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Sibling Relationships

Anch0r33Anch0r33 Obnoxiously Large AnchorSomewhere in the sea ๐ŸŒŠPosts: 1,124 Wise Owl
I've never lived with my sister, we have a 10 year age gap (she's 10). We both class ourselves as only children but I have contact with her.

I've always wanted a sibling so when she was born I was super excited.

We've never had a chance to bond, I met her as a baby and some further times over the years but nothing consistent. Sometimes Christmas and my birthday.

I really just want to know how to form some sort of bond with her. She's so shy and awkward and I never know what to talk about. It's so awkward and I really just want it to be not so awkward.

We share the same dad but different mum's. My mum and dad hate each other. My dad is very overbearing with my sister, I know she's young but he has to come into people's houses and "settle her" before leaving. It just makes it incredibly uncomfortable.

My dad doesn't know I went into care, he doesn't know anything about me. It's just such an uncomfortable dynamic to work with.

I don't know what to do. Does anyone have any suggestions?
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lovemimoonLucy307

Comments

  • Lucy307Lucy307 UKPosts: 993 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi @Anch0r33 that sounds really tough, but lovely that you want to form a bond with your sister.

    Do you think you could try and find out (maybe from your dad?) or from her directly - what does she really like? You could then ask her some questions about that? Like if thereโ€™s a particular film / tv series / game that she likes, it might be good to sit down and watch or play together or at least have a conversation about it?

    I think itโ€™s easier to talk about something you love vs trying to think of random stuff, which can really help bonding, hence that suggestion! What do you think?
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
    Anch0r33lovemimoon
  • lovemimoonlovemimoon ๐Ÿฆ‹ Posts: 2,258 Boards Champion
    Heya! <3
    I agree with @Lucy307

    Ask her about her hobbies and interests.
    See if you can make a session out of it! For instance, if she likes watching movies/TV shows, make it a TV night!
    Game nights may also help alleviate the awkwardness! Simple board games like Ludo, Monopoly or card games like UNO!

    Hope everything works out! <3
    Anch0r33
  • Anch0r33Anch0r33 Obnoxiously Large Anchor Somewhere in the sea ๐ŸŒŠPosts: 1,124 Wise Owl
    Thank you both @Lucy307 and @lovemimoon

    I'm definitely keen to do this, although I rarely actually see her in person. She lives over an hour away which doesn't seem like much in the great scheme of things but it's difficult.

    I also don't have the strongest relationship with my dad - he left when I was 6 months old and I've never lived with him since. He rarely bothers to see me and even forgot my birthday previously.

    It's so frustrating but I'm really trying to make the effort here.

    I even met his parents and my cousin's on my dad's side last Christmas.

    It's really hard being alienated from the family. I really just wish I had a normal upbringing.

    I know my sister is super into anime, I just know nothing about anime or even where to start.
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    lovemimoonLucy307
  • lovemimoonlovemimoon ๐Ÿฆ‹ Posts: 2,258 Boards Champion
    @Anch0r33

    OH.
    OH.

    If she's super into anime, I can help you with that definitely!
  • Anch0r33Anch0r33 Obnoxiously Large Anchor Somewhere in the sea ๐ŸŒŠPosts: 1,124 Wise Owl
    Damn well here we are @lovemimoon I'd be forever grateful <3
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    lovemimoon
  • lovemimoonlovemimoon ๐Ÿฆ‹ Posts: 2,258 Boards Champion
    No worries @Anch0r33

    One of the most popular animes to this day is Attack On Titan. There are others too but we'll start slow. :joy:
    When you have the time, definitely watch it! :3
  • Anch0r33Anch0r33 Obnoxiously Large Anchor Somewhere in the sea ๐ŸŒŠPosts: 1,124 Wise Owl
    Okay so she defo likes Attack On Titan @lovemimoon she was telling me about Eren and posted on her Snapchat story about her crying when he died? Who even knows.

    She's big into drawing anime which is cool as I used to draw manga. Might be time to pull the drawing pad out again to share with her
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  • lovemimoonlovemimoon ๐Ÿฆ‹ Posts: 2,258 Boards Champion
    That's awesome @Anch0r33
    Let us know how it goes! <3

    Wish you the best of luck! :3
    Anch0r33
  • Lucy307Lucy307 UKPosts: 993 Part of The Mix Family
    Love that @Anch0r33 it sounds like itโ€™s working already!!! Keep us posted with how you get on with her ๐Ÿ’œ
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
    lovemimoon
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