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Sister’s failed IVF.

SienaSiena Posts: 15,497 Skive's The Limit
edited March 2022 in Health & Wellbeing
I am really struggling on how to support my sister. She has been trying for ages for a baby. And she started IVF and she was finally pregnant and now it’s been take away from her :’(. I think she is really really struggling:’(
“And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley

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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,615 Legendary Poster
    Oh bless her, that must be so difficult. It’s hard for all the family. The best thing you can do is be there for her, listen to her and just be kind because you all must be heartbroken.
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,031 Boards Guru
    I'm really sorry to hear this @Shaunie <3. I remember you talking about how your sister really wanted a family and was starting IVF. I'm hearing how hard this is for your sister, as well as yourself and your family too <3

    @independent_ has shared some really good advice, I'd echo being there for her, listening, and being kind and also to yourself too. I also had a look online and found some articles with some advice on how to support someone going through pregnancy loss. There are a few different websites that all have some really great tips that you might find helpful reading through.

    Miscarriage association - They have an article about supporting someone through pregnancy loss

    Tommy's - a blog about supporting someone who has had a miscarriage.

    I also wanted to check in and ask how you're feeling? We're all here for you too <3
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,497 Skive's The Limit
    edited March 2022
    Thank you @independent_ and @Aife

    I am with my sister and brother in law at the Peak District been here since Thursday and going home tomorrow but it’s been very tense cause obviously of the miscarriage and they keep arguing and I am getting annoyed with him. And we are tempted to leave today cause he is just very snappy and speaking to my sister like shit

    I did say to him that I am also annoyed with you now lmao. I was scared but I snapped too. Now I feel bad
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey Shaunie :heart:

    Just wanted to send you some hugs and let you know that we are here for you. :heart:
                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

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