Just be yourself ?!!

Former Member

I've read many of the threads asking "how do I get people to notice me", and the overwhelming answer seems to be "just be yourself". But here is my problem - my character sucks.

I am quite shy, and find it hard to talk to anyone, even close friends. At parties I just shrink away and do nothing noticeable, because I don't particularly like attention. But as I get older this will present more and more problems. I have trouble not being self conscious and forgetting that other people's opinions aren't always important. But I don't like the way I am, and am finding it hard to change :-(

Former Member

Are you any good with just one person. it's always easier to mingle if you know one persona nd they can introduce you, people then throw themselves at you talking (can be quite scary). If i'm int he slightest mood, i show it really well....... not a good point!!! so i sometimes seem unapproachable!

Former Member

Yes i do understand your point, as i was always like that, but the sad thing is that u have 2 grab the chances when they r there, cause its a thing that develops after a certain period of time and experience(s), there's hope 4 us all, u have 2 force ur self 2 think positive!

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Open the Doors of Perception...........................................................

Former Member

I'm gonna have to agree with the person above.

Coming here, hoping for some miracle way of changing your personality isn't gonna help.

YOU have to make the first step, we cant do it for you. Trust me on this, if you are at a party or something make a point of getting up and dancing (i'm a terrible dancer, but do it anyway, its fun and i dont mind making a pratt out of myself once in a while <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif">)

Just relax, if people talk to you, make an effort to have a conversation, not just a YES or NO response.

YOU need to put in some effort.

And i KNOW you can do it <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

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Be yourself, baby!

Former Member

I know it's all up to me!!

My problem is that I'm seen as a boff at school, so am used to people making fun of me if I do ANYTHING embarrassing. This has made me just a little self-conscious. As a result, I find it very hard to let go and relax when around other people.

It's a vicious circle - I'm not confident, so I don't do much, so I'm not confident etc. Another problem is that I don't get invited out as much as I'd like. And even when I do, my parents usually don't let me go.

But I realise that I need to overcome these hurdles and get confidence. The hard part is doing it.

Former Member

Openup, I don't know if you're old enough, but if you are get a Saturday job in sales. I was shy til about 15/16 when I started working in a shoe shop. Because of the nature of the shop I had to sit down with customers and start a conversation with them. At first it was hard cos I was like "What do you say??", but then after a while I came out of myself and became a natural. After 6 months of doing it we had competitions as to who could get the most phone numbers and I usually won.

Get out and about more and build your self confidence, don't stay hidden away in books studying!