HELP: GF's Pain after sex

Former Member

Okay, me and my girlfriend have had sex quite alot in the past week, its all been fine (well, its hurt her a little, but thats because we've both not done it alot)

However, the other day, we had a rest from sex, and i just fingered her, (perhaps slightly rougher than usual)

The next day, whenever she went to the toilet, she got a really bad pain in her lady bits, however, later that day, well night, it went away.

The next day, we had sex, and she compained of pains in her stomach (she had experianced this before when we had sex, so we just took things a little slower but carried on)

However, today shes complainin that she cant pee again, and she was bleedin very slightly


She has an appointment at her doctors, HOWEVER her mother is going with her, who doesn't know that we are active (sexually) - we are both 14

What is the doctor likely to do, as we are both worried about her mum finding out.

I thought he would just take a urine sample and test for a kidney infection or something? its just i know if he looks down there, he'll know shes not a virgin, and perhaps suggest that she just irritated something down there when having sex, only saying this with her mum in the room will get her killed, (perhaps literally!), she definantly wouldn't be allowed out that house,


Her mum is a complete control freak, and has been giving my GF a hard time all week for no reason, im sure shes going through the menopause or somtehing, my gf cant say anything without being accused of having a attitude problem - anyway thats beside the point



Could anybody please help as to what the doctors likily to do, and allowed to say while her mother is in the room?

Former Member

you cant tell someones not a virgin just by looking at their parts. thats silly.

Former Member

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Former Member

Even though her mother is a control freak, can't she just say she doesn't feel comfortable with her mother in the room, and explain that to the doctor/nurse. I know that will upset her mother, but it's worth a try I suppose. She really needs to be able to tell the doctor exactly what the problem is.
If she can't get away with that, and her mother is there, and she doesn't want to (understandably) say what may have caused the problem, then she can only hope the doctor can tell she doesn't want her mother to know, and is discreet enough about it.
As an alternative to admitting she's had sex, maybe she could say she was masturbating. Still embarassing, but less problematical than saying she's had sex and been fingered.

Mr_Wobble

Former Member

Admit it mate, 14!!!!!!!

Come on your still children, thats a bit young for that, you could of waited at least another year...

The doctor will most likey say youve irritated something, best thing is to ask your gf to tell her mum to wait outside...

Surely you dont want to see your kids bits??!?!?!

Former Member

Your girlfriend can try and tell her mum that she would rather she waited outside in the waiting room, but her mum may refuse to let her go in on her own. If she can visit alone, try calling NHS Direct beforehand to see what the legal situation is with under 16s and confidentiality:

NHS Direct
Advice and information on all health-related issues.
Telephone: 0845 46 47
Website: www.nhsdirect.nhs.uk

Alternatively, she could call a specialist helpline or arrange an appointment at one of their clinics:

Brook Advisory Centres
Advice, counselling and medical help around contraception, pregnancy, abortion and sexual health.
Telephone: 0800 0185023

Family Planning Association
Information service on family planning and all aspects of sexual health.
Helpline: 0845 3101334
www.fpa.org.uk

You can also get lots of good advice about contraception and STIs at either of the above clinics. If you are having sex regularly it is importnat to have a reliable form of contraception, as well as protecting against STIs wby using condoms.

Former Member

I think if your GF went alone it should remain confidental unless the doctor perceived she was in any great danger or anything. It may be possible that they don't even ask if shes sexually active, she may just have a bladder infection or something.

If her mum is in the room and the doctor asks though her mum is going to find out so the only solution if she really wants to keep it secret is to go alone or get her mum to wait outside.

Former Member

Why did she tell her mum she needed to go to the docters? Tell her not to tell the doc she is having sex, then the next day make a new appointment without her mum knowing.

Former Member

No her mother doesn't have to stay in the room if your gf doesn't want her too. Afterall if your gf is mature enough to have sex then she's mature enough to say to her mum she doesn't want her in the room, plus she's like, 14 so she prolly doesn't want her mum there for such a personal thing. I think by law the doctor can't discuss your gf's problems, but cos she is under 16 i dunno if her mum has the right to know or not, being legal guardian and all, I really dunno. But I think cos this sounds quite serious, like maybe a bladder infection or summit, that she shud mention it to her mum. afterall are you practising safe sex and stuff. her mum will think it's much more responsible if u tell her the truth, rather than her finding out through a doctor.
Keep us updated, and ummm try and be a bit gentler on ur gf, sex shud'n't be so painful and rough that u make her bleed!

Aleox

Former Member

no comment on the age or mother issues from me, but as for the actual problem, i had a 2 girlfriends who had exactly the same problem.....

i dont know what the medical definition of it is, but lots of sex, or any activity, especially the rough kind can cause pains and bleeding especially if she hasnt done it much and you've been at it a lot recently.......one of my girlfriends bled a little after sex a few times when we first started sleeping together and had some stomach pains too (she had only had sex once before me).....another it hurt when she pee'd and had tummy pains...(only one previous partner)......apparently its quite a regular problem.

hope that rambling ramble was of a little help.
Peace Out