What's the best piece of advice you received?

Anch0r33

Sometimes we just need a little encouragement in our lives. I wanna know the one piece of advice that stuck with you - as it may stick with someone reading it too! 

Bonus points if you can give an example of when the advice came in handy!

Best piece of advice I got was that life isn't handed to you on a plate, you gotta work for what you want and commit to opportunities that arise along the way. 

By following this advice I was able to move abroad alone and compete at a high level for my sports! 

Past User

Best piece of advice I’ve ever been given is to wiggle my toes whenever I’m nervous or hyper 

When I’m nervous or hyperactive (esp at school) I’ll usually bounce my knees, click my fingers or just make it dead obvious that somethings going on.

My mam suggested wiggling my toes whenever I’m nervous or have lots of energy and I find it super comforting to know that no one can see my toes wiggling so I still come across as confident ... and it’s less annoying for folk when I’m hyper  

Aidan

I'll put some proper advice at the bottom but there's also some 'advice' I try to follow about life in general which isn't overly positive, but is true and helps me to keep realistic expectations and live a fairly happy life!

• Life isn't fair

• The universe isn't out to get you- the universe doesn't care

• Your role models aren't perfect, and you'll never be perfect

• Sometimes things will go wrong even if you do everything right

• Everybody doesn't have to like you

• Having more than you need won't make you happier

• Just working hard won't always get you what you want

• You won't always be right

• Nobody owes you anything- be grateful for what you have

• If you can't change your situation- change yourself

• For most people, for most of the time, most things are fine, so relax and have fun!

If you're in a huff and want to go for a wander without any friendly Yokrshire folk talking to you, wear headphones that's my advice

Aidan

When you judge other people, you judge yourself.

I think we all try to find aspects of ourselves in other people, we're always searching for similarities in others to assess if we can make a social bond with them. So if you say nasty things about other people, you'll think nasty things about yourself.

If you search for the good things in other people, you'll find the good things about yourself!

This advice comes from my personal experience of being pissy with people when I was properly depressed yeaarrss ago, and just generally feeling better about myself since I've started finding and complimenting the good things in others!

Laine

Wiggling your toes is a good one I use that instead of bouncing my legs now 😂

I quite like the advice that came from my best friend.
She just said, hun do you think people truly care what you do? And if they did why does it matter? They should be focusing on more important things.
 And I got that, we often care what others think but in reality why does it matter they're not us they don't know the whole story. Just focus your time on you and surround yourself with good people

Jordan

The piece of advice  that I try let guide me is: Be the sort of person you needed in life. I know I can think back to a time when I felt stupid for asking a teacher a question, or when someone was unfair/rude to me, and so on. So I now try let that phrase guide me.

If someone asks me a question and I think its obvious they should know the answer instead of being rude and patronising I think back to how I would have felt in that situation. I think its important to take a step back and think "When I was in that situation in life, what would I have needed?"

Dancer

Believe in yourself and think about what you would tell someone else if they were in the same situation as you.

coc0mac

My dad always says to me 'there's nothing to worry about until there's something to worry about'. He knows that my anxious mind can worry a lot about 'what if'. This advice really helps me to stay focused on the present and what has actually happened so far. If the thing you are worried about does come true, then you can handle it then, but don't waste your energy worrying about something that might not ever happen

Lucy307

Treat yourself like you would treat a good friend 

That'll always be my go-to. We find kindness for everyone else around us but can be so nasty to ourselves!! When I’m being hard on myself I try to remember this and think about what I’d say to a mate that was feeling the same. 

Riley

Little bit of practical advice for everyone, if you can feel yourself having a panic attack or a disassociative episode or something similar something that can immediately help is to grab an ice cube and crunch on it. Basically the cold feeling and loud crunching can help snap you back to reality and it also helps hydrate you a little. I know it sounds a little silly but it really can be a big help in the moment!

Mike

Damn, this thread is a gold mine.

A nugget from my professional life: don't let perfect be the enemy of good. Even if you know you can do a better job on something, 'done' is better than 'perfect'. I'm a perfectionist at heart so I need to pinch myself and think about this on a daily basis, to be honest!

From my personal life: grief is a non-negotiable part of love. I found this extraordinarily helpful during a pretty dark year, and keep thinking back to it when I need to.

The piece of advice  that I try let guide me is: Be the sort of person you needed in life.

I also can't remember where I heard this, but @Jordan this is a North star for me too.