what am I supposed to do?

Former Member

ka

Former Member

is she worth all this?

i mean honestly?

Former Member

Everyone has a past! she slept with him when she wasn't going out with you...since then the love you have for eachother has deepened and now you are officially an item. What she did before she started a proper relationship with you is entirely her own business and not something that should be coming between you!

you need to sort out your jealousy because it will ruin your relationship if you keep letting it effect you like this.

You quite plainly say 'at christmas she slept with someone else, we werent' going out, but we did tell each other we loved each other' well...you weren't going out at that time so its not cheating! And so therefore you can't keep thinking she's going to cheat again because really she has no record of cheating.

Is she your first girlfriend? If not does she ever hassle you about the people you were with before her? You are being unfair.

I know how it feels to be jealous but you have to get a handle on it!! Every phone call she has is not going to be from someone she has slept with in the past, and even the ones from other men are quite possibly just friends! I have male friends who call me - we're just friends! you can't carry on like this basically because its unfair on her and sooner rather than later she'll get fed up and leave anyway!

Former Member

molo, yes she is worth this. all of the times when we're happy are the best times i've ever had

byny
i know we weren't going out, but its just shit coz we had been going out before, then we broke up, but then she came back form uni once and we "got together" said loved each other etc. spent the nite. talked from that day at the beginning of november. EVERY Day on the phone for 2 hours.
then 3 days before she came home. she did it.

yes she does pester me about my past too. but i've only ever slept with one other person.
my ex gf of 2 years.
in fact
every girl i talk to she either hates, or doesnt' trust
and this was before we broke up the first time, when everything was ok
and shes the one with the past
shes only slept with two other people tho. but other things she did makes me sick

i know this is unfair. thats why i'm asking someone whose been in the same position as me to help me out. i know that i can't carry on like this,. THAT is why i'm asking for help. not for people to point out the obvious.
sorry
but i've been going thru this for 8 months and i'm getting kinda tired of it

Former Member

....but you use the word PAST. It is the past and you have to move forward and trust that she will move forward with you.

I have been incredibly jealous of my boyfriends friendships with girls but I discovered that its just not worth the agony holding on to all that fear and jealousy.

Former Member

Re: what am I supposed to do?

Originally posted by eh?


but surely people will understand how i feel if they've been "cheated" on.

i know how you feel on the anger side of things when you feel like youve been betrayed by your partner. My ex partner told me he'd cheated on me, i was hurt and angry with him but me being upset at him made him mad at me so i stupidly told him that i pulled an ex to make him feel better. I'm not saying go out and pull some next girl to even things out i was just saying what i did.
But if your head is doing things while you are fucking, have you considered seeing someone about it?

i hope ive helped and not confused you more.
Hugs. and if you ever want to talk pm me.