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Are you open about your mental health?

SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
edited January 2020 in Health & Wellbeing
If no, why and if yes why?

just wondering. 

(Im just gunna put my answer in the comments just cause dont wanna seem like im saying this is how everyone should be. Just what i do)

“And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley

Comments

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 2023
    I wouldnt say im open at all. Only on an online support group or to my counsellor or to the relevant people who are suppose to support me. But i dont even like being open with my family at all. Even with how i feel. And Otherwise i dont tell anyone who wouldnt need to know. And dont like people knowing. But suppose i would have to change that if ever become a peer support worker cause its in the title lol

    but i know some people are like really open about it because its "who they are". I mean its good to be open about how youre feeling but imo like you obviously dont need to tell everyone you have a mental illness or its something they need to know because its "who you are". Its like if i had diabetes i wouldnt feel the need to say to people i meet because its who i am. Just a diagnosis and not your whole idenity. Like ive been working in retail for nearly 4 and years and spoke with the same people for nearly that long - never told them i have mental illness until they asked me what job i want when im older if its not in retail and said peer support worker. At first one person didnt question it and thought it was just a support role until recently she asked what it does specifically and then said. But dont feel the need to go and tell people. But yeah not that id advocate to not tell people. I mean good to say how youre feeling but i personally feel people jump to sterotypes if say you have mental illness over than just explaining how you feel. If that makes any sense


    Post edited by JustV on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster

    My close friends do but I've known them for 6-10 years. Unless it's nesesary, I don't mention it to people because I don't want to become too affiliated with any diagnosis and, on top of that it's been 6 years since being diagnosed so it's likely that I no longer meet the criteria .I absolutely get what you mean about people jumping to stereotypes especially when it comes to certain disorders. 

    Another reason I'm hesitant about being too open is that it almost encourages the MI to become a larger part of you and it therefore becomes more difficult to differentiate your personality away from the illness.When I was briefly diagnosed with bipolar, I became hypervigilant when it came to my moods. I'd constantly worry about whether I was depressed or hypomanic. I didn't know what normal or warranted emotions/moods were.

    I personally don't think it should be mentioned unless nesesary just to make sure that it doesn't come back to bite you.

    Hope this helped! 
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 8,103 Legendary Poster
    No. I feel like a burden. I keep it to myself.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 93 Budding Regular
    edited January 2020
    My friend knows and she told other people so we kinda lost trust. I’m not open about it to because they shouldn’t care about me anyway. There is nothing anyone can say so I don’t want to involve them. She keeps bugging me to get support and talking about it and I don’t want to, I don’t want a label on me. I wish she would stop so I can move on. I don’t even think my feelings are valid, I’m just a waste of time. 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,054 Wise Owl
    Hmm, yes and no. I always encourage people to be open about their mental health because I really do think its important to feel supported, you should never have to go through things alone. For me, I experience anxiety and panic attacks and only a handful fo people really know about that. But, the people who do know know about it pretty well as I will always tell somebody when I might need some more support. I think as long as you have people who can support you, it's okay not to tell the whole world - just as long as you're not suffering in silence :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 991 Part of The Mix Family
    It really depends on who I'm talking to honestly. When it comes to my friends or family members, even extended family, I'm very open about my mental health and how I'm feeling. After all how are you gonna get support from those who care about you if you don't tell them what's wrong?

    On the other hand I don't really mention it when it comes to strangers or people I don't know very well. Not only does it not really come up in conversation very often but since I don't know them I don't know how they might react to me talking about my mental health. The last thing I want to do is get into an argument with someone in the middle of a supermarket or something. :#
  • Former MemberFormer Member ☕🌻☕ Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I am.open with my mental health depending on where I am and who I'm with. I think it's helpful for younger people to realise and understand that us adults struggle too and that it's ok to struggle and I think it's encouraging for them and opens up conversation about mental well being, for example last night I had a year 9 child open up to me but felt I wouldn't understand when she said the words depressed.. to which I opened up and told her that I do understand because depression is something I struggle with and it opened the doors to a whole conversation around mental health and she found the conversation really helpful. 
    I'm open on social media about my mental health too as it's important to break down stigma and stereotypes around having mental illness, I also feel that it's good conversations because you feel less alone when you see that other people have their battles too
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Really good thread, @Shaunie. I’d say I’m open when I’m asked or when I feel it will help people understand my current state of mind and context - for example I’m feeling really anxious at the moment and think I come across quite scatty at work because of it. When somebody asks me how I am I tell them I am not feeling myself / am feeling anxious and therefore please excuse my current scatty-ness. 

    I’ll usually answer honestly when somebody asks how are you which I’ve found a lot of the time leads to the other person opening up about times they’ve felt the same... Makes me feel like more of a normal human being. 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 309 The Mix Regular
    This is such an interesting thread @Shaunie

    I feel like I'm probably not as open about my mental health as other people, but I do keep a journal where I write how I'm feeling (sometimes I actually find it hard to work out how I'm feeling so my journal is really good for that). I think it works better for me because I feel like I'm getting my thoughts out of my system but I'm still in control of them.

    I agree with @Lucy307 though, it's when my mental health affects how I interact with people that I tend to be more honest about it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    I'm very open about my mental health, I have bpd and it's one of the most stigmatised disorders so I want to help raise awareness about it and show we're not all dangerous. 

    Thinking about this though, I normal only post recovery wins, I don't really make posts when I'm struggling, everyone wants to see me get better, but they're not that interested in the journey.. I feel like they would judge or use it against me, which has happened in the past. 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 228 Trailblazer
    I'm very open with my close friends and family about my mental health journey, and I am starting to be more open at work.  

    In my current job, I have signed up to be a Time to Change champion which is a national campaign to de-stigmatise mental health through encouraging conversations, education and raising awareness. It's really nice to also be able to speak to other people at work who struggle with their mental health to hear their story and coping mechanisms etc
  • Former MemberFormer Member Fruit loop Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    I'm definitely very open about my mental health i'd say.

    I used to be extremely reserved but over time i was more open to a point now where i am willing to share if asked or if i need to :)

    I don't share left right and centre i'd say but i am very open about it when it comes to my wellbeing in college and with others if they ask or maybe need someone else who can at least relate.

    This defo came over time and not over night aha but i'm proud of me and how i present myself so i'm very happy to share x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 274 The Mix Regular
    Such a great conversation to start @Shaunie :) 

    My opinion about how much I talk about mental health changes regularly. 

    I personally always think I can talk more about mental health. The tricky thing is that no person's mental health is the same as anybody else's. This means that although two people can relate and empathise with eachother's experiences, when discussing mental health no two individuals can truly find a resolution to the conversation because there isn't a complete space of common ground. 

    What I have found this means is that if the topic of mental health does not come up organically then it can leave one or both individuals feeling like the conversation has been forced and that there wasn't actually any progress made.

    I try and remain aware as possible as to times when it is appropriate to talk about mental health, but I now choose my moments much more carefully. Plus, you never know how someone might react and what you might trigger in someone else by mentioning something you think to be completely harmless. 

    Anyways, that's my opinion :) 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 3 Newbie
    Yes and no.
    I am quite open with my diagnoses (anxiety and depression) for a number of reasons.
    1. I teach and I coach university students and I want them to realise mental health is normal and that they can talk to me if they want to. 
    2. I want to break down the stigma around mental health.
    3. It’s part of my control and anxiety around it. If I tell people what my triggers are and how to deal with me, then I am less anxious about how they might react or what they might think of me- I feel I have more control of the situation which makes me feel better.
    4. It is a coping mechanism (recently realised in counselling). By being confident about it I can show people that I’m not ok whilst also showing them how “well” I am doing outwardly.

    But, I said no aswell because though I am open and can talk about my struggles, I can only talk about past anxieties or moods that I have overcome. I find it hard to share present struggles or moods- so in a way it’s like a false pretence. 


  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 146 Helping Hand
    I try to be but i dont think people understand  :s
    Like when i say im im stressed some people act like yh me too asif its a figure of speach whereas im REALLY stressed, if that makes sence  =)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 10 Settling in
    I'm not as open as I should be because I feel like I can deal with my problems myself. However when it gets too much I just end up venting to someone.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    Thank you all for sharing <3 interesting to read <3
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 9,015 Supreme Poster
    Not especially, no.

    I struggle to open up to people (always have) so I just don’t really talk about things to anyone.

    There’s a small (and I mean that) number of people who I’m a bit more comfortable opening up to now but this hasn’t exactly been easy either. 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 54 Boards Initiate
    No I'm not, I feel like I'm going to end up hurting the person I tell or making the situation awkward for them. I feel like I am becoming a burden and I don't want that. I try to help others whilst ignoring what I'm going through myself. I told my family about some things and got some support but also got told its just a phase. I then got counselling but they then gave up and didn't continue to make appointments making me feel like I was just wasting they're time aswell. I think it is good for people to be open and I always say I'm here to talk if anyone friend or not needs it as I'm not a doctor but I know better than a doctor on what your experiencing and I try to help. Doctors give an official answer which is non personal where as sometimes you just need someone to understand what your going through. 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 199 Trailblazer
    I'm very open about it, even the gruesome details, but no one seem to like to listen to my story.

    I'm not open about it with my family, they have no clue what's going on
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