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Tips for enjoying single life

chubbydumplingchubbydumpling DurhamPosts: 487
edited May 2019 in Sex & Relationships
I've been single by choice for just over a year now with no plans for dating in the immediate future. After a string of lackluster relationships, I consciously decided to take a break from dating to focus on myself. 

Since it's been just over a year, I've been reflecting on my decision and some of the things I've taken up doing to take care of myself. I think it's going pretty well; I've gone back to university to finish my degree, I'm volunteering, and I adopted two cats :# I'm a lot more spontaneous, since I don't have to run anything by a partner. I actually enjoy getting a coffee by myself now!

What sort of things do the rest of you singletons do to enjoy yourself? What, for you, is the best thing about being single?
sozforhappy

Comments

  • sozforhappysozforhappy LondonDeactivated Posts: 123 The Mix Convert
    edited May 2019
    Heya thanks for this. I've never been planning on getting married at all cuz I personally dislike the idea of intimacy and sex and how you get children. And that being an excuse to have kids whom the parents bully anyway with tough love and harsh discipline. Family life like I always say is extremely annoying and distressing especially these days. I do hope nobody ever proposes to me in the future and my parents never ever try to find me a partner even though it does say in my religious holy book human beings were originally created "in pairs", it doesn't make marriage and romantic relationships a must and if we don't get married here then we can always marry our "partners" God apparently assigned for us in heaven instead!
  • chubbydumplingchubbydumpling DurhamPosts: 487
    Thanks @Aidan!

    Honestly, I've never thought that being in a relationship was the be-all and end-all so it was fairly easy to give up dating to focus on myself haha. I imagine being in a LDR has some of the same challenges as single life: what sort of things do you do to keep busy? I've been reclaiming a lot of my old passions and hobbies lately, as well as taking up some new pursuits like sailing! 
  • chubbydumplingchubbydumpling DurhamPosts: 487
    I totally get where you're coming from, @sozforhappy! People put a lot of stock in heteronormative ideas like marriage and babies and, while I would eventually like to have children personally, I don't like the idea that it's expected of me either. 

    I hope your parents respect your boundaries and don't put pressure on you to get married. You're right, there are a lot of other relationships that are just as fulfilling as romantic ones. 
    sozforhappy
  • ValerialettoValerialetto Posts: 87 Budding Regular

     

    hey @chubbydumpling,
                  Such a good post  :) really glad to hear that you enjoy your time being single.
                  While reading your post I remembered one article where was discussed an issue of being single for  sometime after breaking up. A phycologist told that it's not right to break up and start other relationship  immediately. Cause every relationship gives us certain experience we need to adopt and think over, it's needed to understand exactly what you want now and what you are ready for, it's possibly only after some time being alone.
                  When I had my year without relationship I did a lot of sport, I visited all possible courses  =) in fact I really spent a fortune for that , and I organized linguistic trips for my students, that was amazing  :3 One my acquaint took her dog and she has been traveling around the world by car for 1.5 years already  =) she is really enjoying her time and that's great! Hope you come up with some great ideas :) 


    chubbydumpling
  • independent_independent_ Resident Coffee Addict ScotlandCommunity Champion Posts: 7,875 Legendary Poster
    I was single for over 2 years before I started my relationship with my boyfriend. There are definitely pros to being single, including the ability to have more alone time. But like I’m also in an LDR so even in a relationship, I have more alone time than most. 

    I wasn’t single by choice but as I was really young, it allowed me to discover who I was and develop my sense of self before getting into another relationship. So that’s definitely a positive and something all single people should do. 

    Overall I enjoyed the complete independence, so take advantage of that :) 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
    chubbydumpling
  • Lucy307Lucy307 UKPosts: 1,123 Wise Owl
    Good for you @chubbydumpling and this is a great thread!

    I think one of the best things about being single is having to/being able to be ridiculously close to friends/family. I'm in a happy relationship and so talk to my partner about everything, which means I don't feel like I have to tell my friends/family as much as I perhaps did before. In turn this means we're not as close.

    It's also naturally one less person to balance keeping up/catching up/spending time with when you're single, which gives you some time back as others have mentioned :grin:
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
    sozforhappychubbydumpling
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