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I have no idea what to do I need your help!!!!!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
There is this girl I have loved since the first day of high school, she has always been on my mind and she told me the other day she wanted to kiss me a couple weeks ago but she couldnt because she has a boyfriend. Me and her are really clciking and we really trust each other, however right now I have a girlfriend, and I think that mayeb me and the other girl are meant to be??????
What should I do?????

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hey johnfred, welcome to thesite. it's a nice place with nice people. stay awhile. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    the first thing you have to do is sort yourself out. take some time and figure out what you really want. you're with your current gf for a reason. is this other girl worth breaking another girl's heart over? and if it is, be fair and do it quickly, otherwise you're just leading your current gf on. and that's not fair to her.

    but before you go breaking up... you really also need to find out if this first girl is willing to be break up her current relationship to be with you. based on what you've said here, i don't think so, yet. saying she wants to kiss you is not "i love you with all my heart." and she seemed unwilling to break up with her boyfriend, because that stopped her from acting on her urge to kiss you. she sounds confused to me, and her not knowing what she wants is a long way from knowing she wants you.

    what i'm trying to say is, if she is the one, don't deny yourself a chance, but don't chase that chance on a wing and a prayer. if this first girl doesn't break and stays with her current bf.. then you could end up with nothing and hurt your current gf and yourself in the process.

    but you know the risks. when in doubt, follow your heart. if it works out, awesome. if you end up hurt, at least you won't regret the decision you made, because you went for what would have made you happiest.

    good luck dude.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Calvin:
    when in doubt, follow your heart. if it works out, awesome. if you end up hurt, at least you won't regret the decision you made, because you went for what would have made you happiest.

    Awwwwwwhhhhh Calvin that is so sweet! <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; And very good advice too.

    It's no good staying with your present girlfriend if you're going to see her as second best all the time JohnFred, because that's not fair on either her or you. Try being just friends with her for the moment and see where things lead. And take Calvin's advice because it's excellent.


    [This message has been edited by wildchild (edited 27-06-2001).]
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    *sigh*

    yeah, what calvin and wildchild said.

    "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
    ~ Nietzsche
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think you should go for the girl who's not your girlfriend.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by [*cRimSOnCoLUmbiA*]:
    I think you should go for the girl who's not your girlfriend.

    Is that just because you split a guy and his girl up?

    Or would you dump your boyfriend if someone else came along?

    A woman smokes as she waits for the eclipse.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by jeffrey:
    Is that just because you split a guy and his girl up?

    Or would you dump your boyfriend if someone else came along?


    Haha, no I just think that you shouldn't get soo serious about someone in high school. We're still young so why not date around? That's the only way you're going to TRULy find out if you two were meant to be.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Calvin thanks for the advice man it helps out a lot!!!!!
    But The other girl I think I do like her a lot and I can see us two together for a really long time. The girl Im with now I dont see much of a future. I ahte to say it but its true. I need some more imput that will help me make my decision.

    Thanks Calvin
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by JohnFred:
    But The other girl I think I do like her a lot and I can see us two together for a really long time.

    Then go for it man!


    A woman smokes as she waits for the eclipse.
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    if you see no future with your gf then you have to end it asap to save you all getting more hurt. you need to sort out this relationship first before you start thinking about the next. if you ask this other girl out, and your gf finds out, she's gonna be mega-hurt. trust me. she's still gonna be hurt if she finds out you broke up with her for someone else, and if you get with the other girl soon after ending it with your gf. try and not mention the other girl to your gf, she doesnt need to know about that, just tell her why you dont think the relationship is working/gonna work out. just make it about your relationship, and not outside factors.

    then once you have this sorted, you need to work out whether you see enough future with this other girl to tell her, and face possible rejection. yes, you may end up with neither of them. but surely its better to know that you tried, and as the saying goes "its better to regret the things you have done than the things you havent". and if you see no future with this girl, then its better to end it sooner, rather than later, when it will be a lot messier and more painful for her, especially.

    why can i sort out other people's relationships but not my own? maybe i should send people to read all these threads ive been sighing in.

    "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
    ~ Nietzsche
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Girl-From-Mars:
    if you get with the other girl soon after ending it with your gf, try and not mention the other girl to your gf, she doesnt need to know about that, just tell her why you dont think the relationship is working/gonna work out.

    That happened at the end of one of my relationships but we were sharing a flat at the time, so it was pretty likely he was gonna find out. He was well pissed but it was definitly for the best so i'm glad.
    "its better to regret the things you have done than the things you havent".

    I was gonna put that but I thought i'd save it for you <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    A woman smokes as she waits for the eclipse.
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    Originally posted by jeffrey:
    That happened at the end of one of my relationships but we were sharing a flat at the time, so it was pretty likely he was gonna find out. He was well pissed but it was definitly for the best so i'm glad.

    always messy <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/frown.gif"&gt; even if you dont go out with the other person. <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; and if you're in a serious relationship and the other starts going out with someone soon after - painful, i can tell you from experience.
    I was gonna put that but I thought i'd save it for you <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;


    <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt; hehe thank you <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/biggrin.gif"&gt;

    "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
    ~ Nietzsche
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I just want to say thank you to all the people who helped me out with my problem, it made it alot clearer for me to decide what I want to do. Now I have to sit and think what I want more.

    Thanks to Everyone

    "The hardest thing to do in life is watch the person you love, love someone else"
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by JohnFred:

    "The hardest thing to do in life is watch the person you love, love someone else"

    or trying to swallow a bowling ball.

    <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/tongue.gif"&gt; <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Calvin:
    or trying to swallow a bowling ball.

    NO THATS WHAT IT FEELS LIKE
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by [*cRimSOnCoLUmbiA*]:
    Haha, no I just think that you shouldn't get soo serious about someone in high school.

    I will choose not to hear that...

    Those are models legs, but are they womans or are they mens?
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    Girl-From-MarsGirl-From-Mars Posts: 2,822 Boards Guru
    Originally posted by TheEgoHasLanded:
    I will choose not to hear that...


    me too.

    johnfred, i know what you mean. ive got the bowling ball feeling at the mo too, only with added spikes and strangeness. dont even ASK...

    glad we could help tho <IMG alt="image" SRC="http://www.thesite.org/ubb/smile.gif"&gt;

    "That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
    ~ Nietzsche
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    the_Paranoid_bunnythe_Paranoid_bunny Posts: 487 Listening Ear
    emma, you are soooo online! are you afraid of messenger?
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    the_Paranoid_bunnythe_Paranoid_bunny Posts: 487 Listening Ear
    Originally posted by the_Paranoid_bunny:
    emma, you are soooo online! are you afraid of messenger?

    oh wait.... i understand now...
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