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Anxiety and flashbacks- not coping

DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 8,103 Legendary Poster
In a spoiler because it could be triggering but I desperately need to get it off my chest. 

I am struggling so much right now with what I am going through. I am not in crisis though. It is most likely going to be the case that nobody believes me. So anxious. My severe needle phobia is on my mind. Getting flashbacks of what happened last time I had a vaccine and that was nearly 6 months ago (especially when my classmates were making up horror stories about it during the days leading up to it and even a bit on the day.) I have nobody to talk to about it. My mum basically just told me to stop being a wimp when I tried to talk about how I feel. My dad would not understand or care. My sister would not care and I don't want to bother her. Childline are fed up of me. Same with the helplines. My Kooth worker would not believe me and would break confidentiality. My student support officer would not believe me and would laugh at me. I can't trust any of my friends enough. My GP would just tell my parents which is the last thing I need. I have no idea who to talk to or what to do about the flashbacks and my emotions. 😭 All this because I have a vaccine coming up in January. I know I need it done and that it will be beneficial for me. But that does not calm me at all or motivate me. 

"There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
"The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
"I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey Kasa, :heart:

    Sounds like your struggling, we are here for you :heart:

    The Mix have a super cool article all about phobias https://www.themix.org.uk/mental-health/anxiety-ocd-and-phobias/phobias-6138.html < Could be worth a read if you get a chance :heart:

    Your not alone in this, we are here for you, sending hugs :heart:


  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 8,103 Legendary Poster
    Thank you for your lovely words and for the link. Much appreciated. :) Still not doing well right now but I will get there.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • AoifeAoife Community Manager Posts: 3,228 Boards Guru
    @Kasa2103 how are you feeling today? 

    I can really hear how much you're struggling. I just wanted to let you know you're not alone in having a needle phobia. These things are really scary particularly if you've had a bad experience before. 

    You mentioned you have nobody to talk to about it. You've done so well posting here and we're always here anytime you want to talk to us about anything. Would you like to tell us about the bad experience you has last time you had a vaccine? 

    We're all here for you <3
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 309 The Mix Regular

    I just wanted to send you hugs <3 It sounds horrible how you're feeling.

    I don't know if there is anything here that will be helpful, but the Mind website has a whole section on phobias including self care tips: https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/phobias/about-phobias/#.XbmCbYrgqUk

    We're all here for you x


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