former Member

Girls do sometimes say that without meaning it, personally i dont, but to give you a bit of a booster, me and my boyfriend met on the net and it was me doing all the flirting to start off with, we decided to meet up as he only lives up the road from me(i didn't even know who he was before this, coincedence i know) and we've now been together for two years, so it could work, just start flirting back and see how she reacts :thumb:

Former Member

How does she react in real life around you- does she flirt but in a very shy and reserved way? Somewhere on this fine website there's an article on reading body language, have a gander so you can tell if it's flirting or just niceness.

But the internet is so awful because you can't read body language as well as the words. So ask her, maybe gently nudge at it. (Though don't nudge too gently, t'missus thought I fancied a mutual friend for ages )

Former Member

She now knows I have some kind of problem. Got a little depressed over it and she picked up on that. She just doesnt know its do with her. Did say I can feel free to tell her about problems and stuff.

I'm gonna be drunk on tuesday, decided to say something then. Unless I still lose my bottle! Well will soon see.

Well, thanks again.

Former Member

Originally posted by shyBloke2
I'm gonna be drunk on tuesday, decided to say something then. Unless I still lose my bottle!

Um... i wouldnt if i were you, things you dont want people to hear tend to come out more when you're drunk, and also emotions are a lot higher so when you just want to tell her you like her and want to go out with her you might end up coffessing your (false) undying love for her and how you want her to have your kids etc..

Former Member

And if you're drunk, she might not take what you say seriously.

Former Member

The thing about saying more than I mean like I wanna have her kids and stuff wouldnt be a problem. I did once tell someone I liked her when drunk, and didnt do that. Personally I dont THINK I'd have that problem.
As for her not taking me seriously... well that might happen and never really thought of that.

Well they're both good points. Just gonna go and think about it for a bit.

Former Member

a lad i know always tells me how sexy i am etc when he's drunk. although i believe him i don't take it seriously so the next time i see him when sobre i pretend it never happened.

i think she may just laugh and not know whether you're being serious so perhaps it's not a good idea. then the next day there will be this sobre awkwardness like should you say something about what you said or wait for her to.

your best bet is to not get down about this probelm because it's not attractive. instead just flirt with her more online and if you don't already, then give her a complement or two and see how she reacts. then maybe you can move it towards telling her you like her.

good lucketh