Why do we tell people our secrets?

Former Member

I was pondering this earlier on, but why do we tell people secrets? It just seems like no matter how secret something is someone else always gets told. Or am I wrong?- Do tell if I am.

I thought the reason we tell certain people only is because we trust them, but why do we need to tell them? Thats what I'm saying.

I think a lager too many

Former Member

because we have a thirst for gossip and excitement.


the juicier the secret, the greater our urge to tell it to everyone we know.

Former Member

it's because we need people to share and witness our lives. it's a very human condition. to have knowledge that you cannot share can be intolerable ...if there is no other human you can 'share' ...your troubles and woes with, even over one incident...it can be very lonely.

Former Member

There are some secrets that will never be told!

But yeah. I think little secrets, are just too impossible to keep to yourself sometimes, not that I would go blabbing them to everybody but I would probably share it with my best friend or Mum, sometimes it helps if its a problem then it can take the pressure off you and stop you worrying.

And if its not a problem, its gossip or something then its just fun sharing it with someone who you know won't say anything

Has anyone got any friends who you just wouldn't tell anything to? I've got one that I would never ever tell a secret to, shes got the biggest mouth ever, she doesnt mean to let things slip she just does, its the way she is!

Former Member

Originally posted by morrocan roll
to have knowledge that you cannot share can be intolerable ...if there is no other human you can 'share' ...your troubles and woes with, even over one incident...it can be very lonely.

Yes.

I have fuckloads of drinking buddies, but only about two or three people who I could even begin to confide in.

But yeah, secrets kinda stop being secrets when you blab about them.

Former Member

well it depends on what kind of secrets, i mean when its gossip i find its more so that you have someone you can talk to about it and gives you something to discuss if ya get what i mean.

But other secrects yeah i think its because it takes the weight off your shoulders not having to kep it to yourself.

hmm not making much sense oh well

Former Member

I have plenty secrets to tell; but I won't. I won't because they are either daft things, or things I think/feel that will result in responses I don't want from people, or things in general.

I will tell things to some people some things because I respect the closeness that I have with them: I know what I say will be secure with them, so I'm satisfied it won't go oot and aboot, eh?

Former Member

Originally posted by 1983
I have plenty secrets to tell; but I won't. I won't because they are either daft things, or things I think/feel that will result in responses I don't want from people, or things in general.

I will tell things to some people some things because I respect the closeness that I have with them: I know what I say will be secure with them, so I'm satisfied it won't go oot and aboot, eh?

i believe that every human at some point has an awfull secret they cannot tell. even if only to console the widow of a bad man. to conceal how serious someones illness realy is as you watch them die slowly and painfully. as you get older and more worn and torn by lifes events ...and you startvto hyave these kind of secrets ...think back to me ...'aye i remember rolly saying this back in 03 ...but he didn't have a clue how to deal with it either'.

Former Member

Originally posted by morrocan roll
...think back to me ...'aye i remember rolly saying this back in 03 ...but he didn't have a clue how to deal with it either'.

The disturbing thing is I probobly will. Thanks for your preach Rolleh, and the rest of you. I'm feeling... Englightened .

Former Member

Originally posted by Capacity
The disturbing thing is I probobly will. Thanks for your preach Rolleh, and the rest of you. I'm feeling... Englightened .

hey ...it's all free as well! has harley street been boarded up yet?

Former Member

I tend to only want to tell people secrets because it lets them know that I trust them and consider them a good friend.

There are plenty of people I won't tell my secrets to, though. Normally if it's something that's really really upset me, I only tell people who I don't know that well and will probably never see again, because it saves me worrying that they're going to be asking how I am all the time and worrying about me. I hate that :mad:

Former Member

i always end up telling the wrong person, who proceeds to tell everyone, just because she comes over as so trusting, but last time was one too many times for me, she crossed the line telling everyone something important and i dont trust her anymore

Former Member

Well, from my own personal experience, I have had many friends, who have told my secret/s to others, but I do have those 2 friends, who don't do that to me, so I can really, truly trust those two people, even though it's hard for me to trust people, with many secrets, that I just can not tell others.

Former Member

Guilt is a major factor, telling someone else kind of takes the pressure off and unloads a bit on to someone else, if for a short time. Then the guilt comes of telling the secret.....

Former Member

I just like telling people stuff

Former Member

Originally posted by Whowhere
I just like telling people stuff

Stretch a little furthur and ask why.

Former Member

a few of you might already know this about me, i know one person who posted in this thread knows... The reason i tell people secrets is usually cos i cant deal with the whole emotional overload of everything, but i am improving

but if it's something deep and related to someone else then i would sooo never tell it.

Former Member

Makes me feel less guilty about talking to someone if they know the kind of person I used to be (ie: troll weirdo ugh dontwannagothere) and the person I could potentially be again. But because I'm not that person - because I'm me. It makes my life story seem to work out.

That's the secrets about me. Secret about other people I just tell because it's usually funny as fuck or scandalous.

Former Member

Originally posted by Snow White
I tend to only want to tell people secrets because it lets them know that I trust them and consider them a good friend.

There are plenty of people I won't tell my secrets to, though. Normally if it's something that's really really upset me, I only tell people who I don't know that well and will probably never see again, because it saves me worrying that they're going to be asking how I am all the time and worrying about me. I hate that :mad:

that is the exact same as me. I don't like telling people my secrets because it makes me feel vulnerable, what to I don't know. I prefer no one knowing what's wrong than someone knowing I'm hurt or upset. I'm just a secretive, messed up person :yes:

Former Member

I don't tell other people's secrets, but I'm such a worrier that I usually need someone's input if I'm fretting about someone. No matter how secret it is... within reason!

But some secrets just eat you up. Before people knew I'm gay I felt so crap when people assumed I was straight or made gay jokes because I didn't have the guts to come out.

Former Member

I don't bother telling people secrets. If you don't want people to know you should keep it to yourself, cos 99% of the time it will get passed on :rolleyes:

Former Member

Originally posted by Faith
I don't bother telling people secrets. If you don't want people to know you should keep it to yourself, cos 99% of the time it will get passed on :rolleyes:

I pretty much can trust me friends. Or I tell you guys, 'cos you don't know me!

Former Member

Originally posted by piccolo
I don't tell other people's secrets, but I'm such a worrier that I usually need someone's input if I'm fretting about someone. No matter how secret it is... within reason!

But some secrets just eat you up. Before people knew I'm gay I felt so crap when people assumed I was straight or made gay jokes because I didn't have the guts to come out.

well done pic. i don't actualy go with this having the guts thing. i think there is a time to sow ...a time to reap ...a time to relax a time to work ...a time to be quiet and ...a time to tell.
i hope it's been positive for you being honest.
someone in this thread said something about themselves being a secretive fucked up person ...try dropping the secrecy and i think you'll go along way to becoming unfucked.

Former Member

Originally posted by morrocan roll

someone in this thread said something about themselves being a secretive fucked up person ...try dropping the secrecy and i think you'll go along way to becoming unfucked.

me maybe? i said messed up lol plus i cant become unsecretive, for personal reasons

Former Member

Originally posted by hybrid
i cant become unsecretive, for personal reasons

i've been there mate. i am still there to a degree. financial etc. if your a crook then you have to carry many secrets ...when you no longer want to be a crook but a mr respectable ...sincere ...honest ...trustworthy ...loyal ...loving ...mr normal ...there can be secrets you realy don't need in your head anylonger. thats something i had to deal with.
come on ...tell me why you have to be a secretive person ...lie to me if you must but remember ...the lies we tell say a lot about us.

Former Member

Originally posted by morrocan roll
i've been there mate. i am still there to a degree. financial etc. if your a crook then you have to carry many secrets ...when you no longer want to be a crook but a mr respectable ...sincere ...honest ...trustworthy ...loyal ...loving ...mr normal ...there can be secrets you realy don't need in your head anylonger. thats something i had to deal with.
come on ...tell me why you have to be a secretive person ...lie to me if you must but remember ...the lies we tell say a lot about us.

oh ur making me feel bad im secretive because im the kinda gal who'd rather deal with her own emotions privately, than have people know whats wrong and keep questioning me. its easier for me to deal and move on on my own and that wasn't a lie :angel:

Former Member

Originally posted by hybrid
oh ur making me feel bad im secretive because im the kinda gal who'd rather deal with her own emotions privately, than have people know whats wrong and keep questioning me. its easier for me to deal and move on on my own and that wasn't a lie :angel:

i'll put a tenner on it your good at sorting other people out ...

Former Member

Originally posted by morrocan roll
i'll put a tenner on it your good at sorting other people out ...

yup that I am

Former Member

Re: Why do we tell people our secrets?

Originally posted by Capacity
I was pondering this earlier on, but why do we tell people secrets? It just seems like no matter how secret something is someone else always gets told. Or am I wrong?- Do tell if I am.

I thought the reason we tell certain people only is because we trust them, but why do we need to tell them? Thats what I'm saying.

I think a lager too many

Well, I think that the reason why we tell people secrets is because we trust them, enough, to tell them this secret and that they won't tell anyone else and that you can trust them, enough, to tell them this secret, that you won't have to worry about it being told unto others as long as the secret is told in total and complete secracy, as well as not ever being told told to someone or ones that you don't know or trust.

Former Member

Maybe someone should do a website where you can tell the whole planet your secret but of course no one knows who you are so you get it off your chest that way but still keep your secret...


So you can tell the whole world you slept with your brother-in-law or something but they won't know who you are!!!

Former Member

there is one! its a confession thing! its been posted before!