boyfriend worries!

Former Member

ok can ne 1 help??!!

i am really really inlove with my bf and he is always telling me he loves me and about his feelings. but i keep having these dreams that he cheats on me and finishes with me. and i am really paronoid that this is going to happen.

he has told a few fibs in the past (not major ones like!) but he swears that he has never cheated on me, i think i believe him, but i could'nt bear to lose him and esspeccially not to ne1 else. i have told him how i feel but all hesays is its not gonna happen.

please help!

Former Member

Originally posted by jolizzie11:
ok can ne 1 help??!!

i am really really inlove with my bf and he is always telling me he loves me and about his feelings. but i keep having these dreams that he cheats on me and finishes with me. and i am really paronoid that this is going to happen.

he has told a few fibs in the past (not major ones like!) but he swears that he has never cheated on me, i think i believe him, but i could'nt bear to lose him and esspeccially not to ne1 else. i have told him how i feel but all hesays is its not gonna happen.

please help!

You're paranoid. You either have to trust him, or live with the paranoia. You refuse to trust him, so live with the paranoia. Or dump him.

But I wouldn't bother that last part, cos the next bf you get you'll just have the same doubt about. Oh well...good luck finding someone.

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I don't live to work, I work to live and I live at the weekends. I'm the last of the big time drinkers.

Former Member

well theres no way i could dumo him! can u give me some tips on learning how to trust him???

cheers

Former Member

Can't give u tips, just somethnig u have to learn to do yourself. Sorry girl, you're on your own from here.

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I don't live to work, I work to live and I live at the weekends. I'm the last of the big time drinkers.

Former Member

I know it sounds harsh, but if he hasnt given u a reason not to trust him then dont read to much into it.
As for dreams, dreams can be terribly deceptive. It may be a subconcious fear of losing him, and it manifests in the form of a dream. A dream is simply the brain's way of processing a days worth of information, maybe you watched a TV show with a couple who cheated and your brain scrambled it a bit.
Your brain is like one massive computer, it occasionally makes mistakes, never rely on a dream to gude you. I used to dream that some lad raped my best friend and I beat the shit out of him. Nothing ever close to that happened, it was because I was jealous of him my brain started thinking about different things that cud happen that wud make me seem to be the hero.

The moral is, you have no plausible reason to be paranoid, just because you think your relationship is too good to be true doesnt mean it is gonna collapse. The only thing that cud ruin it is your paranoia. I hope this helps

Former Member

Well, coming from the other perspective...

my ex-boyfriend told me over and over again that he wouldn't cheat on me and he did. Repeatedly.

Don't just leave it down to paranoia. I know i sound pessimistic, but if u are worried then there might be a problem in your relationship that is making you feel that way. It can't hurt to talk to him about it properly.

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Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.

Former Member

well cheers! whowhere wot u said kinda made sense dreams rarely come true. but also wot drifter sais was true cos people in the past have said the same to me and used me n stuff. so i think that is why i get so stressed out ill have a chat with him!!!