Teenager Mom

Former Member

Hi guys 
What are your thoughts on Teenage Mom's 

independent_

I know many teenage parents and most of them are wonderful. They’re great parents who are absolutely devoted to their kids. 

It’s the making of some people. Most of us wouldn’t choose to go down that path but if it happens it often turns out very well. 

Of course you’re always going to have the odd few who aren’t good parents - but that could be said for adults too 

Former Member

Thanks for the comment I appreciate it    @independent_  

independent_

It’s no problem.

It’s a fair question to ask really I’m 17 and I can think of 5 people around my age who are either pregnant or who have young babies. 

Former Member

@independent_ I only asked because my boyfriend who I really don't want to be with basically I got dragged in the relationship.
He wants children and I don't   

Former Member

Thankyou @Aidan but the trouble is I don't want to upset him because when I upset people I end up feeling very guilty   

independent_

@Aidan I also thing the mums have it harder than the dads, a lot of responsibility is placed on women of all ages and we’re expected to take most of the responsibility for kids, house stuff, etc. 

I don’t know many people who wanted or expected to become parents at this age, as a 17 year old I certainly don’t want to but if it happens to me I’d like to think I could embrace it and be a good parent.

@Emoji246 I agree that if you don’t want to be in the relationship, you really should be honest. I’ve been in a relationship now for 2.5 years and even now, honesty and communication are just as important as they were at the very beginning. 

Former Member

Hey emoji I understand you don't want to upset him but kids are a huge thing you shouldn't have to go through it you don't want to absolutely not. 

If you're both not in the same place in life and you're not really into him would it better to break up?

I know you don't want to upset him but you deserve to be happy too communication is key!

I have a friend who's a teen mother she's a wonderful mother but you have to want and love that baby with all your heart it's a big change that lasts a long time

Skive

Obviously everybody's different, but I would generally advise against having kids very young. Not because teenage parents can't be good parents, but because I think tying yourself down with a child so young means you'll likely to miss out on so much other stuff you could be doing, that you can't do when your older.

Use your youth selfishly. Be a hedonist. Go travelling, have relationships with different people, party, have a good time. 
Do all this before children, mortages, bills and other serious commitments. There's plenty of time for that later.

Former Member

It shouldn't be about what other people think about teen mum's - f*ck em. It should be about what you want, what your feel ready for. 

There is no right or wrong answer because it's an individual (and couple decision). 

If you don't feel ready or don't want kids yet - don't have kids yet. 

You need to tell your boyfriend how you honestly feel - write a letter if you find it easier. He might be under the impression that you're wanting kids because you're not saying otherwise. 

My bf and I went through a major pregnancy scare and by the end of it I was really hopeful I was pregnant and ended up not being. 

My bf told me how he honestly felt and we made an agreement to make it work. If he's not ready then I will wait for him. It should be the same with your bf - if he really cares about you then he'll wait  

Dancer

It is completely your choice as to what you want to do with your body although pressure in relationships can make it really hard to be assertive.

Skive

Forget about age, if you don't want to be in a relationship with this fella don't have a child with him. Sounds like a terrible situation to bring a child into.

Wait until you are with somebody you do want to have kids with, and don't be in a rush to do. There's no going back.