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I exposed myself to quickly

ChristiaanChristiaan Posts: 21 Boards Initiate
I am feeling very vulnerable this morning.
I have read through my posts and realised that I have said to much about myself and given people the chance to reject me. I know that some of you are going to immediately say nice stuff to me and convince me otherwise but the fact is it's true. Nobody reacted on my discussion because they do not know how to react. How does one react to a weird person? You just try and ignore them. I often do that. Especially if I am tired and do not have the energy to help or support someone. Many days we all are barely capable of holding ourselves up, so how on earth can we hold someone else up? But that is not entirely true. I sometimes get energy from trying to help someone else. I suppose it just depends on the situation... I like people. I just sometimes need a break from them. Most days I don't really care what other's think of me but sometimes I seek confirmation and acceptance. Someone that says: "You're not really that silly. I kind of like you the way you are." But I know I'm silly and must grow up. Especially when it comes to my sexual preferences. It's just difficult for me. I like the way things have been in the past. I had the best childhood ever. I like most things that came with growing up. It's just my sexual preferences that makes my life difficult. It actually makes me feel guilty that I go on about this when so many other people have so many problems. I actually only have this ONE problem(a few little ones too). Unfortunately it has been a huge part of my life as far back as I can remember. I really long for someone that share my interest. Mm, this thread is taking a turn. Perhaps I should have posted it under relationships. Sorry, not sure if this post is at the right place.

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    natalie_bnatalie_b Posts: 45 Boards Initiate
    Sorry to hear you're feeling vulnerable this morning @Christiaan. Your posts have been extremely brave. It is one of the hardest things to open up and be vulnerable with others about things like sexual orientation and our deepest desires because of fear of rejection, but you are so open and brave. Others opinions on your sexuality don't matter in the slightest, what matters is that you like who you are and don't want to change. It can really hurt if others don't agree with us, but they have their own preferences and choices to make so it's okay if they don't always agree, especially when it comes to sex.

    I've seen how supportive you are of other people in theMIx community and we really value you here! Thank you for being so positive and supportive of others.
    It's totally normal to need a break from helping people, it can be exhausting, especially when you have your own feelings to deal with. Taking a break and letting yourself re-cooperate might re-energise you to keep feeling strong in yourself.

    I think this post is in the right place, when you need support with your wellbeing and emotions, this is a great place to post. I do see the sex and relationships aspect too though, so happy to move it if you'd like me to.

    Stay strong and true to who you are <3

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    Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
    Hey @Christiaan

    I’m really sorry to hear that you’re feeling vulnerable this morning. I feel like that sometimes, having shared a lot about myself. It’s a big thing to do, you know?. I have really appreciated your honesty throughout all of your posts and comments though. Opening up to strangers is scary but you’ve been shamelessly yourself and no one can knock you for that pal, that takes some real guts.

    I am saying nice things but I’m not saying them to try and convince you of anything, I’m saying them because I know that what I am saying is true and also because I know this community and I know that we will not reject you based on what you have shared about yourself. We all have our own unique quirks, it’s what makes us human. The Mix has an incredible community, the people here are understanding and accepting of pretty much everything. I hope that you stick around with us for long enough to see that for yourself. You’re accepted here and we all care about you.

    I can really relate to what you’re saying towards the middle of this post. I get a lot of energy from supporting others too. I’m a massive people person and would chat anyone’s ear off but sometimes I need time to myself.. and that’s okay. It’s okay if you need a break or if you need support for yourself. We’re right here for you and someone is always around to listen. You can decide whether you give or get support :)

    I really don’t think that you’re silly at all, nor do I think that your sexual preferences are weird. We’re not all going to be into the same things but if you’re not hurting yourself or anyone else, I don’t think that what you’re into is an issue.

    But if you do think that it’s an issue or if it’s making your life difficult, that’s okay too. We will be here to help you out by offering an ear. I know that you say talking about it makes you feel bad because other people have their own problems but if this is important to you, it’s important to us too. Everyone deserves to feel heard, regardless of what their problems are.

    I’m curious, what would you like to see happen?
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    _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    @Christiaan im so sorry you feel that way today I know you might not believe it but you aren’t a weird person other people’s opinions shouldn’t matter to you if it’s all negative I know it’s easy said then done but we all are always here for you.
    Even if no one reacts to your post it doesn’t mean we haven’t read it but sometimes we just don’t know what to say but we have read it.
    That’s all the advice I can give on this because I don’t know what else to put about the other things.
    Stay strong
    Big hugs ❤️🥰
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    TheUndesirableTheUndesirable Posts: 15 Settling in
    I haven't exactly been my best self these past few weeks either. We all have our off days. 😔
    Shyness is a disability. Make peace with it.
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    ChristiaanChristiaan Posts: 21 Boards Initiate
    Hi All. Thank you very much. I do feel better today.
    @Liam You ask what would you like to see happen. I would love to find someone that have the same interests than I have and with whom I can share my complete self, without the need to hide anything.
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    Past UserPast User Posts: 0 Just got here
    @Christiaan

    I hear you, pal. I think that we all want to find that kind of connection with someone :) but hey, there’s 7.6 billion people in the world (according to Alexa), I’m sure you’ll stumble across someone eventually
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    david129david129 Posts: 4 Newbie
    Christiaan, thanks for your thoughts on my thread. Is there a way i can contact you privately?
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    ChristiaanChristiaan Posts: 21 Boards Initiate
    I don't mind. How does this work? May we handout our personal emailaddress?
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    david129david129 Posts: 4 Newbie
    I have absolutely no idea to be honest
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    ChristiaanChristiaan Posts: 21 Boards Initiate
    I wonder if there is a personal message system on the site?
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    david129david129 Posts: 4 Newbie
    There doesn't seem to be anything
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    RileyRiley Moderator Posts: 991 Part of The Mix Family
    There actually is a personal messaging system on the boards @Christiaan and @david129 though you don't get access to it until you've made a certain number of posts on the boards, just as a way to keep spammers and trolls from harrassing people. :)

    There's a helpful guide to the PM system here https://community.themix.org.uk/discussion/3592272/how-to-use-private-messages#latest so feel free to read through and figure out how it all works!
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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