Home› Help Desk
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

Archived guidelines convo

BillieTheBotBillieTheBot Posts: 8,737 Bot
in Help Desk
This discussion was created from comments split from: 🎯 Community Guidelines.
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

Comments

  • TheMixTheMix Posts: 3,112 Boards Guru
    edited April 2019
    Shaunie said:
    I have a suggestion. 


    I think you should warn someone that what they are doing is wrong & worthy of a ban before you ban them. And mention the word ban not just talk about what happen or why the user was saying what they said. And make sure when say ban - they know what actions

    Atleast making the user realise would make them consious of things theyre saying and the affects of it. 

    I made this suggestion ages ago on PM and clearly didnt go far

    Thanks for the feedback, @Shaunie. :) This might be good for other folks to know about too, so we've gone into some depth in our response.

    We talk about this a little bit in our Mods and Moderation Policy:

    Bans
    If we notice a persistent problem with how someone is using the community, we'll raise our concerns with them privately. If that problem continues, we may put that person on a temporary ban with conditions attached to their return.

    When a banned user returns, moderators maintain a close watch on their behaviour and any return to previous problems will result in another (potentially permanent) ban. This is entirely at the discretion of the moderators.

    We believe it’s important to work with challenging members to overcome barriers they’re facing on the community. For this reason, we dedicate a fair amount of time to private communication and tend not to insta-ban anyone.

    Warnings are definitely something we try and be clear and consistent with. We think it's important to give someone the chance to change their behaviour before going down the route of a ban of any kind, because that essentially gives them the choice of what happens next. Unless circumstances are extreme, we don't think it's fair to ban someone with no prior warning of their behaviour.

    An important thing to note here is why we might put someone on a break or ban them. We tend to do this when it's clear that someone isn't functioning well in a particular space, and we genuinely believe it's not beneficial for them to be there (i.e. rather than for the sake of punishment). Chances are, if someone is finding it difficult to use the community constructively, that comes from a place of vulnerability. In these situations, a break from the community helps to remove them from a space that may be hindering rather than supporting them, and allows them time to work on those challenges (sometimes with us).

    It's also worth us clarifying the different kinds of communication here. Something we will always do before a break or ban is let someone know that their behaviour isn't okay. This might not involve explicitly saying there may be a ban or break if this continues, but we are firm in at least following that step to make it clear that we need their behaviour to change (again, unless circumstances are extreme).

    That being said, we do reserve the right to be flexible with this. There will be situations where a warning isn't quite enough, but we still need to act. This massively depends on the conversations we've had with that person and the circumstances of what's happened, but we may sometimes put somebody on a break or ban without explicitly telling them it's the next step.

    Again, this is very rare and we do provide as much warning as we feel is necessary in those conversations. Ultimately though, we think giving someone a break if it's needed (especially if it's not very long) is a smidge more important than being super thorough in setting up that expectation.

    There are always ways we can improve how we go about these situations, so feedback like this helps us make sure we're doing the best we can. We're also working on a system that will hopefully make it much clearer for folks to know when they're nearing a break. More on that to come... ;)

    Happy to hear any thoughts on this from you or anyone else reading. :)

    Mike & the team


  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Thanks

    where did that rule about making mutili posts on the same topic gone?
    ive been seeing a lot of repeated posts that are copied and pasted and can be put in the hug, ranty thread and activity wall of the exact same thing and kinda annoying. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • TheMixTheMix Posts: 3,112 Boards Guru
    Shaunie said:
    Thanks

    where did that rule about making mutili posts on the same topic gone?
    ive been seeing a lot of repeated posts that are copied and pasted and can be put in the hug, ranty thread and activity wall of the exact same thing and kinda annoying. 
    Hmmm... good question. IIRC, it was was something we decided to remove in our quest not to make this post too long. We'll consider whether it's worth adding back in - you may well be right there.

    As a sidenote, if you do notice duplicates, please do report them so we can see if they need to be deleted (which is likely the case). :)

    Really appreciate the feedback @Shaunie, thank you. 

    Mike & the team 
  • Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
    hello,i joined the site then found out its under 25 year olds..im 50, so id like a staff member to delete my account please....thankyou
  • TheMixTheMix Posts: 3,112 Boards Guru
    john0207 said:
    hello,i joined the site then found out its under 25 year olds..im 50, so id like a staff member to delete my account please....thankyou
    Hey @john0207. Sure thing, we'll do that for you now.

    If you'd still like support or just a place to chat to other people, Elefriends is a support community run by Mind, and it's open to anyone over 18. It's private, so you'll need to sign up to see it. :)

    Take care and thanks for being honest!

    Mike & the team
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited August 2019
    I don't think there is anything wrong with discussing your own break. I can see why wouldn't discuss others with reason of confidenality.
    But then I'm guessing your reason to not discuss your own is "comparison and derailing support" discussing you think you might be going on a break/ having less support /being more lonely is a challenge/support needed.- so seeking support not derailing it  And for comparison I wouldn't see why that would be a problem since you're either near a break or you're not - why would knowing someone else's make a difference to yours?
    i just don't understand that rule at all since if you're going near a break you'd feel upset about that and it's seeking support. & I know probs will say it's discussio to have with the team - still hard to not say it in like a group chat if you're talking about how you think you're going to have no one to talk to and say all reasons for it. And if you say it casually not because you're angry about it but cause you're upset about it Shouldn't even be worth one point imo
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • TheMixTheMix Posts: 3,112 Boards Guru
    Thanks @Shaunie. :) So it sounds like the main question here is around why discussing your own break would cause a problem - is that fair?

    But then I'm guessing your reason to not discuss your own is "comparison and derailing support" discussing you think you might be going on a break/ having less support /being more lonely is a challenge/support needed.- so seeking support not derailing it  And for comparison I wouldn't see why that would be a problem since you're either near a break or you're not - why would knowing someone else's make a difference to yours?

    The comparison thing could certainly be an issue. People's breaks won't always be of the same length, for the same reasons, or have the same conditions attached to their return. From experience, we know that others knowing this information can cause tension and we'd rather keep that private and not go down that road.

    i just don't understand that rule at all since if you're going near a break you'd feel upset about that and it's seeking support. & I know probs will say it's discussio to have with the team - still hard to not say it in like a group chat if you're talking about how you think you're going to have no one to talk to and say all reasons for it. And if you say it casually not because you're angry about it but cause you're upset about it Shouldn't even be worth one point imo

    Conversations around issues to do with The Mix can make other folks uncomfortable and create a generally negative vibe in the space you're using, even if you're not doing so with any resentment of the service. It can also make the group feel uncomfortable and create a difficult vibe in the room, and we want to keep the environment as supportive and comfortable as possible.

    You are totally allowed to talk about feeling upset or more lonely in a challenge as you said, but we'd ask that you don't bring your break or points into that conversation. Discussing the way you're feeling and the broader situation you're in is okay, as long as you don't go into those specifics.

    If you're in the situation where you're on or close to a break and you'd like to talk about that openly, it would be more constructive to do that in another space or via PM with the staff team. :)

    Mike & the team

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2019
    Thanks. makes sense

     
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 8 Confirmed not a robot
    Hi 
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,577 Part of The Furniture
    edited September 18
    Past User said:
    Hi 
    Hey @Past User, welcome. :) Do you have a question about the guidelines?
    Post edited by TheMix on
    Click here for everything you need to know about The Mix's merger
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,577 Part of The Furniture
    edited May 2020
    An addition has been made to the vagueposting guideline. It's underlined below. :)

    Vagueposting
    Posting about frustrations with another community member isn't cool. Even when you don't mention their name, people will know you're referring to someone here and the vagueness causes speculation, paranoia, and creates an unwelcoming and unsupportive atmosphere for others.

    If you need to vent about another member, either do it elsewhere or drop us a PM, where we will be more than happy to provide a listening ear. If you're ranting about something outside of The Mix, be specific about what or who you're talking about rather than being vague (e.g. 'my family are so annoying').

    Sometimes, aimlessly venting frustrations and hitting 'post' can be super therapeutic, but this extra step feels like a good thing for us all to do. It helps keep any worry or paranoia around our posting down to a minimum, and hopefully protects everyone from any indirect sniping that might happen.

    If you think someone is talking about you, another member, or anything to do with the community, we'd encourage you to report the post. Even if you're not sure, it's better for mods to check and it be fine than for us to miss something we need to address.

    If something is vague and it sounds like it might be about The Mix, it's likely we'll err on the side of caution and delete it. If we do, as with any change we make to your posts, we'll PM you. :)
    Click here for everything you need to know about The Mix's merger
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • JustVJustV Community Manager Posts: 5,577 Part of The Furniture
    edited March 2021
    We've been asked a few times recently whether it's okay to share photos of or containing self-harm. For now, we've added some provisional guidelines for it:

    Photos

    [...]

    Pictures that show healed self-harm injuries are okay to share, as long as the healed injuries aren't the focus of the picture. For example, sharing a photo of your outfit where scars are visible is fine.

    We've also added some broader photo-sharing guidelines for group chat:

    Can I share pictures?

    Yes, you can upload files on mobile and desktop.

    It’s okay to share photos of yourself or your pets, but don’t share photos of anybody else. Don’t forget that once you post something online, there's no way to stop somebody saving it.

    Pictures that show healed self-harm injuries are okay to share, as long as the healed injuries aren't the focus of the picture. For example, sharing a photo of your outfit where scars are visible is fine.

    The aim with the self-harm photo guideline is to allow space to normalise self-harm and scars and break down stigma, while also keeping the community as trigger-free as we can.

    One thing to note here is that moderators will err on the side of caution with these photos, and what mods consider to be triggering might vary a little. That's okay - we know it's a tricky one to judge and we're not expecting anyone to get these things right all the time. :)
    Click here for everything you need to know about The Mix's merger
    All behaviour is a need trying to be met.
    The truth resists simplicity.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3 Newbie
    Hey everyone
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3 Newbie
    Hey folks
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 5 Confirmed not a robot
    Hi all, Thanks for sharing the guideline. I am new here and its my first post.
Sign In or Register to comment.